Con frequncia pienso con mucha nostalgia sobre las historias que hemos compartido. De vez en cuando estoy de trabajo o de conducción para cualqier lugar, fantaseo sobre cosas que quiero escribir. Pero, cuando estoy en frente de la computadora mía encuentro que la cosa ya se fue de mi mente. Y ahora aquí estoy escribiendo y no tengo ni puta idea de que trato decir. Solo quería hacer buena impresión a la muchacha encima. Y un día quiero tener ella ecima mi cuerpo escultural. Y si yo llego a lograr, seré un hombre dichoso.
I've always told my male friends that, "A girl can think up 100 reasons why she shouldn't sleep with you, but she can just as easily come up with 100 reasons why she did. It's up to you which guy you are going to be."
I saw this guy at work trying to double up some valve bars, you know, so he could have a longer lever. He was trying to open up this lo torc plug valve that was under pressure, so I went to help him. I grabbed the valve bar, gave it some muscle, and it opened. He says, "Man, I stood on that valve bar, and it still wouldn't move."
"Sometimes, it just takes brute strength and ignorance.", I said.
Then he tells me, "I can't help it I don't have big ol' ape arms like you!"
I took my little girl to the water park again yesterday. It was alot more crowded than the last time we went. While we were waiting in line on the tower for the giant waterslides, an itsy bitsy little boy said, "Excuse me sir." as he tried to push his way past.
"No, no, no, pardon me sir!", I answered, while cutting him off.
"I need to get by.", says the little guy.
"There's no way I'm letting you go in front of my girl.", I told him.
He looked me right in the eye, and said with complete confidence, as if he himself believed it to be true, "Actually, I'm a lifeguard."
So at work today, we had to stop for a while because as we were convoying equipment to the location, our route of travel was blocked by a huge tree that had fallen across the county road. We were there for a while waiting for a road crew to come clean it up.
We looked at the tree, talked about how big it was, talked about it's state of decay. We talked about if we could move it ourselves, if we should move it ourselves, and out of the blue I got the urge for Kung-Fu.
What?
You get Kung-Fu urges too Journal. You know you do!
I snapped a limb about as big around as my calf with a swift spinning side kick. It was pretty sweet. Then I eyed my next victim, and threw my powerful elbow of destruction.... Immediately I got this "I shouldn't have done that" feeling.
Do you ever get that feeling Journal?
Apparently, this was one of the limbs that the termites had decided to save for winter.
I should be asleep, but I keep thinking about love. You know how people ask all the time, "What is love?" Hell! That Haddaway guy asked us all about a billion times starting back in '93 I guess....
What is Love? Baby don't hurt me....don't hurt me...no more...
I'm single because I'm so ruggedly good looking, sharp witted, and popular, that most women are intimidated, and rather than confront their own insecurities, they just give up before anything gets started.
diogenes Forum Posts (4,761)
in your 
while you smack your 
transitive pictograph verbalizations!
Meeeeeeeeeee
RE: what men to avoid
Avoid men in public restrooms!seriously