Ronnie79 for RONNIE79 CALLING RONNIE79 (73)

I'll save up a week's worth so

Are you planning on be "naughty" with someone that you need to save your extra good deeds so you don't feel guilty about being "bad".....?

I don't believe in guilt or regret.

Both are useless, destructive, emotions.

I try to avoid then as much as possible.

You can read it any way you like

Thanks for allowing me some very liberal interpretations....So you are a naughty Vulcan who likes to be bad.

If your liberal interpretations keep you happy, who am I to burst your bubble.

Considering I can only see blanks instead of videos, I will choose no!

I'm back on my phone again until I get my tablet back.

Whats the issue with the tablet? You can pick up a decent lappy from ebay for 70 green backs...

They fixed the initial problem fine. And I got it back. But then there was a secondary problem, probably caused by a loose connection after them fixing it, so it had to go back.

I've never had an iPad so can't really compare.

Thanks for the jokes.

All part of the service Molly......

(Here are some more daft joke...sorry in advance)



1. Two blondes walked into a building..........you'd think at least one of them would have seen it.

2. Phone answering machine message - '...If you want marijuana, press the hash key...'

3. A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only Gladwrap for shorts. The shrink says, 'Well, I can clearly see you're nuts.'

4. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.

5. I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 quid that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, 'No, the steaks are too high..'

6. My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him in.

7. A man came round in hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, 'Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!' The doctor replied, 'I know you can't, I've cut your arms off'..

8. I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a muscle.

9. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. They lit a fire in the craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

10. Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with hundreds and thousands.. Police say that he topped himself.

11. Man goes to the doctor, with a strawberry growing out of his head. Doc says 'I'll give you some cream to put on it.'

12. 'Doc I can't stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home'. 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome.' 'Is it common? ' 'It's not unusual'.

13. A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. 'My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?' 'Well,' says the vet, 'let's have a look at him' So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says, 'I'm going to have to put him down.' 'What? Because he's cross-eyed? 'No, because he's really heavy'

14. Guy goes into the doctor's. 'Doc, I've got a cricket ball stuck up my backside.' 'How's that?' the doctor asks. 'Don't you start' says the guy.

15. Two elephants walk off a cliff...boom, boom!

16. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

17. So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me 'Can you give me a lift?' I said 'Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'

18. Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. There are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my Dad, or my older Brother Colin, or my younger Brother Ho-Cha-Chu. But I think it's Colin.

19. Two fat blokes in a pub, one says to the other 'Your round.' The other one says 'So are you, you fat bast**d!'

20. Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, and the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.

21. 'You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen. It said, 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice.'

22. A man walked into the doctors, he said, 'I've hurt my arm in several places' The doctor said, 'Well don't go there anymore'

23. Ireland 's worst air disaster occurred early this morning when a small two-seater Cessna plane crashed into a cemetery. Irish search and rescue workers have recovered 1826 bodies so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the night.

Is No.2 your phone message?

Why didnt u send me any emails? I had a girl lock me in her housse once.

well he's all yours