For Daddy, My Twin

How I hated you:
Plotting
my revenge;
Summoning words:
Would-be daggers
I vowed
to plunge
into your
shattered heart.

Again and again
We’d danced
this tragic dance
of mutual
Torment:
You, the Father
I needed
and loved
and feared;
and I
the visage
of your
rejected self:
the love
you had disowned
“unrequited”--
the innocence
you held in scorn
yet secretly
yearned
to recapture.

Oh, I shuddered
and quaked
in bitter
confrontation
of the Lies:
self–deception.
How I hated them
for the way
they kept us apart.
And at only eight
I vowed my first
Holy promise.
“This shall not stand.”
And, as I plotted
your annihilation,
sobbing silent rage
into my pillow,
I felt
your calloused hands
upon my back,
your tears landing
in my hair
and heard
your anguish
and self-reproach
revealing
the torment
secreted
in the very breath
that sustained you.

“Forgive me,”
you sighed.
And separation
Vanished.
Your pain
was mine
and my heart
shattered,
revealing
the love
we had both
tried
and failed
to keep secret
from our True Self.

We can never be
apart
from
what we are
a part
OF.
Now,
these
forgiven eyes
see
only Love
and innocence.

May 21, 2013