Love or Lies (14)

Aug 20, 2010 3:03 PM CST Love or Lies
Danny48
Danny48Danny48Limoges, Nouvelle-Aquitaine France26 Threads 207 Posts
You have dated someone who sends you many love messages. Yearns for you? You respond. Then they dump you in a cold and harsh way.
Was it ever Love or just lies as you provided Material help.
Just Using? Then they still love you, just dont want you?
Perhaps just keeping the financial lines open?
Not nice to feel used but worse they persist in sending love.
Insult to Injury?
Were the months of love letters just convenient lies?
Probably.
But why go on lying?
Maybe as they cannot face their duplicity?
The fact that they are just users?







confused
Aug 20, 2010 4:03 PM CST Love or Lies
mariola
mariolamariolajalon, Valencia Spain25 Threads 1 Polls 1,135 Posts
Danny48: You have dated someone who sends you many love messages. Yearns for you? You respond. Then they dump you in a cold and harsh way.
Was it ever Love or just lies as you provided Material help.
Just Using? Then they still love you, just dont want you?
Perhaps just keeping the financial lines open?
Not nice to feel used but worse they persist in sending love.
Insult to Injury?
Were the months of love letters just convenient lies?
Probably.
But why go on lying?
Maybe as they cannot face their duplicity?
The fact that they are just users?


It happens so often on here and other dating sites.

People fall for an ideal, then realise and wake up to reality.

It is not so much lies as dreams and wishful thinking.

I have had many men write and send hearts and kisses, etc. etc. so over the top, then nothing. I am honest in my responces, without the hearts and flowers stuff, it is so not me. I want to get to know someone before I start the sentimental stuff.

Pack it away and forget it, move on and be yourself.

All good things come to those who wait, that's what I was told.




wave
Aug 20, 2010 4:41 PM CST Love or Lies
rytcharlie
rytcharlierytcharlieprovincia di Lodi, Lombardy Italy34 Threads 2 Polls 1,412 Posts
it'd be interesting to know more about the story you're telling .. did you actually lose economically to this person, did you invite her to Paris or what?

Always surprises me when folk speak of love when in reality they dont know the other person beyond internet contact
Aug 20, 2010 4:46 PM CST Love or Lies
mike69spain
mike69spainmike69spainAlmuñécar, Andalusia Spain34 Threads 6 Polls 4,110 Posts
sigh

It's good we are innocent believers at times, but it can be expensive. If experience only was a bank...

wine
Aug 20, 2010 5:12 PM CST Love or Lies
Danny48
Danny48Danny48Limoges, Nouvelle-Aquitaine France26 Threads 207 Posts
rytcharlie: it'd be interesting to know more about the story you're telling .. did you actually lose economically to this person, did you invite her to Paris or what?

Always surprises me when folk speak of love when in reality they dont know the other person beyond internet contact


Spent romantic times together. Love plus? So Paris Trip was a bonus.
She said she adored me?
I believed her.
We went to the UK.I paid. After her free trip I was dumped.
A User?
Think so now.
Aug 20, 2010 5:20 PM CST Love or Lies
Phoenix
PhoenixPhoenixSarkoville, Ile-de-France France110 Threads 32 Polls 2,591 Posts
Danny48: Truly Hate to say you were so right being cynical.
Spot on. Told me that my starry eyed love was crap.
Not a scammer but a user?
She took me to the cleaners and was very hurt when I cancelled her all expenses paid trip to Paris.
Yep put it down to experience.
Thanks Mate!


Danny it's all part of the service....
Aug 20, 2010 5:34 PM CST Love or Lies
rytcharlie
rytcharlierytcharlieprovincia di Lodi, Lombardy Italy34 Threads 2 Polls 1,412 Posts
Danny48: Spent romantic times together. Love plus? So Paris Trip was a bonus.
She said she adored me?
I believed her.
We went to the UK.I paid. After her free trip I was dumped.
A User?
Think so now.


oh I see .. she begged you to take her to UK - you said you couldn't really afford it - then she said that if you did, she'd love you forever. Man that sucks ...
Aug 20, 2010 5:46 PM CST Love or Lies
wordsmith99
wordsmith99wordsmith99Lyon, Rhone-Alpes France2 Threads 399 Posts
Danny, I don't know you and I don't know the female... but would you have felt it was lies if she'd stayed with you?

What I'm getting at is... were you perhaps expecting that you had paid for something more than a simple travel ticket?

Did you feel that by paying for her you were cementing the relationship?

Is it at all possible that she went with you hoping that things would work out between you, and during the UK trip realised that it wasn't what she wanted?

Or was she supposed to stay with you forever because you'd paid her ticket?
Aug 20, 2010 6:14 PM CST Love or Lies
Phoenix
PhoenixPhoenixSarkoville, Ile-de-France France110 Threads 32 Polls 2,591 Posts
wordsmith99: Danny, I don't know you and I don't know the female... but would you have felt it was lies if she'd stayed with you?

What I'm getting at is... were you perhaps expecting that you had paid for something more than a simple travel ticket?

Did you feel that by paying for her you were cementing the relationship?

Is it at all possible that she went with you hoping that things would work out between you, and during the UK trip realised that it wasn't what she wanted?

Or was she supposed to stay with you forever because you'd paid her ticket?


Basically Wordy he was....

Danny...(between blokes--ladies look away)

Danny you snookered yourself...if memory serves me well (it's the weekend so it can be dodgy)....She was in an relationship. Unless you are sure of what you are doing, then full steam a head..If there's another bloke about..Stay away..Unless you are devilishy handsome like me...grin...

Women want the same thing as blokes and if the H20 isn't there at the start it's not there at the end...
Aug 21, 2010 7:30 AM CST Love or Lies
twinself
twinselftwinself..., Majjistral Malta36 Threads 1,347 Posts
Danny48: You have dated someone who sends you many love messages. Yearns for you? You respond. Then they dump you in a cold and harsh way.
Was it ever Love or just lies as you provided Material help.
Just Using? Then they still love you, just dont want you?
Perhaps just keeping the financial lines open?
Not nice to feel used but worse they persist in sending love.
Insult to Injury?
Were the months of love letters just convenient lies?
Probably.
But why go on lying?
Maybe as they cannot face their duplicity?
The fact that they are just users?


Talk comes cheap.... actions speak much louder. *Love* is not messages, it's something which grows between two people who are willing to accept that they are not perfect, and willing to compromise to find that *space-in-between*. But, that, is only through WILL.

Just my 2 cents. dunno
Aug 21, 2010 11:27 AM CST Love or Lies
koste
kostekosteathen, Attica Greece2 Threads 93 Posts
Just my 2 cents.


It`s worth a more than 2 cents,maybe 3!laugh laugh here is my 4 cents worth!I think people who are on the search will grab any reasonably looking infactuation & make believe that it is a solidly based relationship!I totally agree with you that a good relationship takes a lot of eye ball to eyeball contact & not just some internet built fantasy so when we risk banking on it & investing on it monetarily we should be able to handle the failure pretty evenly.My friend here had a guy fly over after knowing him only for a few weeks.He came,he bonked & he left her after a few days.She was all shook up as she said her heart was broken because she never expected that!What the hell did she expect other than that?doh doh doh
Aug 21, 2010 3:00 PM CST Love or Lies
Phoenix
PhoenixPhoenixSarkoville, Ile-de-France France110 Threads 32 Polls 2,591 Posts
koste: knowing him only for a few weeks.He came,he bonked & he left her after a few days.She was all shook up as she said her heart was broken because she never expected that!What the hell did she expect other than that?


Thats a lousy advertisement for blokes....(ladies we aren't all like that...Some are like me --->grin ..I'm your regular Jimmy Jones )
Aug 22, 2010 9:35 AM CST Love or Lies
jahjah
jahjahjahjahhelsinki, Southern Finland Finland14 Threads 96 Posts
You have dated someone who sends you many love messages. Yearns for you? You respond. Then they dump you in a cold and harsh way.
Was it ever Love or just lies as you provided Material help.
Just Using? Then they still love you, just dont want you?
Perhaps just keeping the financial lines open?
Not nice to feel used but worse they persist in sending love.
Insult to Injury?
Were the months of love letters just convenient lies?
Probably.
But why go on lying?
Maybe as they cannot face their duplicity?
The fact that they are just users?[/quote Now a dys the raining of scummers are on sites,just dont talk to them, love uuuuuuuhug
Aug 22, 2010 4:14 PM CST Love or Lies
smoky
smokysmokyUnterland, Zurich Switzerland266 Threads 6 Polls 9,412 Posts
I agree totally. The raining of scummers is getting really bad. It is much better to avoid them completely. But if you cannot avoid them, just keep your money to yourself.
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