1. Things are never quite as scary when you've got a best friend. 2. Reality continues to ruin my life. 3. It's not denial. I'm just selective about the reality I accept. 4. The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us. 5. Know what's weird? Day by day, nothing seems to change. But pretty soon, everything's different. 6. We don't devote enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks. 7. Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery. 8. Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless. 9. Nothing helps a bad mood like spreading it around. 10. It seems like once people grow up, they have no idea what's cool. 11. The purpose of writing is to inflate weak ideas, obscure pure reasoning, and inhibit clarity. With a little practice, writing can be an intimidating and impenetrable fog! 12. Why waste time learning, when ignorance is instantaneous? 13. Shutting off the thought process is not rejuvenating; the mind is like a car battery - it recharges by running. 14. I think we dream so we don't have to be apart so long. If we're in each other's dreams, we can play together all night. 15. I won't eat any cereal that doesn't turn the milk purple. 16. The problem with the future is that it keeps turning into the present. 17. I know the world isn't fair, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor? 18. If you can't control your peanut butter, you can't expect to control your life. 19. God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I am so far behind that I will never die. 20. I liked things better when I didn't understand them. 21. There is not enough time to do all the nothing we want to do. 22. Mothers are the necessity of invention. 23. From now on, I'll connect the dots my own way. 24. So, what's it like in the real world? Well, the food is better, but beyond that, I don't recommend it.
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Bill Watterson. World's Greatest Contemporary Philosopher(Vote Below)
2. Reality continues to ruin my life.
3. It's not denial. I'm just selective about the reality I accept.
4. The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.
5. Know what's weird? Day by day, nothing seems to change. But pretty soon, everything's different.
6. We don't devote enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks.
7. Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery.
8. Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless.
9. Nothing helps a bad mood like spreading it around.
10. It seems like once people grow up, they have no idea what's cool.
11. The purpose of writing is to inflate weak ideas, obscure pure reasoning, and inhibit clarity. With a little practice, writing can be an intimidating and impenetrable fog!
12. Why waste time learning, when ignorance is instantaneous?
13. Shutting off the thought process is not rejuvenating; the mind is like a car battery - it recharges by running.
14. I think we dream so we don't have to be apart so long. If we're in each other's dreams, we can play together all night.
15. I won't eat any cereal that doesn't turn the milk purple.
16. The problem with the future is that it keeps turning into the present.
17. I know the world isn't fair, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor?
18. If you can't control your peanut butter, you can't expect to control your life.
19. God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I am so far behind that I will never die.
20. I liked things better when I didn't understand them.
21. There is not enough time to do all the nothing we want to do.
22. Mothers are the necessity of invention.
23. From now on, I'll connect the dots my own way.
24. So, what's it like in the real world? Well, the food is better, but beyond that, I don't recommend it.