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Things you learn at a zoo ( Archived) (8)

Oct 20, 2008 3:16 PM CST Things you learn at a zoo
PietroPaoloV
PietroPaoloVPietroPaoloVGöteborg, Vastra Gotaland Sweden113 Threads 5 Polls 1,509 Posts
In a Chimp vs. Lion arm-wrestling show-down, the Chimp will win on W.O, because it has arms.

If you’re fed up with the Jumping Antelope’s jumping tics and want to have it stop for a while, it’s sorted if you leave it in the lion’s just a short spell.

A Hippopotamus is a Rhinoceros who’s had his horn nicked by Libyan jungle pirates, and who’s never been to a dentist.

People only go to check out the enclosed creatures, but never take the time to check out the free ones, like the insects and local birds which is a bit sad.

The reason you see some Flamingos stand on one leg is because most of them are known to drink and fly and there are constant alco-checks by the Flamingo police, why there’s Flamingos stood on one leg, and the other Flamingo next to it is the police-Flamingo doing a balance check.

The Frill-necked lizard is really an insect dying to come out as being such, but it’s worried it’ll be bugged by the other animals if it does.

Wildebeest prefer disco.

Llama prefer rock’n’roll.

All animals hate every single Oasis track, even the camels.

Crocodile can grow an afro if they want to, but they don’t want to, out of spite.

All male Flamingos are metrosexual birds, hence the pink feathers.

If the animal start to run, all at once and in the same cardinal direction, an earthquake is about to shake your arse. Run in the same direction, even if you have to run between a Bengal tiger and Great White Shark.

The ostrich is a complete waste of wings.

The sad thing about a zoo is that the citizens there are caged, they’re treated like animals.

Spiders are the alien species we wonder about whether they exist, and if they do “will they ever visit?” They’re already here, pal.

The Kookaburra , Oystercatcher and Kingfisher are addicted to poker.

Woodpeckers , Boobies and Shags are some pervert birds

The Peacock is getting ridiculed by the other ones due to its telling name.

A Roadrunner doesn’t go meep-meep, not even if you throw a brick at it.

Some people can have a hummingbird fly in through one ear, and out the other, and they wouldn’t notice a thing.

The Pelican can down some serious amounts of pints and moonshine.

If you crossed a boa constrictor with a hedgehog you would get loads of barbed wire.

The elephant is the only animal capable of giving himself a blow-job, and it will look mighty……. never mind.

A giraffe can give an elephant a blow-job and it will look mighty….. never mind.

A parrot never walks into a bar at a zoo.
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Nov 17, 2008 4:58 PM CST Things you learn at a zoo
PietroPaoloV
PietroPaoloVPietroPaoloVGöteborg, Vastra Gotaland Sweden113 Threads 5 Polls 1,509 Posts
Here you go, E
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Nov 17, 2008 5:17 PM CST Things you learn at a zoo
druidess6308
druidess6308druidess6308Aliquippa, Pennsylvania USA99 Threads 20,283 Posts
OMG...you're just too funny sometimes, PPV. rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing And yes, if a Bengal Tiger and a Great White Shark are ever running in the same direction, rest assured I will be running with them because something has really got to be wrong with the world for that one! rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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Nov 17, 2008 6:08 PM CST Things you learn at a zoo
mbcasey
mbcaseymbcaseyNorth Myrtle Beach, South Carolina USA78 Threads 7 Polls 21,350 Posts
Octopii can have 8 wives
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Nov 17, 2008 6:12 PM CST Things you learn at a zoo
littlewolf
littlewolflittlewolfnunya, Oklahoma USA11 Threads 755 Posts
PietroPaoloV: In a Chimp vs. Lion arm-wrestling show-down, the Chimp will win on W.O, because it has arms.

If you’re fed up with the Jumping Antelope’s jumping tics and want to have it stop for a while, it’s sorted if you leave it in the lion’s just a short spell.

A Hippopotamus is a Rhinoceros who’s had his horn nicked by Libyan jungle pirates, and who’s never been to a dentist.

People only go to check out the enclosed creatures, but never take the time to check out the free ones, like the insects and local birds which is a bit sad.

The reason you see some Flamingos stand on one leg is because most of them are known to drink and fly and there are constant alco-checks by the Flamingo police, why there’s Flamingos stood on one leg, and the other Flamingo next to it is the police-Flamingo doing a balance check.

The Frill-necked lizard is really an insect dying to come out as being such, but it’s worried it’ll be bugged by the other animals if it does.

Wildebeest prefer disco.

Llama prefer rock’n’roll.

All animals hate every single Oasis track, even the camels.

Crocodile can grow an afro if they want to, but they don’t want to, out of spite.

All male Flamingos are metrosexual birds, hence the pink feathers.

If the animal start to run, all at once and in the same cardinal direction, an earthquake is about to shake your arse. Run in the same direction, even if you have to run between a Bengal tiger and Great White Shark.

The ostrich is a complete waste of wings.

The sad thing about a zoo is that the citizens there are caged, they’re treated like animals.

Spiders are the alien species we wonder about whether they exist, and if they do “will they ever visit?” They’re already here, pal.

The Kookaburra , Oystercatcher and Kingfisher are addicted to poker.

Woodpeckers , Boobies and Shags are some pervert birds

The Peacock is getting ridiculed by the other ones due to its telling name.

A Roadrunner doesn’t go meep-meep, not even if you throw a brick at it.

Some people can have a hummingbird fly in through one ear, and out the other, and they wouldn’t notice a thing.

The Pelican can down some serious amounts of pints and moonshine.

If you crossed a boa constrictor with a hedgehog you would get loads of barbed wire.

The elephant is the only animal capable of giving himself a blow-job, and it will look mighty……. never mind.

A giraffe can give an elephant a blow-job and it will look mighty….. never mind.

A parrot never walks into a bar at a zoo.
I love to watch monkeys and chimps.But got broke from going to chimp island because a certain chimp would embarress the heck out of u if u were a woman.Apparently he knew a female when he saw one.rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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Nov 17, 2008 6:13 PM CST Things you learn at a zoo
laugh thumbs up That was a good read worth the time....
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Nov 17, 2008 6:32 PM CST Things you learn at a zoo
hollysaffron
hollysaffronhollysaffronwintertur, Aargau Switzerland71 Threads 348 Posts
PietroPaoloV: In a Chimp vs. Lion arm-wrestling show-down, the Chimp will win on W.O, because it has arms.

If you’re fed up with the Jumping Antelope’s jumping tics and want to have it stop for a while, it’s sorted if you leave it in the lion’s just a short spell.

A Hippopotamus is a Rhinoceros who’s had his horn nicked by Libyan jungle pirates, and who’s never been to a dentist.

People only go to check out the enclosed creatures, but never take the time to check out the free ones, like the insects and local birds which is a bit sad.

The reason you see some Flamingos stand on one leg is because most of them are known to drink and fly and there are constant alco-checks by the Flamingo police, why there’s Flamingos stood on one leg, and the other Flamingo next to it is the police-Flamingo doing a balance check.

The Frill-necked lizard is really an insect dying to come out as being such, but it’s worried it’ll be bugged by the other animals if it does.

Wildebeest prefer disco.

Llama prefer rock’n’roll.

All animals hate every single Oasis track, even the camels.

Crocodile can grow an afro if they want to, but they don’t want to, out of spite.

All male Flamingos are metrosexual birds, hence the pink feathers.

If the animal start to run, all at once and in the same cardinal direction, an earthquake is about to shake your arse. Run in the same direction, even if you have to run between a Bengal tiger and Great White Shark.

The ostrich is a complete waste of wings.

The sad thing about a zoo is that the citizens there are caged, they’re treated like animals.

Spiders are the alien species we wonder about whether they exist, and if they do “will they ever visit?” They’re already here, pal.

The Kookaburra , Oystercatcher and Kingfisher are addicted to poker.

Woodpeckers , Boobies and Shags are some pervert birds

The Peacock is getting ridiculed by the other ones due to its telling name.

A Roadrunner doesn’t go meep-meep, not even if you throw a brick at it.

Some people can have a hummingbird fly in through one ear, and out the other, and they wouldn’t notice a thing.

The Pelican can down some serious amounts of pints and moonshine.

If you crossed a boa constrictor with a hedgehog you would get loads of barbed wire.

The elephant is the only animal capable of giving himself a blow-job, and it will look mighty……. never mind.

A giraffe can give an elephant a blow-job and it will look mighty….. never mind.

A parrot never walks into a bar at a zoo.
a nesto o kuni iz ljepe nase....boklips
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Nov 17, 2008 7:27 PM CST Things you learn at a zoo
roseofsharon
roseofsharonroseofsharonmanchester, Hampshire, England UK70 Threads 3 Polls 11,702 Posts
"Some people can have a hummingbird fly in through one ear, and out the other, and they wouldn’t notice a thing"???

I think you'll find some can have a herd of elephants charge through and STILL not notice a thing...??!!
roll eyes

doh

I just loved the one about the crocodiles not growing afros out of spite!!
rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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by PietroPaoloV (113 Threads)
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Created: Oct 2008
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