Hurting and Understanding (35)
Ok you wont to know the truth, 2 months ago I found out that my girl friend at the time was cheating on me, and when I confronted her the guy she was f--king beat the crap out of me, I had to get 5 teeth wired togeather plus other injuries, and im the one who forgave her for this, and im the one wondering why the people we trust the most let me down.
Im not jumping into bed with anyone just meeting realy nice people and having fun...???
Im not jumping into bed with anyone just meeting realy nice people and having fun...???
dragonprince: Ok you wont to know the truth, 2 months ago I found out that my girl friend at the time was cheating on me, and when I confronted her the guy she was f--king beat the crap out of me, I had to get 5 teeth wired togeather plus other injuries, and im the one who forgave her for this, and im the one wondering why the people we trust the most let me down.
Im not jumping into bed with anyone just meeting realy nice people and having fun...???
Im not jumping into bed with anyone just meeting realy nice people and having fun...???
Define "Confronted" !
Damianowen: Define "Confronted" !
I asked her
dragonprince: Why is it that the woman who hurt me the most is the one I feel so strong about, im realy punishing myself over it all and cant seem to find the path to forgiving myself I have tryed to understand, I have texted her opoligising for my part, wishing her the best in her future, saying I forgive her but nothing the only reply I got was anger, my friends have said walk away shes not worth it, I think being an Aquarian im always looking for an answer.
I am realy hating myself for still caring.
I am realy hating myself for still caring.
come on!!!!! aquarians no how to deal with this!
dragonprince: Ok you wont to know the truth, 2 months ago I found out that my girl friend at the time was cheating on me, and when I confronted her the guy she was f--king beat the crap out of me, I had to get 5 teeth wired togeather plus other injuries, and im the one who forgave her for this, and im the one wondering why the people we trust the most let me down.
Im not jumping into bed with anyone just meeting realy nice people and having fun...???
Im not jumping into bed with anyone just meeting realy nice people and having fun...???
Ok
well I can tell you why she wont talk to you...She cant stand the fact youve forgiven her I mean after all she couldnt really forgive herself , could she ?????Its the guilt mate .If she was cheatin now she will aleays cheat so more power to you for your stance on forgivness
My motto has been for a long time
'SUFFERING IS OPTIONAL"
kizzy27: Ok well I can tell you why she wont talk to you...She cant stand the fact youve forgiven her I mean after all she couldnt really forgive herself , could she ?????Its the guilt mate .
If she was cheatin now she will aleays cheat so more power to you for your stance on forgivness
My motto has been for a long time
'SUFFERING IS OPTIONAL"
If she was cheatin now she will aleays cheat so more power to you for your stance on forgivness
My motto has been for a long time
'SUFFERING IS OPTIONAL"
Damianowen likes this.
It's true, often those that despise us most are the ones we have the most dirt on !! ie, you know she's to week to forgive and she is the only other person that knows you know !!
But tell me Dragonprince, in defining "confronted" you said that you "asked her about it. Now, did you do it in such a way that any prospective new boyfriend would be obliged to do you some damage or were you diplomatic and sensible about it? eg, did you have a public screaming match whereby you called her for all the trash under the sun in the presence of her other man or did you have a quiet discussion and a semi amicable separation afterwhich you were hunted down and assaulted by a mindless thug.
Dragon take it from somebody in a similar place and I believe a few years further down the track.
All the info offered is correct, whether they just know this; or its been spouted at them from councilling. It is all true.
And yet I still find myself unable to forgive and forget. I too seek resolution, and yet realise I am never going to see it/get it. Rightly or wrongly she moved on. I really am only now trying to recreate a life.
And that little lie I have been trying to sell to myself for over two years now. But I am making headway.
Your not on your own in how you feel. How you deal with it is your issue though. Listen to what they have said here. Action it. Or be like me and sit and stew even though you know better.
It gets easier, because it gets harder to remember why. I am one little step from saying I am well and truly healing. But I am healing. You will to eventually.
All the info offered is correct, whether they just know this; or its been spouted at them from councilling. It is all true.
And yet I still find myself unable to forgive and forget. I too seek resolution, and yet realise I am never going to see it/get it. Rightly or wrongly she moved on. I really am only now trying to recreate a life.
And that little lie I have been trying to sell to myself for over two years now. But I am making headway.
Your not on your own in how you feel. How you deal with it is your issue though. Listen to what they have said here. Action it. Or be like me and sit and stew even though you know better.
It gets easier, because it gets harder to remember why. I am one little step from saying I am well and truly healing. But I am healing. You will to eventually.
dragonprince: Why is it that the woman who hurt me the most is the one I feel so strong about, im realy punishing myself over it all and cant seem to find the path to forgiving myself I have tryed to understand, I have texted her opoligising for my part, wishing her the best in her future, saying I forgive her but nothing the only reply I got was anger, my friends have said walk away shes not worth it, I think being an Aquarian im always looking for an answer.
I am realy hating myself for still caring.
I am realy hating myself for still caring.
Hi dragon, is that the fire breathing type ? lol
Ask yourself this, are you still punishing yourself for your role in a past event and are you still hurting and angry?
The people we attract are usually reflecting back to us where we are at at within ourselves at subconscious level.
For example: If you have suppressed feelings be it anger and your soul wants you to learn how to own your feelings and find a better way of managing those feelings you will attract people to help you.
How can anyone forgive you if you firstly don't forgive yourself?
Give her some space and time and if she loves you she will get back in contact with you however, in the meantime you could step back from the situation and your feelings and have a good look at your self and how it is you contributed to the situation arising and how you can make it dfferent next time.
Reflect and learn from the past,let it go and look to the future.
dragonprince: No pain and not taking any baggage with me, thats in the past time to smell the roses
That is a really positive attitude and a good place to start each day.
I dare say though seeing as we can only do so much healing on our own whether we like it or accept it we will all carry what you refer to as baggage into the next relationship.
Just like when traveling some will take way too much others will take very little.
It isn't until we are in another loving relationship though that we may find thoughts and feelings arising that we never knew where there and thats the true power of love it gives us the opportunity to heal so we may get to smell the roses yet so many run away when they start to feel those feelings arising rather than take responsibility for them by owning them and working through them.
Other people can not make another person feel it is only their actions that can put us in contact with our feelings and then we have the choice how to deal and heal.And that is true of all feelings be it happy or sad.
I personally don't like the way people call their feelings baggage as it shows little respect be it for their self or anothers feelings.
Best wishes
Hi Annie,
I have recived so much positive feed back and love it, I am walking away and taking with me a lesson from that experience, I know I have no control over or why thing seem to happen the way they do, its just me trying to understand and now I consider that we should of never got togeather in the first place, im the person who deals with my past so as not to carry it into my future, I do not blame any other only look at my role and my head is held high, its now time to end that chapter and to look forward to the next, I have met some realy wonderful and amazing people on this site for that I am so greatful I stumbled across it.
Live Love and Laugh Everyday
I have recived so much positive feed back and love it, I am walking away and taking with me a lesson from that experience, I know I have no control over or why thing seem to happen the way they do, its just me trying to understand and now I consider that we should of never got togeather in the first place, im the person who deals with my past so as not to carry it into my future, I do not blame any other only look at my role and my head is held high, its now time to end that chapter and to look forward to the next, I have met some realy wonderful and amazing people on this site for that I am so greatful I stumbled across it.
Live Love and Laugh Everyday
dragonprince: Hi Annie,
I have recived so much positive feed back and love it, I am walking away and taking with me a lesson from that experience, I know I have no control over or why thing seem to happen the way they do, its just me trying to understand and now I consider that we should of never got togeather in the first place, im the person who deals with my past so as not to carry it into my future, I do not blame any other only look at my role and my head is held high, its now time to end that chapter and to look forward to the next, I have met some realy wonderful and amazing people on this site for that I am so greatful I stumbled across it.
Live Love and Laugh Everyday
I have recived so much positive feed back and love it, I am walking away and taking with me a lesson from that experience, I know I have no control over or why thing seem to happen the way they do, its just me trying to understand and now I consider that we should of never got togeather in the first place, im the person who deals with my past so as not to carry it into my future, I do not blame any other only look at my role and my head is held high, its now time to end that chapter and to look forward to the next, I have met some realy wonderful and amazing people on this site for that I am so greatful I stumbled across it.
Live Love and Laugh Everyday
Thats great that you have received positive feedback and I hope you didn't think I was being personal with my responses they were food for thought for anyone that read them.
I have always taken responsibility for my feelings and actions and yet there are times others try to hide behind my responsible nature..
The more conscious we are the more we are able to empower our lives..
Thats great that you have received positive feedback and I hope you didn't think I was being personal with my responses they were food for thought for anyone that read them.
I have always taken responsibility for my feelings and actions and yet there are times others try to hide behind my responsible nature..
The more conscious we are the more we are able to empower our lives..[/quote]
Yes So So True
I have always taken responsibility for my feelings and actions and yet there are times others try to hide behind my responsible nature..
The more conscious we are the more we are able to empower our lives..[/quote]
Yes So So True
I am going through victims of crime to get two teeth replaced and one will need to be capped, as part of this they asked me if I want to talk to anyone, and being a bloke was going to say no ill be right, but this time I thought no I will talk about it with one of there counselors and you know it has done me the world of good it was personal building for me, it let me know that I am not the sort of person who could do such a thing to another espically my partner, I have integrity and morals, I will not carry any guilt forward, I reconised what had happened, faced it and am proud that I can hold my head high knowing that I have not decived or harmed but have forgiven, that I am so proud of, Good on me.
HI YA
Hay you should NEVER hate yourself for caring as so many guys around that just dont care at all.maybe one day she will sit back and wonder was he the best thing in her life that she let get away.She may not ever find a guy as caring as you sound.So in the end it is not you who has lost out it is the lady and that might help you go ahead from now.Sounds like you deserve alot better than she gave you and if I was you I would listen to your mates who do care about you and walk away and plod on.
Time is always a great healer so they say.
Hope you have alot more luck next time round.And take care.
I do wish you well chin up and keep smiling.X X X X
Hay you should NEVER hate yourself for caring as so many guys around that just dont care at all.maybe one day she will sit back and wonder was he the best thing in her life that she let get away.She may not ever find a guy as caring as you sound.So in the end it is not you who has lost out it is the lady and that might help you go ahead from now.Sounds like you deserve alot better than she gave you and if I was you I would listen to your mates who do care about you and walk away and plod on.
Time is always a great healer so they say.
Hope you have alot more luck next time round.And take care.
I do wish you well chin up and keep smiling.X X X X
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