I want a relationship, but only on my terms.... (49)
fireliter: how self absorbed or lame is this?
We have to respect each other, and listen to each other. You have to listen to everything the other person says. Sometime feelings get hurt because we do not listen. Yep those are my terms. relationships should always be give and take, how can understanding even be had in a relationship with an attitude like this?
Comments or statements similar to "on my terms" sounds more like a prerequisite for making a major purchase not the making and building of a strong healthy relationship.
What are your terms?
We have to respect each other, and listen to each other. You have to listen to everything the other person says. Sometime feelings get hurt because we do not listen. Yep those are my terms. relationships should always be give and take, how can understanding even be had in a relationship with an attitude like this?
Comments or statements similar to "on my terms" sounds more like a prerequisite for making a major purchase not the making and building of a strong healthy relationship.
What are your terms?
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fireliter: how self absorbed or lame is this?
relationships should always be give and take, how can understanding even be had in a relationship with an attitude like this?
Comments or statements similar to "on my terms" sounds more like a prerequisite for making a major purchase not the making and building of a strong healthy relationship.
What are your terms?
relationships should always be give and take, how can understanding even be had in a relationship with an attitude like this?
Comments or statements similar to "on my terms" sounds more like a prerequisite for making a major purchase not the making and building of a strong healthy relationship.
What are your terms?
All I've ever asked for is unconditional love, faithfulness and honesty. But it's always been elusive.
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They are MINE, nobody else can have them..
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No such thing as My terms in a relationship, it is give and take or doomed to fail.
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I do not think it is fireliter.
I think it is prefectly acceptable to want a relationship that you have set up boundaries.
I believe in it.
I would never state on my terms.
I have said this many times, when two people become a 'we' I feel there is a responsibility, you are entering into an agreement to become partners to each other and with that comes some sort of responsibility.
Remaining faithful, when I commit, I commit, here are the benefits if you are faithful, here are the consequences should you not be, it is your choice at the end of the day if you chose to be with another when you have committed to being with me. I walk away, learn and reflect and accept my responisibility in the breakdown, but that will be it. I walk.
Talking. If my partner has a problem, then talk to me, I am a great support, do not suffer alone, I will wait, but we are a 'we' and that is what people do who have a problem, they talk to each other, as a unit and see what 'we' can do to solve it.
Going out watching football all day. Tell me. I am happy with it, I am not happy when you sneak off because you think I will not understand. I scrubbed a local teams kit to raise extra cash when my children were little. I know about the passion you boys have in football, I have the same for golf.
If you are sick, I will get you medication, I will do what I can to make you comfortable, I will not sit and listen to you whining all day.
Clinical it may seem, but I am like that, I like black and white, there is little excuse these days for lack of contact, if you are away at war, I can understand that contact is limited, you don't contact me, I will try, then I lose interest. I go.
You do the opposite of all those things, you get yourself, a warm, easy going, loving partner that you will have for the rest of your days.
You mess it up, then you never wanted what I did in the first place, and it was wrong.
Those would be my terms, and I would not mind a similar set back.
Now, who wants to marry me?
I think it is prefectly acceptable to want a relationship that you have set up boundaries.
I believe in it.
I would never state on my terms.
I have said this many times, when two people become a 'we' I feel there is a responsibility, you are entering into an agreement to become partners to each other and with that comes some sort of responsibility.
Remaining faithful, when I commit, I commit, here are the benefits if you are faithful, here are the consequences should you not be, it is your choice at the end of the day if you chose to be with another when you have committed to being with me. I walk away, learn and reflect and accept my responisibility in the breakdown, but that will be it. I walk.
Talking. If my partner has a problem, then talk to me, I am a great support, do not suffer alone, I will wait, but we are a 'we' and that is what people do who have a problem, they talk to each other, as a unit and see what 'we' can do to solve it.
Going out watching football all day. Tell me. I am happy with it, I am not happy when you sneak off because you think I will not understand. I scrubbed a local teams kit to raise extra cash when my children were little. I know about the passion you boys have in football, I have the same for golf.
If you are sick, I will get you medication, I will do what I can to make you comfortable, I will not sit and listen to you whining all day.
Clinical it may seem, but I am like that, I like black and white, there is little excuse these days for lack of contact, if you are away at war, I can understand that contact is limited, you don't contact me, I will try, then I lose interest. I go.
You do the opposite of all those things, you get yourself, a warm, easy going, loving partner that you will have for the rest of your days.
You mess it up, then you never wanted what I did in the first place, and it was wrong.
Those would be my terms, and I would not mind a similar set back.
Now, who wants to marry me?
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No terms, just go with the flow...but i agree with some why terms at first would be a good idea.
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Sommerauer71: I do not think it is fireliter.
I think it is prefectly acceptable to want a relationship that you have set up boundaries.
I believe in it.
I would never state on my terms.
I have said this many times, when two people become a 'we' I feel there is a responsibility, you are entering into an agreement to become partners to each other and with that comes some sort of responsibility.
Remaining faithful, when I commit, I commit, here are the benefits if you are faithful, here are the consequences should you not be, it is your choice at the end of the day if you chose to be with another when you have committed to being with me. I walk away, learn and reflect and accept my responisibility in the breakdown, but that will be it. I walk.
Talking. If my partner has a problem, then talk to me, I am a great support, do not suffer alone, I will wait, but we are a 'we' and that is what people do who have a problem, they talk to each other, as a unit and see what 'we' can do to solve it. Going out watching football all day. Tell me. I am happy with it, I am not happy when you sneak off because you think I will not understand. I scrubbed a local teams kit to raise extra cash when my children were little. I know about the passion you boys have in football, I have the same for golf.
If you are sick, I will get you medication, I will do what I can to make you comfortable, I will not sit and listen to you whining all day.
Clinical it may seem, but I am like that, I like black and white, there is little excuse these days for lack of contact, if you are away at war, I can understand that contact is limited, you don't contact me, I will try, then I lose interest. I go.
You do the opposite of all those things, you get yourself, a warm, easy going, loving partner that you will have for the rest of your days.
You mess it up, then you never wanted what I did in the first place, and it was wrong.
Those would be my terms, and I would not mind a similar set back.
Now, who wants to marry me?
I think it is prefectly acceptable to want a relationship that you have set up boundaries.
I believe in it.
I would never state on my terms.
I have said this many times, when two people become a 'we' I feel there is a responsibility, you are entering into an agreement to become partners to each other and with that comes some sort of responsibility.
Remaining faithful, when I commit, I commit, here are the benefits if you are faithful, here are the consequences should you not be, it is your choice at the end of the day if you chose to be with another when you have committed to being with me. I walk away, learn and reflect and accept my responisibility in the breakdown, but that will be it. I walk.
Talking. If my partner has a problem, then talk to me, I am a great support, do not suffer alone, I will wait, but we are a 'we' and that is what people do who have a problem, they talk to each other, as a unit and see what 'we' can do to solve it. Going out watching football all day. Tell me. I am happy with it, I am not happy when you sneak off because you think I will not understand. I scrubbed a local teams kit to raise extra cash when my children were little. I know about the passion you boys have in football, I have the same for golf.
If you are sick, I will get you medication, I will do what I can to make you comfortable, I will not sit and listen to you whining all day.
Clinical it may seem, but I am like that, I like black and white, there is little excuse these days for lack of contact, if you are away at war, I can understand that contact is limited, you don't contact me, I will try, then I lose interest. I go.
You do the opposite of all those things, you get yourself, a warm, easy going, loving partner that you will have for the rest of your days.
You mess it up, then you never wanted what I did in the first place, and it was wrong.
Those would be my terms, and I would not mind a similar set back.
Now, who wants to marry me?
Some Croat???
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morning, sommerauer71
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HJFinAZ: Some Croat???
, where've you been??------ This thread is Archived ------
lucky200761: , where've you been??
I am like stink on crap, I am all over the place..
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morning sommer,Yes it is natural for both people to have boundries and as time goes you two grow aswell with the boundries
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pubwrite08: No such thing as My terms in a relationship, it is give and take or doomed to fail.
I believe there has to be terms.
For want of a better term, I prefer boundaries, and those are set up in the getting to know you bit.
If I fall for a man, on meeting him, I would not reel of my list, I would at something that makes me unhappy, say 'I am feeling unhappy, because of this' Not 'You made me unhappy'
All about deliverance of the message.
I am an easy going person, I like a person to be who they are, if you have impressed me enough to get me to meet you, then the chances are that you remain the same person that I fell for, life will be sweet.
So, if in any way you were trying to be a person you are not, I am like a bloodhound, I will sniff you out.
I remain the same, fun, laughing, that is who I am, have learnt to deal with my past relationships and what happened in them.
That is not to say that changes in people's lives do not affect them, of course it does, but that 'we' should be able to, if they have a close, loving relationship with me, then we should be able to negotiate our way through it.
And if we cannot, then why?
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HJFinAZ: I am like stink on crap, I am all over the place..
wow
...my sinuses must be backed up because i can't smell sh$t...lookin forward to today's thoughts!!
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lucky200761: morning, sommerauer71
Afternoon lucky, and do call me Sommer.
Such a mouthful my name.
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loverboy690: morning sommer,Yes it is natural for both people to have boundries and as time goes you two grow aswell with the boundries
Exactly loverboy and afternoon to you.
Those boundaries are not set in stone, but the fundamentals basics are there, faithfulness, loyalty, those should not change, but life will change, events will happen, but they are events and circumstances, the true solid basics should not change and that is why long marriages do exist, because they do not.
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Sommerauer71: I believe there has to be terms.
For want of a better term, I prefer boundaries, and those are set up in the getting to know you bit.
If I fall for a man, on meeting him, I would not reel of my list, I would at something that makes me unhappy, say 'I am feeling unhappy, because of this' Not 'You made me unhappy'
All about deliverance of the message.
I am an easy going person, I like a person to be who they are, if you have impressed me enough to get me to meet you, then the chances are that you remain the same person that I fell for, life will be sweet.
So, if in any way you were trying to be a person you are not, I am like a bloodhound, I will sniff you out.
I remain the same, fun, laughing, that is who I am, have learnt to deal with my past relationships and what happened in them.
That is not to say that changes in people's lives do not affect them, of course it does, but that 'we' should be able to, if they have a close, loving relationship with me, then we should be able to negotiate our way through it.
And if we cannot, then why?
For want of a better term, I prefer boundaries, and those are set up in the getting to know you bit.
If I fall for a man, on meeting him, I would not reel of my list, I would at something that makes me unhappy, say 'I am feeling unhappy, because of this' Not 'You made me unhappy'
All about deliverance of the message.
I am an easy going person, I like a person to be who they are, if you have impressed me enough to get me to meet you, then the chances are that you remain the same person that I fell for, life will be sweet.
So, if in any way you were trying to be a person you are not, I am like a bloodhound, I will sniff you out.
I remain the same, fun, laughing, that is who I am, have learnt to deal with my past relationships and what happened in them.
That is not to say that changes in people's lives do not affect them, of course it does, but that 'we' should be able to, if they have a close, loving relationship with me, then we should be able to negotiate our way through it.
And if we cannot, then why?
and that is why to me, first impressions are crucial------ This thread is Archived ------
I like golf.
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Sommerauer71: Afternoon lucky, and do call me Sommer.
Such a mouthful my name.
Such a mouthful my name.
(she spoke to me!)
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We love our children in this way, we do not up and leave them, why not do with our partners?
We know we are supposed to love our kids, there are terms there, 'no matter what you do, I will love you'
I fail to see why it is hard, now as I have aged a little and developed a small amount of wisdom.
We know we are supposed to love our kids, there are terms there, 'no matter what you do, I will love you'
I fail to see why it is hard, now as I have aged a little and developed a small amount of wisdom.
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relationships should always be give and take, how can understanding even be had in a relationship with an attitude like this?
Comments or statements similar to "on my terms" sounds more like a prerequisite for making a major purchase not the making and building of a strong healthy relationship.
What are your terms?