I just saw this ad on Craigs list!! ( Archived) (393)

Here's a winner!!

Kissing lessons

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Are you a woman?
Are you tired of guys complaining that you are a horrible kisser?
Would you like to learn some new techniques in a fun and safe environment?

Well you are in luck my friend! Right now you can take advantage of this once in a lifetime offer. I'm offering FREE, thats right, absolutely FREE kissing lessons to the first 500 women who apply. So don't delay, those 500 free offers are going fast!
If you act RIGHT NOW you will receive training on the following types of kisses:

1.) French kissing
2.) Eskimo kissing
3.) Electric shock kissing
4.) Ear kissing
5.) Neck kissing
6.) Spiderman kissing
7.) Breath Kissing
8.) Underwater Kissing
9.) Vacuum Kissing
And much much more!!!!

So what are you waiting for?? Here are some testimonials from people just like you who have gone through this 5 hour course and come out the other side an expert kisser!!

"I used to kiss guys and their reaction was always the same, they would say "you are not a very good kisser, I'm dumping you". But now thanks to this amazing course I've received all kinds of compliments, and I'm married now!!" - Katie (A Real customer)

"I used to never get a date, but thanks to this kissing course I can really impress a guy with my tongue abilities, and he will overlook the fact that I am 600 pounds! All thanks to these amazing kissing lessons!!" - Jane (Not just a figment of my imagination)

There you have it, so what are YOU waiting for? Pick up the phone now! And then put it back down and send me an email for an awe inspiring experience!!


You won't regret it!!



Location: Hampton

Free: Lazy Boyfriend, Slightly Used...



Free: One slightly used boyfriend. Sleeping right now, and for the past 18 hours, after staying out with his pals the night before until 4 am. I don't think he really wants to keep his job much longer, either. U haul. First one here gets him. He'll be out on the curb. Enjoy!

1.) French kissing
2.) Eskimo kissing
3.) Electric shock kissing
4.) Ear kissing
5.) Neck kissing
6.) Spiderman kissing
7.) Breath Kissing
8.) Underwater Kissing
9.) Vacuum Kissing
And much much more!!!!

I haven't ever got to try all of those, darn it. I'm missing out

Oh Wow , you found a great one!!

So are ya gonna take some lessons then?????

I am truely thinking about it. I am so inexperienced apparently, I only know a few of them

i almost crossed the street ... - m4w



before you hit me with your car. i guess it's not exactly a "missed" connection. i figure i don't have much else to do here in my hospital bed so i'll write you a little note and let you know what i was doing out there alone in the middle of the intersection. basically, i was trying to get to the other side of the street. then i saw you: starry-eyed, entranced with whoever you were talking to on your cell phone. i wished it was me on the other end of that line instead of under your car. i wish we could've met some other way or even at all for that matter. i don't blame you for just driving away; not noticing the unconcious speed bump that loves you. you're not ready for this and i'm not sure i am either. i do know this . . . if you're interested maybe we could meet up next month when i'm released and i could help clean up some of the blood i think i might have accidentally spurted onto your vehicle. maybe we could get dinner or something. i'll drive.


Location: Denver.....

OMG

Want your ex-boyfriend back? I can help.

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So, I've recently come to the realization that I possess a remarkable skill. I have the ability to reconnect women with ex-boyfriends that broke up with them. Now, some of you might be saying "Hey, that's pretty cool! How do you do that? I could make millions, or at least I could use that to trick women into sleeping with me!". Let me tell you, it sucks! The last three "girlfriends" I've had have all had their ex-boyfriends contact them shortly after starting to date me!

It took about a month and a half after we began dating for the first girl's ex to reconnect with her. And I really liked her (and he is an abusive a**hole, she deserves so much better). Man did that suck. With the second girl, it took about three and a half weeks for her guy to come back (he was supposed to have left the freaking country!). I really liked her too. The third girl, it took her ex literally two days to contact her after our first date (and they had been apart for over five years!).

So, I appear to be getting better at this. Not only can I get you your boyfriend back within a few days, I can bring him back from incredibly unlikely circumstances. Have you been pining over an ex? Want him to give you a call? Perhaps he moved to Russia 12 years ago, got married, has 7 children, and you haven't heard from him since. No problem! One dinner and a movie with me and he'll likely be waiting on your doorstep when I drop you off.

Now, I haven't had a chance to properly test this, but I suspect that my skill works much better if we sleep together. Now, this might not be absolutely necessary, but you do really want to see your ex again right? Why risk it.

The man has skill.....