This is so much like prayer...
I don't know if you are recieving this,
if you are acknowledging this, or if you even care...
An so much like scripture...
Expecting action from thoughts expressed,
And, instead, accepting actions of thoughtlessness.
Still, even at this age, I tend to believe what people say.
ignore the complexities and idocyncracies that personalities possess,
ignore my lack of appeal,
the result of being adored by the one thing I know surely comes from Heaven.
And so, it seems, hand in hand naivete and idealism cloud what should
be considered as wisdom, thus dis-allowing judgement a proper arena to affect
itself to any real significance.
And somewhere between reason and aspiration a fractured existence sustains itself by
the strength of it's own acknowledgement. And, herein, incident and happenstance ebb
and flow occasionally depositing into pools of fate, from which something
even greater, may spring. And it is from this slight chance
that faith, hope, prayers, and desires dare their presence upon the vastness of such an
unequal balance.
And so I listen to the Siren songs, get distracted by shiny things, and believe cosmetics,
powders and scents, are as natural as rain and sunlight. I revel in conversations
hushed as prayer, and believe these intimacies are shrouded in something
that no two others could imagine. And so I am lulled to complaicancy by vignette memories,
smoked glass images, breath soft sounds of warm compassionate thoughts, once expressed
to the heart. Sound memories of what is not.
And, from this dull ache, I will rest....... and awaken each
morning with a prayer and promise to obey all signs, and direct a
course to acknowledge only those things affecting the one thing that matters
to my existence. The one thing I know surely comes from Heaven.