Ok, so this is how it is going to work. I will begin a story, then have some options for continuing that story, in other words, the story will continue based upon the most popular selection that is listed. All you have to do is read what I have written and make a selection. I will wait three days to allow for voting, then write the next part of the story using another poll until the story loses interest, comes to a conclusion, I get tired, or I run out of time lol.
So, with that said, lets begin.
Sam Holdings, a renowned treasure hunter, sat in his office going over his daily emails. And as he did, he came across one that automatically caught his eye. It was from a lady who simply identified herself as Mary.
At first, before opening it, he thought she was just another scammer of sorts trying to get a hold of his holdings, but as he read the email he became less and less convince that this was so.
Inside the email he found a phone number, an out of state address, and a roundtrip airline ticket.
rytcharlieprovincia di Lodi, Lombardy Italy1,412 posts
not a bad piece ... can I give you a little feedback?
Just my opinions ..
- what are daily emails? - it might be better to say something like 'that day's emails'
- 'automatically' is possibly not the best word here - to instantly catch the eye could be more natural.
- instead of identified herself as Mary - might it be better to say that the email had simply been signed 'Mary' ?
- get a hold of his holdings sounds clumsy to me.
- I'm not sure we uaually speak of things being inside an email - why don't you say that the email mentioned or contained a phone number and an address, and had a ticket attached to it?
Costapacketparis, Centre-Val de Loire France2,182 posts
cherrybrandy: thats some good imagination... what happened to the poor,delusional girl after that?
The poor delusional Cherry broke both her legs carrying Costa up the stairs, Costa with a heart of gold gave her what she yearned for there on the stairs. After they had finished their sweaty tanglement Costa send her crawlling down to the fridge for a beer...
rytcharlie: not a bad piece ... can I give you a little feedback?
Just my opinions ..
- what are daily emails? - it might be better to say something like 'that day's emails'
- 'automatically' is possibly not the best word here - to instantly catch the eye could be more natural.
- instead of identified herself as Mary - might it be better to say that the email had simply been signed 'Mary' ?
- get a hold of his holdings sounds clumsy to me.
- I'm not sure we uaually speak of things being inside an email - why don't you say that the email mentioned or contained a phone number and an address, and had a ticket attached to it?
Boban1: and what the hell happened with tracy????....
What happen? She isn't in the story yet, but later maybe when we have a romantic scene, to put it nicely. Speak of romantic scenes, I'm casting right now. Cherry, you want to try out for the part? (:
cherrybrandycambridge, Cambridgeshire, England UK7,473 posts
Joseph_Mack: What happen? She isn't in the story yet, but later maybe when we have a romantic scene, to put it nicely. Speak of romantic scenes, I'm casting right now. Cherry, you want to try out for the part? (:
if its the ho'e part,im hopeless... the poor nymph,carring Costa around-no chance in hell.... i can try some sofisticated,tragic female character...mysterious and slightly dangerous....
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Interactive story: Part One.(Vote Below)
So, with that said, lets begin.
Sam Holdings, a renowned treasure hunter, sat in his office going over his daily emails. And as he did, he came across one that automatically caught his eye. It was from a lady who simply identified herself as Mary.
At first, before opening it, he thought she was just another scammer of sorts trying to get a hold of his holdings, but as he read the email he became less and less convince that this was so.
Inside the email he found a phone number, an out of state address, and a roundtrip airline ticket.
What does he do next?