Technically Challenged ( Archived) (10)

Sep 19, 2008 12:19 PM CST Technically Challenged
lanabyte
lanabytelanabyteCharleston, West Virginia USA20 Threads 1 Polls 1,223 Posts
I worked with an individual who plugged their power strip back into itself and for the life of them could not understand why their computer would not turn on.

---

1st Person: 'Do you know anything about this fax-machine?'
2nd Person: 'A little. What's wrong?'
1st Person: 'Well, I sent a fax, and the recipient called back to say all she received was a cover-sheet and a blank page. I tried it again, and the same thing happened.'
2nd Person: 'How did you load the sheet?'
1st Person: 'It's a pretty sensitive memo, and I didn't want anyone else
to read it by accident, so I folded it so only the recipient would open it
and read it.'

---

I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. 'Do you
need some help?' I asked. She replied, 'I knew I should have replaced the battery in this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery for this?' 'Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?' I asked. 'No, just this remote 'thingy,'' she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, 'Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries...it's a long walk.'

---

Tech Support: 'What does the screen say now.'
Person: 'It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'.'
Tech Support: 'Well?'
Person: 'How do I know when it's ready?'

---

My friend called his car insurance company to tell them to change his address from Texas to Vermont. The woman who took the call asked where Vermont was. As he tried to explain, she interrupted and said, 'Look, I'm not stupid or anything, but what state is it in?'

---

Several years ago we had an intern who was none too swift. One day he was typing and turned to a secretary and said, 'I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?' 'Just use copier paper,' she told him. With that, the intern took his last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five blank copies.

---

I was working the help desk. One day one of the computer operators called me and asked if anything 'bad' would happen if she dropped coins into the openings of her PC. I asked her if this was something she was thinking of doing. She said, 'never mind' and hung up. So I got out my trusty tool kit and paid her a visit. I opened her CPU case and sure enough, there was 40 cents.

---

One of our servers crashed. I was watching our new system administrator trying to restore it. He inserted a CD and needed to type a path name to a directory named 'i386.' He started to type it and paused, asking me, 'Where's the key for that line thing?'
I asked what he was talking about, and he said, 'You know, that one that looks like an upside-down exclamation mark.'
I replied, 'You mean the letter 'i'?' and he said, 'Yeah, that's it!'

---

This person had a broken lamp which he wanted to discard. Unfortunately, the power cord ran under his refrigerator, making it impossible to move the lamp while the cord was attached. He decided to cut the cord, since the lamp was unusable anyway. He didn't remember to unplug it first. I found him in the hallway rolling back and forth.

---

I was in a car dealership a while ago when a large motorhome was towed into the garage. The front of the vehicle was in dire need of repair and the whole thing generally looked like an extra in 'Twister.' I asked the manager what had happened. He told me that the driver had set the cruise control, then went in back to make a sandwich.

---

I called a company and asked to speak to Bob. The person who answered said, 'Bob is on vacation. Would you like to hold?'

---

I rented a movie from Blockbuster. Before the movie begins a message comes on the screen saying, 'This movie has been altered to fit your television screen.' Comment from person: 'How do they know what size screen I have?'
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Sep 19, 2008 12:48 PM CST Technically Challenged
lanabyte: I worked with an individual who plugged their power strip back into itself and for the life of them could not understand why their computer would not turn on.



1st Person: 'Do you know anything about this fax-machine?'
2nd Person: 'A little. What's wrong?'
1st Person: 'Well, I sent a fax, and the recipient called back to say all she received was a cover-sheet and a blank page. I tried it again, and the same thing happened.'
2nd Person: 'How did you load the sheet?'
1st Person: 'It's a pretty sensitive memo, and I didn't want anyone else
to read it by accident, so I folded it so only the recipient would open it
and read it.'



I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. 'Do you
need some help?' I asked. She replied, 'I knew I should have replaced the battery in this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery for this?' Do you have an alarm, too?' I asked. 'No, just this remote 'thingy,'' she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, 'Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries...it's a long walk.'



Tech Support: 'What does the screen say now.'
Person: 'It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'.'
Tech Support: 'Well?'
Person: 'How do I know when it's ready?'



My friend called his car insurance company to tell them to change his address from Texas to Vermont. The woman who took the call asked where Vermont was. As he tried to explain, she interrupted and said, 'Look, I'm not stupid or anything, but what state is it in?'



Several years ago we had an intern who was none too swift. One day he was typing and turned to a secretary and said, 'I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?' 'Just use copier paper,' she told him. With that, the intern took his last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five blank copies.



I was working the help desk. One day one of the computer operators called me and asked if anything 'bad' would happen if she dropped coins into the openings of her PC. I asked her if this was something she was thinking of doing. She said, 'never mind' and hung up. So I got out my trusty tool kit and paid her a visit. I opened her CPU case and sure enough, there was 40 cents.



One of our servers crashed. I was watching our system administrator trying to restore it. He inserted a CD and needed to type a path name to a directory named 'i386.' He started to type it and paused, asking me, 'Where's the key for that line thing?'
I asked what he was talking about, and he said, 'You know, that one that looks like an upside-down exclamation mark.'
I replied, 'You mean the letter 'i'?' and he said, 'Yeah, that's it!'



This person had a broken lamp which he wanted to discard. Unfortunately, the power cord ran under his refrigerator, making it impossible to move the lamp while the cord was attached. He decided to cut the cord, since the lamp was unusable anyway. He didn't remember to unplug it first. I found him in the hallway rolling back and forth.



I was in a car dealership a while ago when a large motorhome was towed into the garage. The front of the vehicle was in dire need of repair and the whole thing generally looked like an extra in 'Twister.' I asked the manager what had happened. He told me that the driver had set the cruise control, then went in back to make a sandwich.


I called a company and asked to speak to Bob. The person who answered said, 'Bob is on vacation. Would you like to hold?'



I rented a movie from Blockbuster. Before the movie begins a message comes on the screen saying, 'This movie has been altered to fit your television screen.' Comment from person: 'How do they know what size screen I have?'
Some people ought to be barred from coming near any Electrical Appliances.laugh
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Sep 19, 2008 1:03 PM CST Technically Challenged
lanabyte
lanabytelanabyteCharleston, West Virginia USA20 Threads 1 Polls 1,223 Posts
Conrad73: Some people ought to be barred from coming near any Electrical Appliances.


Agreed. thumbs up
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Sep 19, 2008 1:14 PM CST Technically Challenged
FlowerOfTheSun
FlowerOfTheSunFlowerOfTheSunMalaga, Andalusia Spain7 Threads 1,017 Posts
lanabyte: I called a company and asked to speak to Bob. The person who answered said, 'Bob is on vacation. Would you like to hold?'


Must train same place all our bank customer service operators do!!!! laugh
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Sep 19, 2008 1:33 PM CST Technically Challenged
Harleyquinn
HarleyquinnHarleyquinnBetwixt the stix, Illinois USA10 Threads 1,707 Posts
Heh... a line from a Dylan song "Idiot Wind" comes to mind ....



"It's a wonder you can even breathe."

Had a co-worker at a bloodbank ask me what I thought he could do to stop his 3y/o from trying to cut an appliance(that was plugged in)
cord with his wifes' sewing scissors.


Turned out he was a resident at a mental institution a couple blocks away.

I guess the scariest part is that he got a job there in the first place!
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Sep 19, 2008 2:59 PM CST Technically Challenged
lanabyte
lanabytelanabyteCharleston, West Virginia USA20 Threads 1 Polls 1,223 Posts
Harleyquinn: Heh... a line from a Dylan song "Idiot Wind" comes to mind ....
"It's a wonder you can even breathe."

Had a co-worker at a bloodbank ask me what I thought he could do to stop his 3y/o from trying to cut an appliance(that was plugged in)
cord with his wifes' sewing scissors. Turned out he was a resident at a mental institution a couple blocks away.

I guess the scariest part is that he got a job there in the first place!


doh
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Sep 19, 2008 3:06 PM CST Technically Challenged
CowboysFan
CowboysFanCowboysFanWard, Arkansas USA1 Posts
LOL! That was great! rolling on the floor laughing
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Sep 19, 2008 4:10 PM CST Technically Challenged
mbcasey
mbcaseymbcaseyNorth Myrtle Beach, South Carolina USA68 Threads 7 Polls 16,449 Posts
laugh thumbs up
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Sep 19, 2008 5:06 PM CST Technically Challenged
druidess6308
druidess6308druidess6308Aliquippa, Pennsylvania USA79 Threads 13,695 Posts
rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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Sep 19, 2008 7:05 PM CST Technically Challenged
p_seg
p_segp_segCentral, Xlokk Malta340 Threads 4,497 Posts
rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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by lanabyte (20 Threads)
Created: Sep 2008
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