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Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions. ( Archived) (44)

Apr 8, 2008 4:45 PM CSTAdjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana, USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts

Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.(Vote Below)

- (To Vote: select an option above, then press this button)
I got a feel for the personalities, then joined in
12
16%
I jumped in both feet first
22
29%
Who cares, it's just the internet
7
9%
I lurked for a long time
6
8%
I don't think I fit in well
6
8%
I hate everyone anyway, who cares
4
5%
The forums are loads of fun
4
5%
I had friends bring me into the forums
2
3%
I already knew people from other sites
0
0%
Any two or more of the above
14
18%
Total Votes
77
First... let's all vote.
beer
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Apr 8, 2008 4:45 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts
First... let's all vote.
beer
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Apr 8, 2008 4:47 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts
With all the new people come tons of personalities, from all around the world.
People come & go, over & over again...
so here's a thread where we can share our stories about how we adjusted to the CS forums, where newbies can ask questions, where sagely advice can be given to help others learn how to more comfortably settle into the CS forums.


All are welcome.
Please be kind.
If there is a trouble maker, please ignore them
(I will try to do the same).



Add your advice or story so that others might learn how to enter into the forums & enjoy the social fun.

wave
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Apr 8, 2008 4:47 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
kidatheart
kidatheartkidatheartFruitvale, British Columbia Canada33 Threads 24,896 Posts
Just plain ol' curiousity.wave
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Apr 8, 2008 4:48 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts
kidatheart: Just plain ol' curiosity.


Curiosity is always welcome.
hug
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Apr 8, 2008 4:49 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
Detente
DetenteDetenteNorth West, England UK67 Threads 4 Polls 3,793 Posts
I took my time...read some of the threads and found myself wanting to contribute.

I was welcomed very warmly, which helped immensely.grin
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Apr 8, 2008 5:12 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts
Let's start with a few basic suggestions for the new people:

1) Please learn to be patient.
Everyone here is on their own schedule, their own time zone & attending to their own business.
If you demand responses, attention, or answers... you're more likely to get ignored.


2) Take your time & observe the personalities at work.
Try to get to know who the regulars are, learn who is & isn't serious in nature... try to get a grasp on the different senses of humor(there are soooooo many at work on any given day).
Some CSers are more serious in nature, some more playful.


3) Make an introduction.
Let people know that you are new. With the masses of people who come through this site, some who never post in the forums, it's hard to tell who's been around & who's new. Say Hello & you will find warm welcoming messages will greeting you.


4) Stay out of conflicts.
This is hard to do sometimes, we all know. As with life outside the forums, there are alway bullies, con artists, comedians, and sassy people... some live to see people upset, some are simply being playful.
If you feel like you are being pulled into a conflict, try your best to ignore the source. By ignoring problems, the person responsible will have no one to play with... and hopefully go away.
If they become a serious problem, the mods will be informed & step in to handle things.


5) Be considerate of the feelings of the people around you.
If you think you've accidentally upset someone, simply apologize for the misunderstanding & move on.
If someone asks you to stop doing a certain behavior, please respect their wishes & leave them alone.
~Please do not nag, harry, harass, annoy, pester, badger, provoke, torment, hound, irk, vex, distress or upset the locals for your amusement.


6) Join in the discussion by adding to it.
Share your story, your beliefs, your poetry, your ideas & your humor. Not everyone will share your point of view & that's fine... just except them for who they are & be grateful for the opportunity to openly exchange your thoughts.


7) Try to follow the rules that CS has gone to the trouble of creating for us.
Yeah yeah, we all slip a bit here & there... but in general, we stick to the written policy.


~~~
Feel free to add your thoughts & suggestions to help the newbies out.
wave


...and Welcome everyone!
teddybear
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Apr 8, 2008 5:13 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts
Detente: I took my time...read some of the threads and found myself wanting to contribute.

I was welcomed very warmly, which helped immensely.


...and we were thrilled to have another intelligent mind in the mix.
hug
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Apr 8, 2008 5:26 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts
Clarabo19 in "Do we scare people off..." thread: Seen a mention of divides... no one is ever going to be happy, jeezo with the amount of people on this site it is impossible. Its hard enough trying to get 100 people in a work to agree on a pub for the monthly works night out!! The musics too loud/too quiet/drinks are too expensive/its not 'their' kind of people.... same with forums really isnt it? You either go with the flow or you take a step back or i suppose in forums you put your tuppence worth in.


I found this was a particularly accurate comment.
It nails it squarely on the head.

The forums of CS are not about kissing everyone butt or being everyone pal, it's about having a place where we can socialize, freely. Everyone of us has our own life & personality. One person may be stuffy & the other may be flirty & then there are those who simply observe....
All are welcome to be themselves here!
This site does not belong to any one of us... it's here for all of us to share.
Seldom will you find every single person here has 100% of what they want from this site.
That's life, we adapt.
thumbs up

(Kudos)
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Apr 8, 2008 5:41 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts
Aries01 from "Do we scare people off..." thread: People get different things out of the forums.. some like a good intelligent debate.. some like to discuss relationships and the like.. some banter relax and have a good laugh.. everyone to their own.. like in RL I guess...

What I get out of them differs in accordance with how I am feeling sometimes I just was a LARGE glass of wine and a giggle, sometimes I like a good discussion...

One thing I will say though is that I have never felt unwelcome in the chit chat threads.. they might have their own thing going on, but it is never to the exclusion of other.. not in my view anyway



This is the idea... this is how people should feel about our beloved little CS.
yay
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Apr 8, 2008 5:43 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
Hugz_n_Kissez
Hugz_n_KissezHugz_n_KissezSomeplace, Ontario Canada82 Threads 3 Polls 34,865 Posts
I read for about a month or so...guaged people's personalities and then jumped right in...although posting very little in the beginning!!!!!!!!!


wine
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Apr 8, 2008 5:50 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts
...And now the place just wouldn't be the same without you.
hug
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Apr 8, 2008 7:09 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
dcj22
dcj22dcj22Somewhere, Tennessee USA125 Threads 3 Polls 15,974 Posts
I read a few threads for a couple of days and then sent Driven and Indy emails complimenting their humor. They both advised me to jump right in.

So I did.
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Apr 8, 2008 7:10 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
dcj22
dcj22dcj22Somewhere, Tennessee USA125 Threads 3 Polls 15,974 Posts
Excellent suggestions you have posted, Spicey.

Hi, Sweetie.

bouquet
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Apr 8, 2008 7:11 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
KrazieStill
KrazieStillKrazieStillChardon, Ohio USA18 Threads 5,214 Posts
I learned everything from Leo two years ago and I'm still a newbie.

rolling on the floor laughing cheering
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Apr 8, 2008 7:19 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
Zarah
ZarahZarahdublin, Dublin Ireland34 Threads 2,178 Posts
I find it a solace after a difficult day of medical dramas.....
An interesting blend of cultures, personalities and collective points of view. I personally don't get dramatic about it all...the internet is just one thing in my life that I don't take seriously and a good thing to 'numb' out in front of.
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Apr 8, 2008 7:53 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
Indyfella
IndyfellaIndyfellaindianapolis, Indiana USA230 Threads 9 Polls 27,698 Posts
Hugz_n_Kissez: I read for about a month or so...guaged people's personalities and then jumped right in...although posting very little in the beginning!!!!!!!!!



Yes, those were the good old days...laugh
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Apr 8, 2008 7:56 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
lovebird4ya
lovebird4yalovebird4yadublin, Dublin Ireland22 Threads 7 Polls 172 Posts
spiceygamble: Let's start with a few basic suggestions for the new people:

1) Please learn to be patient.
Everyone here is on their own schedule, their own time zone & attending to their own business.
If you demand responses, attention, or answers... you're more likely to get ignored. 2) Take your time & observe the personalities at work.
Try to get to know who the regulars are, learn who is & isn't serious in nature... try to get a grasp on the different senses of humor(there are soooooo many at work on any given day).
Some CSers are more serious in nature, some more playful. 3) Make an introduction.
Let people know that you are new. With the masses of people who come through this site, some who never post in the forums, it's hard to tell who's been around & who's new. Say Hello & you will find warm welcoming messages will greeting you.4) Stay out of conflicts.
This is hard to do sometimes, we all know. As with life outside the forums, there are alway bullies, con artists, comedians, and sassy people... some live to see people upset, some are simply being playful.
If you feel like you are being pulled into a conflict, try your best to ignore the source. By ignoring problems, the person responsible will have no one to play with... and hopefully go away.
If they become a serious problem, the mods will be informed & step in to handle things.5) Be considerate of the feelings of the people around you.
If you think you've accidentally upset someone, simply apologize for the misunderstanding & move on.
If someone asks you to stop doing a certain behavior, please respect their wishes & leave them alone.
~Please do not nag, harry, harass, annoy, pester, badger, provoke, torment, hound, irk, vex, distress or upset the locals for your amusement. 6) Join in the discussion by adding to it.
Share your story, your beliefs, your poetry, your ideas & your humor. Not everyone will share your point of view & that's fine... just except them for who they are & be grateful for the opportunity to openly exchange your thoughts.7) Try to follow the rules that CS has gone to the trouble of creating for us.
Yeah yeah, we all slip a bit here & there... but in general, we stick to the written policy.~~~
Feel free to add your thoughts & suggestions to help the newbies out.
...and Welcome everyone!


send it to princess4some1rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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Apr 8, 2008 8:03 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
StarliteFantazy
StarliteFantazyStarliteFantazyFantazyLand, Missouri USA37 Threads 3 Polls 4,307 Posts
spiceygamble: Let's start with a few basic suggestions for the new people:

1) Please learn to be patient.
Everyone here is on their own schedule, their own time zone & attending to their own business.
If you demand responses, attention, or answers... you're more likely to get ignored. 2) Take your time & observe the personalities at work.
Try to get to know who the regulars are, learn who is & isn't serious in nature... try to get a grasp on the different senses of humor(there are soooooo many at work on any given day).
Some CSers are more serious in nature, some more playful. 3) Make an introduction.
Let people know that you are new. With the masses of people who come through this site, some who never post in the forums, it's hard to tell who's been around & who's new. Say Hello & you will find warm welcoming messages will greeting you.4) Stay out of conflicts.
This is hard to do sometimes, we all know. As with life outside the forums, there are alway bullies, con artists, comedians, and sassy people... some live to see people upset, some are simply being playful.
If you feel like you are being pulled into a conflict, try your best to ignore the source. By ignoring problems, the person responsible will have no one to play with... and hopefully go away.
If they become a serious problem, the mods will be informed & step in to handle things.5) Be considerate of the feelings of the people around you.
If you think you've accidentally upset someone, simply apologize for the misunderstanding & move on.
If someone asks you to stop doing a certain behavior, please respect their wishes & leave them alone.
~Please do not nag, harry, harass, annoy, pester, badger, provoke, torment, hound, irk, vex, distress or upset the locals for your amusement. 6) Join in the discussion by adding to it.
Share your story, your beliefs, your poetry, your ideas & your humor. Not everyone will share your point of view & that's fine... just except them for who they are & be grateful for the opportunity to openly exchange your thoughts.7) Try to follow the rules that CS has gone to the trouble of creating for us.
Yeah yeah, we all slip a bit here & there... but in general, we stick to the written policy.~~~
Feel free to add your thoughts & suggestions to help the newbies out.
...and Welcome everyone!




oh wise spicey where were you when i joined??????hug teddybear
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Apr 8, 2008 8:06 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
StarliteFantazy
StarliteFantazyStarliteFantazyFantazyLand, Missouri USA37 Threads 3 Polls 4,307 Posts
i actually found the site by accident.........read some posts.......found some really intelligent, witty people with a lot of good things to say and alot of heart showed thru

(it helped that claire and i clicked right away too .....gotta pick out the evil ones earlydevil )

now i come here to de-stress from work and RL........and to see what all my fav posters have to say!

hug teddybear
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Apr 9, 2008 3:43 AM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts
dcj22: Excellent suggestions you have posted, Spicey.

Hi, Sweetie.


Thank you DCJ.
blushing

I, for one, am thrilled you became part of the CS family.
Your wit, your company, your friendship... I treasure them all.
hug


teddybear
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Apr 9, 2008 3:45 AM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts
Zarah: I find it a solace after a difficult day of medical dramas.....
An interesting blend of cultures, personalities and collective points of view. I personally don't get dramatic about it all...the internet is just one thing in my life that I don't take seriously and a good thing to 'numb' out in front of.


...and yours is another point of view worth having.
grin thumbs up
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Apr 9, 2008 3:46 AM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts
StarliteFantazy: oh wise spicey where were you when i joined??????


I must have been in one of my quiet modes... oh, do forgive me.
laugh

*luvluv...
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Apr 9, 2008 4:02 AM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
nuala
nualanualadublin, Dublin Ireland12 Threads 8,806 Posts
spiceygamble: I must have been in one of my quiet modes... oh, do forgive me.


*luvluv...


I have to thank the forums as that is how Jim and myself got talking.....and we are still going strong.....yay

Morning Spicey......hug teddybear
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Apr 9, 2008 5:06 AM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
bajanblue
bajanbluebajanblueSpeightstown, Saint Peter Barbados388 Threads 1 Polls 4,670 Posts
I came across the site by accident, read the forum posts, saw the poetry heading and joined.

I tend to read through what I post a couple of times (and I still miss typos!) before hitting submit.

I try to stay away from statements that are directed at specific segments of the community "people who..."

I wish more care was exercised in using "they and them" in posts it moves comments to the personal about posters rather than addressing the topic.

I feel the current extravagant feelings about incidental chit chat are just that. Extravagant. There is a huge difference between a diversion for a couple of posts and a hi jack which goes on for pages. I also feel it is unrealistic to expect that I will understand the same thing from a topic that anyone else does. Some apparent deviations from topic are actually just a novel or unexpected interpretation.

Not wrong, not right, just different. Like everybody here.wave
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Apr 9, 2008 5:11 AM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
riyablossom
riyablossomriyablossomsomewhere, Pennsylvania USA201 Threads 21 Polls 13,583 Posts
bajanblue: I came across the site by accident, read the forum posts, saw the poetry heading and joined.

I tend to read through what I post a couple of times (and I still miss typos!) before hitting submit.

I try to stay away from statements that are directed at specific segments of the community "people who..."

I wish more care was exercised in using "they and them" in posts it moves comments to the personal about posters rather than addressing the topic.

I feel the current extravagant feelings about incidental chit chat are just that. Extravagant. There is a huge difference between a diversion for a couple of posts and a hi jack which goes on for pages. I also feel it is unrealistic to expect that I will understand the same thing from a topic that anyone else does. Some apparent deviations from topic are actually just a novel or unexpected interpretation.

Not wrong, not right, just different. Like everybody here.


thumbs up
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Apr 9, 2008 5:16 AM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
riyablossom
riyablossomriyablossomsomewhere, Pennsylvania USA201 Threads 21 Polls 13,583 Posts
As i have mentioned before, I joined this place by a friend's suggestion. Liked it here and have been around.

Initially i did an intro thread and started posting. Slowly, I learnt how to be around here and its been a journey from then.

Suggestions ? I think i find getting personally abusive at others whoever does it to anyone distasteful.

And all the complaints about cliques and chitchat. I would like to understand what is a clique ... you get along with few people.. you talk to them and have fun .. so the others find it clique-ish. So, it is our fault how others see it ? Not really. A clique is when others are not welcome in to the conversation.
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Apr 9, 2008 6:23 AM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
jaywill2013
jaywill2013jaywill2013San Francisco, California USA20 Threads 750 Posts
Try and be yourself jump right in....when out in public do you look for permission to speak...you be your self and those that find you worthy of talk and interest gravitate to you.....The same hesitation for respect and honor will most likely be mistaken for fear and shyness here...people tend to hold their opinions at arms length here...throwing them at you if you rub them them the wrong way...sound familiar???....Its just like RL in the way people respond to you with the one exception being that they tend to feel more comfortable putting you in your place here....Its easy to talk tough or hold your own opinions highest when one can't compensate for lack of having a voice to raise above yours should they feel the message is lacking a resounding wiff of reach and understanding....oh and then their virtue-angel buddies will gang up on you like those weak of soul chicken-shit fools who step in to sucker punch the kid who's loosing in a fight because he doesn't have anyone to back them up......

weakness is searching for weak people in order to find a lesser of mind to lift ones self up from the depth of winters depression or out of the darkness of summers shade....

come into the light good people this world is for all who have a pulse.....what happens from there is why it is interesting to be....at all.

wine
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Apr 9, 2008 3:14 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts
bajanblue: I came across the site by accident, read the forum posts, saw the poetry heading and joined.

I tend to read through what I post a couple of times (and I still miss typos!) before hitting submit.

I try to stay away from statements that are directed at specific segments of the community "people who..."

I wish more care was exercised in using "they and them" in posts it moves comments to the personal about posters rather than addressing the topic.

I feel the current extravagant feelings about incidental chit chat are just that. Extravagant. There is a huge difference between a diversion for a couple of posts and a hi jack which goes on for pages. I also feel it is unrealistic to expect that I will understand the same thing from a topic that anyone else does. Some apparent deviations from topic are actually just a novel or unexpected interpretation.

Not wrong, not right, just different. Like everybody here.


Excellent company you are.... typos & all. laugh
thumbs up

hug
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Apr 9, 2008 3:32 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts
riyablossom: As i have mentioned before, I joined this place by a friend's suggestion. Liked it here and have been around.

Initially i did an intro thread and started posting. Slowly, I learned how to be around here and its been a journey from then.

Suggestions ? I think i find getting personally abusive at others whoever does it to anyone distasteful.

And all the complaints about cliques and chitchat. I would like to understand what is a clique ... you get along with few people.. you talk to them and have fun .. so the others find it clique-ish. So, it is our fault how others see it ? Not really. A clique is when others are not welcome in to the conversation.


Riya,

you've exhibited excellent decorum in the threads from day one.
Sometimes, there are people who are going to lash out at others. It might simply be that they were never very pleasant to begin with, they might be very sad inside, they might be greatly misunderstood... or just plain lonely. No matter, they conduct them selves in a way that comes across very harshly.
This is where the differences start to show themselves in the threads. It's never enjoyable to find yourself targeted, yet it is very common. It seems like people will have to turn a blind eye to such things.
Often, there is a sad, lonely person who craves attention & choses to lash out in order to get it.
(wow, do a bunch of them come to mind)
The internet is a perfect place for them. They're protected & allowed to rant, all under the guises of their "opinions" being protected. The thing to keep in mind is that these are people who simply lose steam is left alone. They are digging for a reaction... and if given one, they explode into action. There numerous threads that prove that & we've lost some fantastic threads as a result of Mods having to remove the entire thing.
The Clique idea is very subjective. Those who complain about cliques often find they aren't being included. Now whether or not they really want to be included never really gets addressed, because once they begin complaining about it, instead of trying to join in, they've doomed themselves. One simply does NOT walk up to a baseball game and start screaming
..."YOU CLIQUISH BUNCH OF JOCKS! YOUR SO STUPID!". This is how such complaints are received.
For each person who has simply popped in & said "Oh HI, I'm new! My name is ....so&so..." they are the ones who find a warm welcome!

In short, how one chooses to introduce themselves & conduct themselves will determine how warmly they are received. There are so many different threads, with the right attitude, anyone can find something of interest here.
thumbs up
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Apr 9, 2008 3:35 PM CST Adjusting to the CS forums? A thread for suggestions & questions.
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts
jaywill2013: Try and be yourself jump right in....when out in public do you look for permission to speak...you be your self and those that find you worthy of talk and interest gravitate to you.....The same hesitation for respect and honor will most likely be mistaken for fear and shyness here...people tend to hold their opinions at arms length here...throwing them at you if you rub them them the wrong way...sound familiar???....Its just like RL in the way people respond to you with the one exception being that they tend to feel more comfortable putting you in your place here....Its easy to talk tough or hold your own opinions highest when one can't compensate for lack of having a voice to raise above yours should they feel the message is lacking a resounding wiff of reach and understanding....oh and then their virtue-angel buddies will gang up on you like those weak of soul chicken-shit fools who step in to sucker punch the kid who's loosing in a fight because he doesn't have anyone to back them up......

weakness is searching for weak people in order to find a lesser of mind to lift ones self up from the depth of winters depression or out of the darkness of summers shade....

come into the light good people this world is for all who have a pulse.....what happens from there is why it is interesting to be....at all.


Right on the nose!
No need to get pulled into another person's issues.
applause thumbs up
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Message #318

Stats for this Poll

77 Votes
1,785 Views
44 Comments
by spiceygamble (3 Polls)
Created: Apr 2008
Last Viewed: Sep 17
Last Commented: Apr 2008
Last Voted: Jul 2017

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