kid's wedding (27)

I have to go to my daughter's wedding this weekend; Don't get me wrong, I really do want to see my girl get married - and that is about it - and see little princess in her "gown" (finding that dress was almost painful). Anyway, the stepmother has been very, how should say, nasty, rude, ignorant...and that ain't the tip of the iceberg. It will take ever once of strength I have to not have a full fledged anxiety attack. But, medication, of all varieties, is out of the question. I need to be on my BEST behaviour! I need to know: How long am I required to stay at this event? Would it be rude to leave before the supper or right after? Is it okay for me to just quiety slip away? What the hell should I do? Advise?

Mychella has said it all and said it well.
This is your daughter's day and she would want more then anything for her mom to be there.
Remember these are long lasting memories for her.
Don't drop to the level of the mil stand above this woman.
Show you have more class.
Yes you will be in the pictures and yes you need to smile.
I often wait until the fotographer is ready and says so before I smile
as it often takes awhile and your smile will by then look frozen.

Congratulations!

This is the best day ever for ur daughter, everygirl is waiting for this special day and for sure they want to share this with people close to her heart especially their mom. You should be there until the end of the occassion to show your love for her and experience everything. Don't mind others besides ur there for ur daughter and not for anybody else! Don't stoop down to the stepmom's level. Feel great! be happy for your daughter and be proud of having her! Remember the most beautiful woman is the bride and ur the next one! Feel beautiful! Goodluck!

Weddings and funerals seem to bring out the best/worst in people. Put aside your frustrations - go with the mindset that you are going to have a wonderful time and to hell with that woman. This isn't about her - its about your daughter and her finance getting married! Holy cow, you're little girl is growing up! Celebrate and rejoice with them.

I have always planned on going - would never miss seeing one of my children get married (even though I think it is a stupid thing to do), I would never let step mommy have that kind of influence on me - that would only fuel her fire and be giving her what she wants. The issue I am having is I don't want to stay; I am so not a faker, I cannot pretend and I am who I am - I want to know if it would be considered rude or disrespectful to my daughter if I quietly just left, no drama, nothing after the ceremony. I have absolutely no desire at all to participate in this at all, nor have I particpated in any of it up till now, that is been the role of dad and his wife, as they live in the same town. For the sake of self preservation I have been very removed from the situation and kinda want to keep it that way I here and value what everyone says, but just as advice I give, it's often easier to say than do -absolute fear can have extreme power. Guess I have to do what I have to do...

Go my dear lady, because if you do not, you will regret it and so will your daughter. It is a day meant for a mother to let her daughter pass to another phase of being a woman. Many would say it's between the groom and the bride, but so many have said they have wonderful memories of time spent with Mom. Nerves get frayed but Mom is the one she needs to be there.

My aunt went to her daughter's wedding. The ex was there also. My aunt was there for the most important parts, went to the side and stayed out of site until she was asked to see her daughter leave on the honey moon.

You will be fine. If the step mother starts, ignore her. Do not respond to what she says. Smile and do your best to enjoy. This might knock out some of the wind in your step mother's sails. People like that get their thrills knowing they have gotten to you, and make you feel small. Show her what you are made of.

If you do not go to the wedding, you will regret it. Your daughter is more important than your step mother.

Hey, you never know, some people have met their better half at a wedding :-)

Go to enjoy yourself. Stay way from the old bag.

*hugs to you,& best of wishes to you and your daughter.

I am going to be an effing mess before I even get there, thinking of a good shot or two of black berry brandy - not advocating self medicating, but man, I did it to euligize my gramps, and I did it well...I like what you said about your aunt Kim, I was leaning that way...it is okay to jsut be there and stay in sidelines and leave when I need to...that is what I will do...Thanks

I felt somewhat the same as you except it was for my sisters wedding. I really didn't want to go but of course I was one of the bridesmaids so had to go.

I really didn't agree with the wedding but went because she is my sister and it was her special day and I know she wanted all of us there (even our mom didn't want to go) but we just grinned and stuck through the whole ceremony and everything. Because we were not doing it for us but for her.

I would definatly try my best to stay through most of the wedding and party afterwards. How do you think your daughter will feel if you left? You don't want to cause any tension between the two of you now do you? I would hope not. You may also regret it later on if you don't stay either.

Do not go to the stepmother's level and be strong. You will make it you will see. And I am sure you will a ton of other people there who will keep you occupied and you will have a great time.

Good Luck!