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Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters? ( Archived) (144)

Feb 5, 2008 10:19 AM CSTWhats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
trish123
trish123trish123Macclesfield, Cheshire, England, UK231 Threads 6 Polls 19,911 Posts

Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?(Vote Below)

- (To Vote: select an option above, then press this button)
ignore their threads
151
46%
report them
109
33%
tell em what you think of em
18
5%
hijack their threads
6
2%
allow their threads the attention they are seeking
1
0%
pity them
14
4%
respond with only hugs and pleasant emoticons
7
2%
point out rules on abusive bahaviour
10
3%
other suggestion
10
3%
send personal e-mail requesting more consideration
2
1%
Total Votes
328
There have been a few abusive posts in the last few days and months - how do you think it best to deal with these posters?

My favourite is to ignore them and not let them have a negative reaction on the forum at all.

Thanks to Dizzy Di who is on the phone and helped with these options.
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Feb 5, 2008 10:19 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
trish123
trish123trish123Macclesfield, Cheshire, England UK231 Threads 6 Polls 19,911 Posts
There have been a few abusive posts in the last few days and months - how do you think it best to deal with these posters?

My favourite is to ignore them and not let them have a negative reaction on the forum at all.

Thanks to Dizzy Di who is on the phone and helped with these options.
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Feb 5, 2008 10:22 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
nuala
nualanualadublin, Dublin Ireland12 Threads 8,806 Posts
wave hi trish......I just ignore them as i save my energy for better things....wink wink

How are you doing girl!!!teddybear have you finished that essay yet....all of them thousand of thousands words.....yay hug hug hug
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Feb 5, 2008 10:24 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
skimpydoo
skimpydooskimpydooDublin, Ireland275 Threads 3 Polls 7,032 Posts
Trish, try and ignore them if possible sending them to Coventry will piss them off more than any replies.
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Feb 5, 2008 10:24 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
trish123
trish123trish123Macclesfield, Cheshire, England UK231 Threads 6 Polls 19,911 Posts
Im working frantically as we speak Nuala - the deadline is drawing excruciatingly near laugh hug teddybear
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Feb 5, 2008 10:25 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
morganlee
morganleemorganleeQawra, Majjistral Malta32 Threads 1 Polls 7,360 Posts
i agree ignoring them, but when they become really personal using crude and offensive language i find that hard to do.
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Feb 5, 2008 10:25 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
trish123
trish123trish123Macclesfield, Cheshire, England UK231 Threads 6 Polls 19,911 Posts
skimpydoo: Trish, try and ignore them if possible sending them to Coventry will piss them off more than any replies.


Thats what I do too Skimp wave
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Feb 5, 2008 10:26 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
trish123
trish123trish123Macclesfield, Cheshire, England UK231 Threads 6 Polls 19,911 Posts
morganlee: i agree ignoring them, but when they become really personal using crude and offensive language i find that hard to do.


I know, I do too but if we blanked em across the board they would only be speaking to themselves dunno
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Feb 5, 2008 10:27 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
Scottishlass
ScottishlassScottishlassKnoxville, Tennessee USA672 Threads 29 Polls 4,352 Posts
I think ignoring them is the best way myself. Responding even in a negative just feeds their need for attention.
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Feb 5, 2008 10:28 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
morganlee
morganleemorganleeQawra, Majjistral Malta32 Threads 1 Polls 7,360 Posts
thumbs up your right! but i have failed miserably at doing that this afternoon!moping
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Feb 5, 2008 10:28 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
alabamabebe
alabamabebealabamabebeBanks of the Warrior River, Alabama USA85 Threads 3 Polls 6,177 Posts
morganlee: i agree ignoring them, but when they become really personal using crude and offensive language i find that hard to do.


That's when I hit the report button. If it's not really a reportable offense, I just ignore usually.
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Feb 5, 2008 10:28 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
lola36
lola36lola36dublin, Dublin Ireland130 Threads 5,563 Posts
trish123: There have been a few abusive posts in the last few days and months - how do you think it best to deal with these posters?

My favourite is to ignore them and not let them have a negative reaction on the forum at all.

Thanks to Dizzy Di who is on the phone and helped with these options.


Hi honey how are you doing???? Hope all is wellteddybear

Ps:ignore all the bastards....Lolwink hug
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Feb 5, 2008 10:29 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
trish123
trish123trish123Macclesfield, Cheshire, England UK231 Threads 6 Polls 19,911 Posts
Scottishlass: I think ignoring them is the best way myself. Responding even in a negative just feeds their need for attention.


thumbs up yup, no response whatsoever is what I think thumbs up
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Feb 5, 2008 10:30 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
trish123
trish123trish123Macclesfield, Cheshire, England UK231 Threads 6 Polls 19,911 Posts
lola36: Hi honey how are you doing???? Hope all is well

Ps:ignore all the bastards....Lol



laugh Hiya Hun - am good thanks, hope you are too hug hug

yup, ignore the bs**rds rolling on the floor laughing
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Feb 5, 2008 10:31 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
lola36
lola36lola36dublin, Dublin Ireland130 Threads 5,563 Posts
trish123: Hiya Hun - am good thanks, hope you are too

yup, ignore the bs**rds


wink hug kiss
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Feb 5, 2008 10:32 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
prncss4someone
prncss4someoneprncss4someoneHopeful, Michigan USA66 Threads 9 Polls 9,743 Posts
boxing dancing dog boxing dancing dog boxing dancing dog punch then duck then punch then duck...or ignore the boring yawn

no handbook on how to deal with them, just depends on the mood dunno sometimes teddybear works....
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Feb 5, 2008 10:33 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
Zellarrone1
Zellarrone1Zellarrone1Hull, East Riding of Yorkshire, England UK37 Threads 5 Polls 10,047 Posts
I totally ignore them, stay out of their threads and don't reply to any of their posts and don't even answer any messages or flowers they send me and that goes forall the people I can't stand on here.

Also, I have a piece on my profile explaining why I ignore them cool
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Feb 5, 2008 10:34 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
innocentkid
innocentkidinnocentkidcolombo, Western Sri Lanka1 Polls 76 Posts
trish123: There have been a few abusive posts in the last few days and months - how do you think it best to deal with these posters?

My favourite is to ignore them and not let them have a negative reaction on the forum at all.

Thanks to Dizzy Di who is on the phone and helped with these options.



thumbs up 100%thumbs up wine
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Feb 5, 2008 10:34 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
trish123
trish123trish123Macclesfield, Cheshire, England UK231 Threads 6 Polls 19,911 Posts
alabamabebe: That's when I hit the report button. If it's not really a reportable offense, I just ignore usually.


it just feeds their abuse if we respond in any way i reckon - reporting is an option I save for when Im really, really annoyed with em and nobody else is ignoring - I think it would be pretty amusing if we could all simply ignore grin
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Feb 5, 2008 10:37 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
jodigirlsfree
jodigirlsfreejodigirlsfreeConway, South Carolina USA50 Threads 2,300 Posts
they say ignorance is bliss



in these cases they are required......jmowave hug
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Feb 5, 2008 10:40 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
trish123
trish123trish123Macclesfield, Cheshire, England UK231 Threads 6 Polls 19,911 Posts
morganlee: your right! but i have failed miserably at doing that this afternoon!


I have at times too - its hard not to sometimes but if we are all singing from the same song sheet it shouldnt be too difficult dunno
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Feb 5, 2008 11:00 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
HealthyLiving
HealthyLivingHealthyLivingSomewhere In, Tennessee USA690 Threads 2 Polls 6,584 Posts
trish123: I have at times too - its hard not to sometimes but if we are all singing from the same song sheet it shouldnt be too difficult


Then we must all decide now, to agree not to be sucked in, to comment on the posts, no matter how inticing it may be. If no one responds, sure, it can work. But there will be those who do not come on often, or who do not realize what is going on, or new members, who will post anyway.
Hopefully folks will have enough wisdom to discern it and not respond. I have found that ignoring works great.

I would never want to retaliate negatively, but do as Trish has previously suggested and done, to send an encouraging, positive private email to the problem poster.

If all else fails and it continues... R E P O R T.

There are many problem people in the world. We do not know their circumstances. They may be reaching out for help and just do not know how to do it. We must always remember that no matter what we do, to handle it in love.

Good post Trish!
thumbs up
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Feb 5, 2008 11:08 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
Ambrose2007
Ambrose2007Ambrose2007BFE, South Dakota USA110 Threads 17 Polls 14,069 Posts
Ignore.thumbs up
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Feb 5, 2008 11:13 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
morganlee
morganleemorganleeQawra, Majjistral Malta32 Threads 1 Polls 7,360 Posts
They may be reaching out for help and just do not know how to do it. We must always remember that no matter what we do, to handle it in love. The person that is getting to me is right now going on every thread that another person is posting on and making derogatory comments about them, they have been reported and nothing is done, this i can't understand. I don't believe this person is calling out for help, and they have been asked politely to stop, but still they continue. All i can feel is disduist and contempt at there continually behaviour !!frustrated

Thank you all i feel better after that little vent.
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Feb 5, 2008 11:17 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
DizzyDi
DizzyDiDizzyDiLancashire, England UK40 Threads 1 Polls 2,432 Posts
good to see that you had a chance to vent

ignore them is what I sayteddybear
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Feb 5, 2008 11:30 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
trish123
trish123trish123Macclesfield, Cheshire, England UK231 Threads 6 Polls 19,911 Posts
HealthyLiving:
There are many problem people in the world. We do not know their circumstances. They may be reaching out for help and just do not know how to do it. We must always remember that no matter what we do, to handle it in love.

Good post Trish!


Thanks HL, i do agree, it isnt always easy to spot the ones who are reaching out but I think we are a pretty discerning and caring bunch of people on here - which is basically what makes an inconsiderate person stand out like a sore thumb.

The odd careless remark can be put down to an oversight or stress, whatever, but when it becomes apparent from everything they post that they have it in for a group or a person then it just upsets the equilibrium of the whole.

We dont need it and we dont want it - we come here for a mostly pleasant environment with differences of opinion discussed in an intelligent adult manner.

if they dont want to play the game then sending them to coventry seems like a good idea - if they then want to stick around they will know that the standards we encourage and maintain here are not those of the gutter.

I feel a bit like Im encouraging mob rule here but really, I think its about protecting ourselves from the un-needed stress.

This is a great community and Ive grown really fond of a lot of people here - we dont need the stress - simple as
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Feb 5, 2008 11:41 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
trish123
trish123trish123Macclesfield, Cheshire, England UK231 Threads 6 Polls 19,911 Posts
morganlee: They may be reaching out for help and just do not know how to do it. We must always remember that no matter what we do, to handle it in love. The person that is getting to me is right now going on every thread that another person is posting on and making derogatory comments about them, they have been reported and nothing is done, this i can't understand. I don't believe this person is calling out for help, and they have been asked politely to stop, but still they continue. All i can feel is disduist and contempt at there continually behaviour !!

Thank you all i feel better after that little vent.


I agree and hope you feel better for venting - thats why I just had to do the thread too - but it has been coming on for months - i do like the polls feature thumbs up
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Feb 5, 2008 11:45 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
morganlee
morganleemorganleeQawra, Majjistral Malta32 Threads 1 Polls 7,360 Posts
trish123: I agree and hope you feel better for venting - thats why I just had to do the thread too - but it has been coming on for months - i do like the polls feature
ell having the chance to vent here stopped me responding again so thanks hug thing i need it as a permanent option !! now that is worrying!!wine
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Feb 5, 2008 11:46 AM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
arabella
arabellaarabellaNear Farmington, Maine USA110 Threads 2 Polls 7,814 Posts
In some cases, reporting doesn't work..

The forum rules say that we should report, but why bother if it falls on deaf ears laugh

So we ignore, we don't argue, we don't post on threads that are purposely provocative and we never rise to the bait of insult cheers

yawn
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Feb 5, 2008 12:00 PM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
DizzyDi
DizzyDiDizzyDiLancashire, England UK40 Threads 1 Polls 2,432 Posts
arabella: In some cases, reporting doesn't work..

The forum rules say that we should report, but why bother if it falls on deaf ears

So we ignore, we don't argue, we don't post on threads that are purposely provocative and we never rise to the bait of insult



But we do have to try to comply by the rulesprofessor professor

if all else fails ignore them or give them both barrelscheers
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Feb 5, 2008 12:07 PM CST Whats the best way to deal with abusive posters?
schmorbraten
schmorbratenschmorbratenCologne, Nordrhein-Westfalen Germany40 Threads 1,953 Posts
create a section for manics,
a room for those that like verbal racketball...lol
sometimes if both sides have permission to cut loose, heh heh well ,
it could be entertaining if you like dark humourdevil
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Message #318

Stats for this Poll

328 Votes
5,418 Views
144 Comments
in Advice
Created: Feb 2008
Last Viewed: Sep 18
Last Commented: Mar 2008
Last Voted: Jul 2017

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