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What is good about your partner having had a bad relationship?...................... ( Archived) (11)

Sep 21, 2008 11:51 AM CST What is good about your partner having had a bad relationship?......................
hollandgirl
hollandgirlhollandgirlSomewhere in Canada. B.C., British Columbia Canada711 Threads 6,072 Posts
They make if easy for the new person in this relationship to succeed.

My late husband was married to the woman from hell.
I have met her personally several times and seen also what she did to his children.

It made it so much easier for me to please, to do things for him.
Bringing him a cup of coffee would be met with surprise, as this had never been done for him.
He did a lot for me too. Often cooking for me, helping in cleaning the house etc. Loved to spoil me in return.

He so noticed and appreciated the little things.
Yes something good can come of something bad.

I was grateful that this bad experience had not made it impossible for him to go for it again.
We had a wonderful 21 years and 20 days together.

Looking to find this again!
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Sep 21, 2008 11:58 AM CST What is good about your partner having had a bad relationship?......................
druidess6308
druidess6308druidess6308Aliquippa, Pennsylvania USA99 Threads 20,283 Posts
handshake

My late husband had never been married before, but he had been in live-in relationships for 3-4 years each. His last one was so bad he wasn't in a serious relationship again for 20 years...but he gave me a chance.

Because we had both been in bad relationships before, we appreciated the little things we did for each other, and we appreciated what we had to the fullest. It always made our day brighter just to be together. I'm glad that I could make the last two years of his life better just by being there...and that I was there to care for him at the end.

I, too, would like to find that again...but for longer this time.
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Sep 21, 2008 12:26 PM CST What is good about your partner having had a bad relationship?......................
hollandgirl
hollandgirlhollandgirlSomewhere in Canada. B.C., British Columbia Canada711 Threads 6,072 Posts
My late husband had never been married before, but he had been in live-in relationships for 3-4 years each. His last one was so bad he wasn't in a serious relationship again for 20 years...but he gave me a chance.

Because we had both been in bad relationships before, we appreciated the little things we did for each other, and we appreciated what we had to the fullest. It always made our day brighter just to be together. I'm glad that I could make the last two years of his life better just by being there...and that I was there to care for him at the end.

I, too, would like to find that again...but for longer this time b]

Between husbands, I was alone for 20 years.
We both appreciated each other a lot, but for different reasons.
You know if both of you enjoy making the other happy, how can you
go wrong?
It's the doing for each other, sounds so very simple eh? It is not.
Selfinesh of one of the two, can kill the relationship in a hurry.
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Sep 21, 2008 1:10 PM CST What is good about your partner having had a bad relationship?......................
angelface51
angelface51angelface51somewhere, Arkansas USA1 Threads 222 Posts
Hi you two.!!!! Well I only had one marriage so I don't have anything to compare. But this dating sucks.
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Sep 21, 2008 1:12 PM CST What is good about your partner having had a bad relationship?......................
kissmedeeply
kissmedeeplykissmedeeplyPetitcodiac, New Brunswick Canada81 Threads 21,310 Posts
For me probably not good...

if they were cheated on or treated really badly..

then it goes into another relationship thinking it will be
done to them again...

My fiance has been cheated on, many times...

and thought everywoman does it...

so really when having a bad one and going into a new one..
they tend to go into it thinking the same will happen
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Sep 21, 2008 1:30 PM CST What is good about your partner having had a bad relationship?......................
hollandgirl
hollandgirlhollandgirlSomewhere in Canada. B.C., British Columbia Canada711 Threads 6,072 Posts
angelface51: Hi you two.!!!! Well I only had one marriage so I don't have anything to compare. But this dating sucks.



Good to see you angel and yes I sooo agree with you, dating sucks big time!
Never believed that one day I would have to go through this again. But........here I am.
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Sep 21, 2008 1:31 PM CST What is good about your partner having had a bad relationship?......................
angelface51
angelface51angelface51somewhere, Arkansas USA1 Threads 222 Posts
Well my husband Timed me . how long to go to the store or my mothers God forbid I went out with girlfriends. He was a policeman and he used it I had a patrol coming by my house to see if anyone was at the house. Every thirty min!!!! that will take the love out of a marriage.

Now I think I may have fallen in love and I screwed it up and a certain D is pressuring me to meet and have sex oh no pressure just everything he writes is about sex.hug
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Sep 21, 2008 1:35 PM CST What is good about your partner having had a bad relationship?......................
hollandgirl
hollandgirlhollandgirlSomewhere in Canada. B.C., British Columbia Canada711 Threads 6,072 Posts
kissmedeeply: For me probably not good...

if they were cheated on or treated really badly..

then it goes into another relationship thinking it will be
done to them again...

My fiance has been cheated on, many times...

and thought everywoman does it...

so really when having a bad one and going into a new one..
they tend to go into it thinking the same will happen



Not my sweetheart, he had been hurt badly but found the courage
to trust again.
I did not disappoint him and made him happy and he me.

But I do get your drift, it could be a hinder to trust again, with some.
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Sep 21, 2008 1:46 PM CST What is good about your partner having had a bad relationship?......................
angelface51
angelface51angelface51somewhere, Arkansas USA1 Threads 222 Posts
hollandgirl: Not my sweetheart, he had been hurt badly but found the courage
to trust again.
I did not disappoint him and made him happy and he me.

But I do get your drift, it could be a hinder to trust again, with some.
I Think he had two girfriends who cheated on him But he cheated on me before our wedding I was stupid I forgave him. Married him anyway.

But these two guys I only talked to them and I even told then
m about each other cause i'd never been in this situation .
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Sep 21, 2008 1:57 PM CST What is good about your partner having had a bad relationship?......................
angelface51
angelface51angelface51somewhere, Arkansas USA1 Threads 222 Posts
angelface51: I Think he had two girfriends who cheated on him But he cheated on me before our wedding I was stupid I forgave him. Married him anyway.

But these two guys I only talked to them and I even told then
m about each other cause i'd never been in this situation .




I've got to go to the store for mom. She havinng a spinal fusion & a shoulder replacement in a couple of weeks
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Sep 23, 2008 2:58 AM CST What is good about your partner having had a bad relationship?......................
hollandgirl
hollandgirlhollandgirlSomewhere in Canada. B.C., British Columbia Canada711 Threads 6,072 Posts
Sharon how is your mom doing?

angel angel angel
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by hollandgirl (711 Threads)
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