Would you date someone who is homeless (43)

Aug 24, 2011 6:31 AM CST Would you date someone who is homeless
Phoenix
PhoenixPhoenixBelfast....., Antrim Ireland274 Threads 65 Polls 6,948 Posts
Maisie: I've got to agree with Phoenix.

Gussi your whole post came across as very mean spirited and uncalled for. Phoenix posted months ago that his possessions were stored somewhere and he'd lost them so it was obvious he didn't have a settled home therefore I don't think he was particularly trying to hide anything.


Thanks Masie...bouquet
Aug 24, 2011 8:08 AM CST Would you date someone who is homeless
lifeisadream
lifeisadreamlifeisadreamMexi Go, Mexico State Mexico156 Threads 20 Polls 16,713 Posts
Not to have a home must be terrible and difficult to live on but things change and people get on their feet and continue living.

What for, pointing out that someone has less property than any other person?

It is better to be homeless than heartless.

coffee
Aug 24, 2011 8:40 AM CST Would you date someone who is homeless
Tulefel
TulefelTulefelGöteborg, Vastra Gotaland Sweden24 Threads 1 Polls 2,848 Posts
In response to: In a nutshell thats what homeless means....it could happen to anyone here for any one of a number of reasons...


That’s true. As they say in Russia: “Disregard not, people, poverty, war, prison and Mumu’s fate…”

In response to: Doesn't mean they have mental health, drug or other issues...simply means at that time in their life they've no roof over their head or front door key in their pocket...


No, it doesn’t automatically mean mental health problem or addiction, but nonetheless there’s a reason, at least one, why they are homeless. You never named your reasons for being homeless, but I would guess it’s not “simply no roof over your head just at that short time”, there surely was a chain of events that led to your homelessness. Something you couldn’t handle, some wrong decisions you made, few poor choices, inflexibility, nonchalance, infantile attitude to matters that matter… something like that. And it’s those qualities that make other people, especially women, to give you wider berth.

In response to: Can someone enlighten me?


And besides being homeless, you have proclaimed, more than once actually and rather loudly, that you are in a relationship. Why do you expect someone to wish date a person that is in a relationship? Is it ok for you to be in a relationship and keep dating others at the same time?

laugh
Aug 24, 2011 11:20 AM CST Would you date someone who is homeless
KemChi
KemChiKemChiKotka, Southern Finland Finland2 Threads 1 Polls 58 Posts
I agree with Tulefel.

One of the things I look for in a guy is that he can take care of himself financially. If I can take care of myself and he can take care of himself before the relationship, then chances are good we can make it financially after. I don't need rich, but head above water. I also wouldn't date someone who didn't have a job. Which to my friends here in Finland sounds heartless, but Americans don't get the same social package Finns do...
Aug 24, 2011 12:21 PM CST Would you date someone who is homeless
Phoenix
PhoenixPhoenixBelfast....., Antrim Ireland274 Threads 65 Polls 6,948 Posts
KemChi: I agree with Tulefel.

...


I don't...I'll explain later in response to some of the points Tuffy made. At this moment I don't got time...
Aug 24, 2011 5:57 PM CST Would you date someone who is homeless
Phoenix
PhoenixPhoenixBelfast....., Antrim Ireland274 Threads 65 Polls 6,948 Posts
Tulefel: No, it doesn’t automatically mean mental health problem or addiction, but nonetheless there’s a reason, at least one, why they are homeless.


Simply because they haven't a roof over their head or a key in their pocket..Thats generally the reason someone becomes homeless (reasons for becoming are many and far reaching.Some people have been known to make themselves homeless again for many far reaching reasons.)

Tulefel: You never named your reasons for being homeless, but I would guess it’s not “simply no roof over your head just at that short time”,there surely was a chain of events that led to your homelessness.


I have mentioned several times that I was homeless (All you had to do was read between the lines...)And as far as I know, only one person know's my reasons.(she's no longer on this site..)..And it's something along the lines of a thread smoky once had up...'Have you ever tried standing up for your rights...And when I rejoined this site as 'phoenix'...One of my first posts was about getting a phone call and then an email from my monsters ex head mistress telling me that my monsters were no longer at her school and she hasn't a clue were they are (I figured out very quickly where they went and why..<---I am totally innocent..<---nothing to do with me as to why the enemy went to where she went)

The chain of events is simply down to two women..and I powerless to stop it..There wasn't a thing I could do that led me to being homless. The Clash did a great version of a Bobby Fuller n° 'I fought the law...and at the minute Sarko's law is winning the battle but the Opera isn't over until the fat lady sings...(as I've said, one email-phone call and I could have fixed it)

Tulefel: Something you couldn’t handle, some wrong decisions you made, few poor choices, inflexibility, nonchalance, infantile attitude to matters that matter… something like that


Nahhh, way of the mark here...Everything that life has thrown at me I've taken on the chin and I've never taken one for the team. I'd like to say that letting the enemy into my life was a bad choice but it wasn't..She gave me the monsters..I'm that laid back in life that I'm almost horizontal..Anyone who has met me or talked to me privately will bear testement to that (outside of one person)...I guess the people who've met me in real life will say I can be a complete 'wing-nut, arlarse, divvy'.....<---English slang<---Google the words yourself. But to things that I hold close to me and matter to me (either people, projects, beliefs or others I don't mess around with)

Tulefel: And besides being homeless, you have proclaimed, more than once actually and rather loudly, that you are in a relationship. Why do you expect someone to wish date a person that is in a relationship? Is it ok for you to be in a relationship and keep dating others at the same time?


Thats right...While I was homeless I was in a relationship. And a lot of people long before you signed up here probably remember me calling her 'Brainspace'<---She's very good at that .And I consider her a mucker<--another word for you to Google..Several good ladies have also said they'd date a homless person, guess it horses for courses... On your point about why would expect someone to date a homeless person...Guess thats up to the indivuals..Why do you date men? And it's a big NO, NO to be in two relationshiops at the same time..(unless of course the couple have set the ground rules out first...)

Tell you what I did learn about being homeless for a while was something these two singers sang about (I would from time to time post the videos and make a comment about them )What Merle kinda meant when sang about taking pride in yourself no matter what the odds or reasons



I really understand what Kris sang about in this classic............
Aug 24, 2011 7:13 PM CST Would you date someone who is homeless
Tulefel
TulefelTulefelGöteborg, Vastra Gotaland Sweden24 Threads 1 Polls 2,848 Posts
<On your point about why would expect someone to date a homeless person...Guess thats up to the indivuals..Why do you date men? And it's a big NO, NO to be in two relationshiops at the same time..(unless of course the couple have set the ground rules out first...)>

(My version of this site refuses sometimes to quote, don’t know why.)

To Pheonix:
Read and re-read your post, and couldn’t understand it. (Not that I expected to laugh ) After all, English is your native, and you could make your understood if you wanted.

I won’t google slang, not interested: I have no use for it in my work and I don’t plan any visit to Ulster. I also am not an archeologist, so your referring to ancient times before me has no point in it. yawn

That settled, let’s me remind you that it were you who asked the question, and I was just trying to answer it from my point of view. It’s not me whom you have to convince that it’s ok for a handsome and witty homeless man to date two (or even more) women at the same time, it’s those who you want to date.

comfort
Aug 25, 2011 12:17 AM CST Would you date someone who is homeless
KemChi
KemChiKemChiKotka, Southern Finland Finland2 Threads 1 Polls 58 Posts
I don't think anyone is saying that homeless people can't be nice. And I don't think it is fair to insinuate that people who date them are not nice. I also acknowledge that Phoenix is the Veteran around here and I respect that you have more online dating experience.

As a single mom, time was precious to me. There are a LOT of guys out there for dating. I used the job rule as a way to eliminate a bunch from the dating pool. The homeless thing never came up.

I know that not all people in prison are guilty, but I still think we need some kind of system to protect society. I am sure there are lovely, sane, financially stable homeless people out there. But statistics show these are not the norm.

I also never dated men who had children. As I had a child of my own and didn't want the complication that came with...including taking attention away from raising my own daughter. I don't think that all men with children are bad people, just in a different place in life than I needed. Now that my daughter is raised and on her own, I have started dating men with children.

We all have our own criteria for a mate. As life changes our criteria changes. I can't imagine anytime soon when I would be willing to date a homeless person, but I suppose it could happen. But for now, I am not interested.

I respect that Phoenix had some bad life experiences but was able to continue dating. If I dated someone and they then became homeless, that is a different kettle of fish. If I loved someone I would stick by them. I would invite them into my home, and then they wouldn't be considered homeless, would they?

I respect Tulefel's thoughts. She has way of expressing complicated ideas. Or at least I seem to understand what she is saying!
Aug 25, 2011 8:47 AM CST Would you date someone who is homeless
Tulefel
TulefelTulefelGöteborg, Vastra Gotaland Sweden24 Threads 1 Polls 2,848 Posts
KemChi: I don't think anyone is saying that homeless people can't be nice. And I don't think it is fair to insinuate that people who date them are not nice. I also acknowledge that Phoenix is the Veteran around here and I respect that you have more online dating experience.

As a single mom, time was precious to me. There are a LOT of guys out there for dating. I used the job rule as a way to eliminate a bunch from the dating pool. The homeless thing never came up.

I know that not all people in prison are guilty, but I still think we need some kind of system to protect society. I am sure there are lovely, sane, financially stable homeless people out there. But statistics show these are not the norm.

I also never dated men who had children. As I had a child of my own and didn't want the complication that came with...including taking attention away from raising my own daughter. I don't think that all men with children are bad people, just in a different place in life than I needed. Now that my daughter is raised and on her own, I have started dating men with children.

We all have our own criteria for a mate. As life changes our criteria changes. I can't imagine anytime soon when I would be willing to date a homeless person, but I suppose it could happen. But for now, I am not interested.

I respect that Phoenix had some bad life experiences but was able to continue dating. If I dated someone and they then became homeless, that is a different kettle of fish. If I loved someone I would stick by them. I would invite them into my home, and then they wouldn't be considered homeless, would they?

I respect Tulefel's thoughts. She has way of expressing complicated ideas. Or at least I seem to understand what she is saying!


wave

Certainly everyone has their selection criteria and preferences. And as response on this thread shown, homelessness isn’t everybody’s first choice. Not a wonder: homelessness means additional trouble as a general rule, and who would want to add someone else’s troubles to their own?
Aug 25, 2011 11:21 AM CST Would you date someone who is homeless
Phoenix
PhoenixPhoenixBelfast....., Antrim Ireland274 Threads 65 Polls 6,948 Posts
Tulefel:

(My version of this site refuses sometimes to quote, don’t know why.)


My version, your version and everyones else's is exactly the same...I'd hazzard a guess and say some people are more computer literate than others...(trust me this site to get around it is wee buns...)

Tulefel: To Pheonix:
Read and re-read your post, and couldn’t understand it. (Not that I expected to ) After all, English is your native, and you could make your understood if you wanted.


I have a very good command of the english language...And what I posted above is very easily to understand...

Tulefel: I won’t google slang, not interested: I have no use for it in my work and I don’t plan any visit to Ulster. I also am not an archeologist, so your referring to ancient times before me has no point in it.


Two of the three words I used are from the UK mainland not the Emerald Isle or any part of it...(They are from the city of Liverpool...) And as you know when using your native language (If I recall it's some dialect of Russian...) you don't always use correct speech but 'slang'...<----it's a good way to learn what people are saying...Sarkoland land is a classic case...because spoken french isn't the same as written..

Tulefel: That settled, let’s me remind you that it were you who asked the question, and I was just trying to answer it from my point of view. It’s not me whom you have to convince that it’s ok for a handsome and witty homeless man to date two (or even more) women at the same time, it’s those who you want to date.


Please...I'm just not handsome but DEVILISHLY HANDSOME...(handsome is plain and dull)...I'm not trying to convince any one in the merits or otherwise of dating a homless person, simply asking the good folk here on their views on the subject.

Tuffy, if at anytime you don't understand what I've posted, simply say so and I'll put it in another way for you to understand...
Aug 25, 2011 2:31 PM CST Would you date someone who is homeless
Tulefel
TulefelTulefelGöteborg, Vastra Gotaland Sweden24 Threads 1 Polls 2,848 Posts
Phoenix: ...

Tuffy, if at anytime you don't understand what I've posted, simply say so and I'll put it in another way for you to understand...


That time was as good as any. Reminded me a line from Aksenov (don’t remember what book, perhaps “Dolce vita”):

“One moment more and I’ll fall in love with this town. The moment passed.”


As to the main theme… I’ve already told that I know of a couple of situations there people were homeless because of certain circumstances. Their explanations I found quite understandable, their attitudes – quite sound and they had a short-run realistic plans to change the circumstances. I wouldn’t discriminate those people on the basis of their homelessness. Otherwise – no, I wouldn’t date a homeless person.
Sep 2, 2011 1:29 AM CST Would you date someone who is homeless
twinself
twinselftwinself..., Majjistral Malta36 Threads 1,347 Posts
Hi people, I crawl out of the woodwork every now and again. Hope you're all well.....

As for the question: It would depend a LOT on the reasons for the said homelessness. If it was for reasons that were out of the person's control, and he's ACTUALLY doing something to fix it, I'd consider it.

If it's because of a lazy bum or addiction-related issues, it would be a definite NO!

Just my two cents. :)
Sep 2, 2011 6:23 AM CST Would you date someone who is homeless
Phoenix
PhoenixPhoenixBelfast....., Antrim Ireland274 Threads 65 Polls 6,948 Posts
twinself: Hi people, I crawl out of the woodwork every now and again. Hope you're all well.....

As for the question: It would depend a LOT on the reasons for the said homelessness. If it was for reasons that were out of the person's control, and he's ACTUALLY doing something to fix it, I'd consider it.

If it's because of a lazy bum or addiction-related issues, it would be a definite NO!

Just my two cents. :)


Thanks for the input Twinny and good to see you are still alive...
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