Darkness has taken over me, I sit here all alone. I hear my heart slow and deep. My heart is broken and I have no way to shelter it from the pain. I cry and realize what has happened. The darkness is only in my mind for the sun is shining bright out side of my window. I feel like I am trapped in a closet with no way out. I grasp for something in the distance, hoping it is the thing that will change my life. I reach finding only emptiness, realizing what I thought was there was only the person I once was. Its so dark and so lonely. I have no escape. I am realizing what once was is no longer there. I cry for help, no one hears. I yell louder and still nothing. Why can’t someone save me from this? How did I get here and how do I leave? I was happy and that was stolen, I was innocent and that was taken. I was me and now I’m nothing. I’m forgotten and left to die and for what I’m unsure. I feel like I’m losing sight of life. I know that the hand of death is upon me. What can I do, I’m trapped. I hear the screams of tiny voices, little do I know they are my own. I am about to lose it maybe I already have. I am having trouble breathing it is over. There’s no escape. The voices grow into a roaring sound and heart beats faster and harder. My head spinning trying to solve this mystery that is my life. I feel like there is no escape and I suddenly feel strangled no longer able to breath. I need to end this but how? Do I take the only things in my reach. Do I take that knife and run the cold blade crossed my wrist? Do I take those pills not know what they are but take them all to end this torture? I’m so confused, why me? What have I done that deserves this punishment that I call my life? Was I a bad person for the choices that I made, for that’s what they were..choices. Will I pay for them with my life? Will I let that happen? Will I let them win? I just want this pain to end. To see the sun shine again. But my friend torture is living a life this way. This is no way to live. No happiness, no laughter, no joy. Just the sadness and tears that flood my soul. Is this the end or just the beginning of both the pain and my life. All I can hear is the sobbing that is coming from with in. So yes, I take that cold bladed knife. Its in my hand and I am ready to end this. I can’t take anymore of this pain. I’m not strong enough. I’m broken. So that knife runs slowly across my veins. Blood rushes everywhere and the physical pain is unbearable. But the pain inside finally stops. I am surrounded by a puddle of my own blood. I take my last breath. I see the sunshine and know I am going home.
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Posted: Feb 2010
About this poem:there is a deeper meaning than suicide to this piece of writing...what do you think it is?