Krinka Blog Comments (84)

RE: Expectations. Part 1

To everyone...

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@Stargazer111

Geronimolion's The Peacemaker (the Nine) is form another - the Enneagram Test

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@Stargazer111

Here are the threads:

MBTI Personality Test


Enneagram Test


By the way, I scored Type 4 (7 points) and the next one is Type 2 (6 points) on the Enneagram Test. Later I read that it's not so usual for an ENFJ to have Type 4 on this test - Type 2 is more logical, but it happens with ambiverts (people who are somewhere in the middle between extroverts and introverts - I'm extrovert 53%, introvert 47%).

It is unusual to have 3 ENFJs at the same place. I rarely have the opportunity to meet one.

These tests are good and worth a little more reading about online - when you have the time.

Those were just the ideas about potential places to look for "international love". Otherwise, I've given up on that idea, myself - at least for now.

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@Geronimolion

You are not a dreamer!

I'm wondering if some INFJ is going to show up...

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@Stargazer111

Some people on CS forums did the test and got the results. Most of them aren't active on blogs, though. You can start a blog about it if you are interested to know.

Since you liked the test so much, here's one more for you:



This is also a very good one.

I was thinking about other options to meet someone (apart from dating sites, that are mostly useless) and thought about forums, too, but the problem with forums is - AGE. You almost never know the age of people posting. There are some very large forums, like Reddit, with hundreds of millions of members all around the world writing about any possible topic you can imagine - but you never know their age. It's similar on Quora, for example. That's a big problem when meeting someone. Even if people use their own photos (not avatars) it's sometimes hard to tell their age only from looking at someone's photo.

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@Stargazer111

I don't know why you cannot open the forum...

It is called "NF's Temperament Forum - The Dreamers" and this the correct link:



Maybe you should try from your PC?

Maybe it's a better place to search for a date than CS...

RE: Expectations. Part 1

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@Stargazer111

I'm not angry or anything.

But I did my share in chatting on your blog.

I really said all I had on topic, so I hope some other members will continue expressing their opinions.

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@Stargazer111

I have never exchanged any private messages with any of the participants of this blog. My blocking settings allow only rare people to contact me and I have no wish to interact with people from forums and blogs privately any more, after having some unpleasant and weird experiences (apart from several RARE nice people I've been in contact with for a while, none of whom has written anything here).

Being ''nice and polite'' on CS forums and blogs is often misunderstood and misused. I sometimes wonder where some people live if they think that ''nice and polite'' actually means ''weak and insecure''. It must be some very sad and lonely world...

I said all I had to say on this blog and this topic and I apologize if I wrote too much off topic and said something unpleasant or disturbing to others.

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@robbyreal

Maybe you are lucky and Akash is some incompatible personality type.

I even found some discussion board for the ''dreamers'':

RE: Expectations. Part 1

Deedee, welcome to the ''dreamers club''.

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@robbyreal

Really??? That's great!

ENFJ is not such a common type and male ENFJs are especially rare.

This blog is full of ''dreamers''.

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@Stargazer111

So, you are an INFP.

I had a feeling that you are one of the ''dreamers''.

I wonder if robby and Akash are, too.

The test is very good and accurate, isn't it?

I'm an ENFJ - The Protagonist

Of course, I let those men go. I'm not interested in such things. I'm now here for blogs and forums, actually, but I spend really way too much time here and maybe I should think about leaving or - at least - slowing down.

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@Stargazer111

Men looking for ''international love'' who contacted me via CS and were REAL people (and don't use CS blogs and forums) generally wanted ''international fun'' - some casual weekend romances that might end with one weekend or continue until both parties find it fun. They didn't mind coming here or me going there. Both options were OK for them. Of course, they never said this directly, but it was obvious from many many clues.

I read on the internet in many articles that most dating sites nowadays are actually full of people looking for something casual, not a serious relationship. So, my experiences aren't anything unusual.

I think that a person should look for ''international love'' (if that's what someone wants) on some other - more serious places - than dating sites.

I hope you have fun doing the test!

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@Stargazer111

A little off topic, but have you ever done the MBTI personality test? I wonder if you also belong to ''dreamers'' (NF). I'm an ENFJ myself.



I'm not sure if this is on topic or not, but I think that it's hard to meet someone on a dating site. When you join a dating site, the only thing you have in common with all those millions of others who joined the same site is that - you are all single (and even that sometimes is not true!). Finding someone you have something in common with is like looking for a needle in a haystack.

CS supposed to be a little different because of forums and blogs where people - at least theoretically - should easier meet someone they have something in common with, but - unfortunately - a very small number of CS members actually use them and many people misuse them, so in the end they are not especially useful for most people.

So far, men from blogs and forums who contacted me were suspicious and hid their identity much more than people who use CS as a dating site only. It's supposed to be the other way around, but it is not.

I'm too lazy to create a blog. I would have to read everyone's posts and reply to everyone. If I only sneak around other people's blogs, I can choose what to read and when to reply.

Somehow, this blog starts to make me feel disheartened. Maybe we should better avoid international dating after all?

RE: When You’re In Love With A Beautiful Woman.

Physical appearance isn't very important to me. It's the overall impression about someone that matters.

RE: 100%

@Bunyi888

I really like your blogs.

After spending some time on CS and reading different blogs and threads, I came to the same conclusion.

I think that being here was - after all - well-spent time.

RE: Looking at faces – making choices

@Bunyi888

I couldn't agree more.

I used to be a member of the forums in the past, where we used avatars only. I didn't exchange photos with some members prior to meeting them in person and was always pleasantly surprised.

I often thought of removing my profile photo, but I don't like the idea of having a blank profile. I hope they will allow using avatars in the future on CS.

RE: Bad Habits...

@Elegsabiff

I'm already weird enough asking for a plastic straw, taking my own re-usable straw out of my purse would be a little too much, I'm afraid.

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@Akash70

SORRY to know that you are an Aquarius?!

You don't deserve the reply.



@Stargazer111

The photo must have been made by a Pisces.

RE: "RAMBLIN MAN"..("RAMBLE ON")..(149)

@namaron

I've always thought we should talk more about love on CS than anything else.

Maybe if we don't give up, in the end we will find out what LOVE is.

RE: Bad Habits...

I always use a straw in cafes and restaurants, even when drinking coffee or water.

I'm also very lazy.

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@robbyreal

I agree with you.

Photos mean nothing. They are just a two-dimensional representation of someone. They have ''no soul''.

The overall impression is what really matters.

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@Akash70

I agree that there's no solution to stop being a romantic soul.

I also agree with your opinion regarding Stargazer's blogs. One of rare things that still keeps me here.

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@Stargazer111

''Special connections'' made online that continue offline into some wonderful romantic story are not that common. They do happen, but most of the time meeting such a person is very very difficult.

If you are a romantic soul searching for something special - you can very easily delude yourself online. You can see more than there is while chatting / talking to someone, just because you WANT it to be something special. Once you meet, you cannot keep living in an illusion and you feel as if your expectations haven't been met.

Maybe the real questions is - how to stop being such a romantic soul?

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@Stargazer111

''Recording messages'' is a new technology for me. I'm still not comfortable with it.

Well, it seems that it goes like this now - first chatting, then exchanging recorded messages and then having a phone call.

I never call a man - I wait until he calls me. I know, I know - I'm not a very modern woman.

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@Stargazer111

I HOPE to spend a pleasant couple of hours/a day/an evening in someone's company.

I don't EXPECT that any more, because I did meet some men online that seemed OK when we chatted -
but were a little different offline. For example, one was a very negative person who constantly criticized and judged everything and everyone and those couple of hours with him were tremendously exhausting and not very pleasant. I didn't have such an impression about him when we chatted. That's why I think it's better to have a phone call and a video chat prior to meeting someone. You at least get some kind of an idea what that person is like...

I definitely don't expect to fall in love at first sight, although it did happen to me. It's not impossible. But, I know it is rare.

So, I hope that we will like each other enough to go on a second date.

RE: Expectations. Part 1

@Stargazer111

I'm always tremendously nervous before the first phone call and video chat, too. Even if I record and send messages to someone in the beginning I do it like 20 times before sending one. Meeting in person is always somehow... strange - even on a friendly basis and much much more if you got to like the person online quite a bit.

It's confusing. As if I know the person, yet I meet the stranger at the same time. I suppose everyone feels the same...

RE: Expectations. Part 1

I'm not sure if I understood the question properly, but I let the man decide.

If we are in the same town, then he can decide what we are going to do - go for a walk, have a coffee or drink together, go for a meal, attend some event, go the cinema... I don't mind - everything is fine with me.

If he lives in another town/country and comes here to meet me - then I'm a hostess, he knows nothing about my town, so I have to be the one making suggestions. However, I would make a plan with him in advance and ask him whether he wants just to meet and sit in some quiet place and talk or he would prefer some sightseeing, etc. as well.

If I go to his town/country - then he's a host and he's the one organizing everything. I'm fine with whatever he decides.

This is how I behaved so far.

RE: Friends & Acquaintances

@Catfoot

I agree with everything said.