NESMANOPsheffield, South Yorkshire, England UK228 posts
JOKE 1 : A vicar and a man go golfing and the man misses a 6 yard shot and says " damet missed the bugger" and then he misses a 3 yard shot and says "damet missed the bugger" and the Vicar say " say that once more and the heavens will open and god will strike you dead. then the man misses a 2 yard shot and says "damet missed the bugger" so the heavens open and god strikes the Vicar dead and god says "damet missed the bugger" haaaaahahahaha
JOKE 2 : A man came home from work one day to find his wife on the front porch with her bags packed.
'Just where the heck do you think you're going!', said the man.
'I'm going to Las Vegas', said the wife, 'I just found out I can get $400 a night for what I give you for free!
'The man said, 'Wait a minute!', and then ran inside the house only to come back a few minutes later with his suitcases in hand.
'Where the heck are you going?', said the wife.
The man said, 'I want to see how you're gonna live on $800 a year!'
JOKE 3 : There is a knock at the door so john goes to answer it but when he opens the door all he sees is a snail, so he picks up the snail and throws to the end of the garden and closes the door.
three months pass when john gets a knock at the door so he gets up and opens the door to see the snail again and the snail says "what the heck was that all about"
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