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UFO ( Archived) (6)

Sep 27, 2008 10:02 PM CST UFO
desmond
desmonddesmondkissimmee, Florida USA586 Threads 13,816 Posts
A flying saucer landed at a gas station on a lonely country road. The two space aliens inside seemed completely unconcerned about detection; in fact, the letters "UFO" were emblazoned in big, bold letters on one side of their shiny craft.
As the station owner stood and gawked in silence, paralyzed with shock, his young, blonde attendant nonchalantly filled up the tank and then waved to the two aliens as they took off. "Do you realize what just happened?" the station owner finally
uttered. "Yeah," said the blonde attendant. "So?"
"Didn't you see the space aliens in that vehicle?!"
"Yeah," repeated the blonde. "So?" "Didn't you see the letters 'UFO' on the side of that vehicle?!" "Yeah," repeated the blonde attendant.
"So?"
"Don't you know what 'UFO' means?!" The blonde attendant rolled her eyes. "Good grief, boss! I've been working here for five years. Of course I know what 'UFO' means - it means 'Unleaded Fuel Only'.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Sep 27, 2008 10:04 PM CST UFO
BarrenPneuma
BarrenPneumaBarrenPneumaGolden Staircase, Ontario Canada121 Threads 4 Polls 2,496 Posts
Alien Persuasion

Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near a gas station that was
closed for the night. They approached one of the gas pumps and the
younger alien addressed it saying, "Greetings, Earthling. We come in
peace. Take us to your leader."

The gas pump, of course, didn't respond. The younger alien became angry
at the lack of response. The older alien said, "I'd calm down if I were
you."

The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting. Again,
there was no response. Annoyed by what he perceived to be the pump's
haughty attitude, he drew his ray gun and said impatiently, "Greetings,
Earthling. We come in peace. Do not ignore us this way! Take us to your
leader or I will fire!"

The older alien again warned his comrade saying, "You probably don't
want to do that! I really don't think you should make him mad."
"Rubbish," replied the cocky, young alien. He aimed his weapon at the
pump and opened fire. There was a huge explosion. A massive fireball
roared towards them and blew the younger alien off his feet and
deposited him a burnt, smoking mess about 200 yards away in a cactus
patch.

Half an hour passed. When he finally regained consciousness, he
refocused his three eyes, straightened his bent antenna, and looked
dazedly at the older, wiser alien who was standing over him shaking his
big, green head.

"What a ferocious creature!" exclaimed the young, fried alien. "He damn
near killed me! How did you know he was so dangerous?"

The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his crispy
friend and replied, "If there's one thing I've learned during my
intergalactic travels, you don't want to mess with a guy who can wrap
his p*nis around himself twice and then stick it in his ear."
------ This thread is Archived ------
Sep 27, 2008 10:05 PM CST UFO
livinglarge
livinglargelivinglargein a good place, Kildare Ireland13 Threads 8,222 Posts
desmond: A flying saucer landed at a gas station on a lonely country road. The two space aliens inside seemed completely unconcerned about detection; in fact, the letters "UFO" were emblazoned in big, bold letters on one side of their shiny craft.
As the station owner stood and gawked in silence, paralyzed with shock, his young, blonde attendant nonchalantly filled up the tank and then waved to the two aliens as they took off. "Do you realize what just happened?" the station owner finally
uttered. "Yeah," said the blonde attendant. "So?"
"Didn't you see the space aliens in that vehicle?!"
"Yeah," repeated the blonde. "So?" "Didn't you see the letters 'UFO' on the side of that vehicle?!" "Yeah," repeated the blonde attendant.
"So?"
"Don't you know what 'UFO' means?!" The blonde attendant rolled her eyes. "Good grief, boss! I've been working here for five years. Of course I know what 'UFO' means - it means 'Unleaded Fuel Only'.

Ah haahaa good one Desmond rolling on the floor laughing
------ This thread is Archived ------
Sep 27, 2008 10:07 PM CST UFO
livinglarge
livinglargelivinglargein a good place, Kildare Ireland13 Threads 8,222 Posts
BarrenPneuma: Alien Persuasion

Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near a gas station that was
closed for the night. They approached one of the gas pumps and the
younger alien addressed it saying, "Greetings, Earthling. We come in
peace. Take us to your leader."

The gas pump, of course, didn't respond. The younger alien became angry
at the lack of response. The older alien said, "I'd calm down if I were
you."

The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting. Again,
there was no response. Annoyed by what he perceived to be the pump's
haughty attitude, he drew his ray gun and said impatiently, "Greetings,
Earthling. We come in peace. Do not ignore us this way! Take us to your
leader or I will fire!"

The older alien again warned his comrade saying, "You probably don't
want to do that! I really don't think you should make him mad."
"Rubbish," replied the cocky, young alien. He aimed his weapon at the
pump and opened fire. There was a huge explosion. A massive fireball
roared towards them and blew the younger alien off his feet and
deposited him a burnt, smoking mess about 200 yards away in a cactus
patch.

Half an hour passed. When he finally regained consciousness, he
refocused his three eyes, straightened his bent antenna, and looked
dazedly at the older, wiser alien who was standing over him shaking his
big, green head.

"What a ferocious creature!" exclaimed the young, fried alien. "He damn
near killed me! How did you know he was so dangerous?"

The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his crispy
friend and replied, "If there's one thing I've learned during my
intergalactic travels, you don't want to mess with a guy who can wrap
his p*nis around himself twice and then stick it in his ear."
Very good laugh laugh
------ This thread is Archived ------
Sep 27, 2008 10:10 PM CST UFO
KrazieStill
KrazieStillKrazieStillChardon, Ohio USA18 Threads 5,214 Posts
BarrenPneuma: Alien Persuasion

Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near a gas station that was
closed for the night. They approached one of the gas pumps and the
younger alien addressed it saying, "Greetings, Earthling. We come in
peace. Take us to your leader."

The gas pump, of course, didn't respond. The younger alien became angry
at the lack of response. The older alien said, "I'd calm down if I were
you."

The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting. Again,
there was no response. Annoyed by what he perceived to be the pump's
haughty attitude, he drew his ray gun and said impatiently, "Greetings,
Earthling. We come in peace. Do not ignore us this way! Take us to your
leader or I will fire!"

The older alien again warned his comrade saying, "You probably don't
want to do that! I really don't think you should make him mad."
"Rubbish," replied the cocky, young alien. He aimed his weapon at the
pump and opened fire. There was a huge explosion. A massive fireball
roared towards them and blew the younger alien off his feet and
deposited him a burnt, smoking mess about 200 yards away in a cactus
patch.

Half an hour passed. When he finally regained consciousness, he
refocused his three eyes, straightened his bent antenna, and looked
dazedly at the older, wiser alien who was standing over him shaking his
big, green head.

"What a ferocious creature!" exclaimed the young, fried alien. "He damn
near killed me! How did you know he was so dangerous?"

The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his crispy
friend and replied, "If there's one thing I've learned during my
intergalactic travels, you don't want to mess with a guy who can wrap
his p*nis around himself twice and then stick it in his ear."


OMG too funnyjaw drop rolling on the floor laughing
------ This thread is Archived ------
Sep 27, 2008 10:13 PM CST UFO
desmond
desmonddesmondkissimmee, Florida USA586 Threads 13,816 Posts
BarrenPneuma: Alien Persuasion

Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near a gas station that was
closed for the night. They approached one of the gas pumps and the
younger alien addressed it saying, "Greetings, Earthling. We come in
peace. Take us to your leader."

The gas pump, of course, didn't respond. The younger alien became angry
at the lack of response. The older alien said, "I'd calm down if I were
you."

The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting. Again,
there was no response. Annoyed by what he perceived to be the pump's
haughty attitude, he drew his ray gun and said impatiently, "Greetings,
Earthling. We come in peace. Do not ignore us this way! Take us to your
leader or I will fire!"

The older alien again warned his comrade saying, "You probably don't
want to do that! I really don't think you should make him mad."
"Rubbish," replied the cocky, young alien. He aimed his weapon at the
pump and opened fire. There was a huge explosion. A massive fireball
roared towards them and blew the younger alien off his feet and
deposited him a burnt, smoking mess about 200 yards away in a cactus
patch.

Half an hour passed. When he finally regained consciousness, he
refocused his three eyes, straightened his bent antenna, and looked
dazedly at the older, wiser alien who was standing over him shaking his
big, green head.

"What a ferocious creature!" exclaimed the young, fried alien. "He damn
near killed me! How did you know he was so dangerous?"

The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his crispy
friend and replied, "If there's one thing I've learned during my
intergalactic travels, you don't want to mess with a guy who can wrap
his p*nis around himself twice and then stick it in his ear."



rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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