Tomorrow when the war began
The soldiers started cheering
Up stood the Queen, gave a speech
While the goose made love with the gander

On the wall sat a great big egg
He was round, fat and jolly
Laughed so much it cracked him up
Now his brain is all scrambled

Old King Merv
Was a dirty old perv
Watched porno all night
And tugged with all his might

Jack was sluggish
Jack was slow
Jack got felled
By a mighty blow

Mary, Mary you’re such a Fairy
You put on a really good show
Leather and lace and rouge painted face
Our knickers on stage we throw

Young Suzie Wong
Went to grab her bong
To get herself really high
But the bong was bare
The neighbour had none to spare
She cried, “what a poor girl am I.”