I've recently been reading Osho's "being in love", and he makes an interesting point for polyamory, and promoting the idea of extra-marital affairs- being good for a relationship. While I see a certain logic in his reasoning, I personally can't envision the idea for myself- well not that I'm married, or ever have been- I even find it slightly disturbing. Perhaps its my own insecurity that can't allow me to accept the idea. For me, if a loved one were to love another man, I'd go a bit crazy with jealousy, and I'd probably end it right there- and be depressed for months. Are there any thoughts on the idea? If anybody is unfamiliar with Osho, google him, and polyamory- (I may be spelling that incorrectly) My current partner thinks its possible to be in-love with 2 people simultaneously. I personally don't believe that to be possible.
I have yet to meet a woman with a sense of direction. Mostly women seem confused. But when there is a special woman in your life....She makes your life very much different.
could be the weirdness is actually fear... fear of pain or sadness. somehow you correlate your current situation with difficulty maybe. I understand you completely. I've currently toppled into a relationship myself...and for the first time, maybe ever, the feelings I have are totally different from anything I've experienced. The only thing is, I suffered a horrible break-up about 2+ years ago now, that took me nearly that long to get over...it was the most difficult thing I'd ever experienced. The memory of that, and the idea that it could end in the same manner causes me similar feelings to what you may be going through. I have to fight pessimism and allow myself to enjoy the beautiful romantic situation I'm in...which is what I so wanted. Often, when we get weird, I think its related to some past pain... But love like anything, is a risk...we have to jump in and give the most of ourselves without fear...though some reservation is perhaps beneficial to the relationship. When I find myself getting weird, I try to ignore or fight the feeling, and turn it positive. Its worked so far, but part of me still fears the pain, and I often find myself fighting with the fact that I'm totally in love. There I go...I admit it...I'm in Love, damn it!
it shows the more emotional side of a person. they way they treat humanity. There is a great site that does free compatibility of venus signs. It seems that my ideal match (if I remember correctly is venus in Scorpio)
check out that ezine article I mentioned. I tend to agree. If you view love as a ¨feeling¨ then its bound to wane. thats my idea. Love has to be more than a feeling.
taurus man: they say that taureans are reliable, earthy, grass eating folk, whereas the pisceas are gentle dreamers, poets, and artistic types...sensitive and all. You may not prefer seafood...respect for your oceanic brethren. which one sounds like you?
in truth, I don´t think you can put too much weight in the sun sign...yes its important, however I think the venus aspect, and the ascendant are more important. For example, yes in many ways I´m capricorn,but I feel like my personality is much more in line with the fact that my Venus is in Pisces. By the way, I don´t know many fun loving aries... but hey...I´m sure they exist (somewhere)
fair enough. but feelings change day to day. You may be in love- or feeling in love one day- the next day feel a bit different. So if our actions constantly relied on our feelings....thats a difficult one.
For further info google, ¨the myth of love¨. there is an Ezine article that I found interesting. On par with the Road less travelled.
I ask the question, because, I find that my feelings change with whatever seems to be happening with my body, or chemical changes in my brain,, or whatever. Hence, If love were merely a feeling, it couldn´t possibly exist for a lifetime. It has to be ones dedication to commitment, right?
I don´t think this is a fair statement to make, by the way, seeing as you don´t know me. I do attempt to view people without preconcieved notions, or images. However, I´m saying that the idea of romantic love, and indeed most kinds of love in general, seem to me selfish. I do not say that I don´t believe in love. I do believe in love. But love without attachment seems to exclude romantic love, and I suppose I find that difficult to deal with.
hmm...again, I don´t pretend to have all the answers breeze. Its just that, unselfish love seems like the ideal. That is not attachment. But relationships....they seem selfish, in that its all about someones needs being met. and if those needs are not met, there are affairs, cheating, and the rest of it, right? For example, passion and romance. I agree that these things are necessary in a relationship, however, when this need cannot be met, for whatever reason (i.e. work, traveling, etc...) one of the partners may stray, and seek that element which is missing from their lives. Maybe you would agree that some people are just not up to that ideal of ¨true love¨. In my personal experience, love, especially when it involves a romantic relationship, is all about the individual. As for myself, I try to be giving and selfless in my relationships, but my partners tend to be ¨takers¨, and perhaps I´m selfish too, without realizing it. something I need to analyze fully. But a relationship in the ¨krishnamurti¨ sense, without ïmages. Without preconcieved ideas, and selfless, unconditional love. I suppose thats what I aspire too. But how do you ascend to this world, when your surrounded my the exact opposite.
its always interesting to meet people that think they have all the answers. I don´t, can´t...rather..pretend to know the answer to these questions. But generally everyone I meet seem to have the ¨definitative¨answer. Well, more power to you my man! BTW, I have a cousin in Zurich. Great place!
to elaborate on the love thing... isn´t love an attachment? I´m not talking about love of art or beauty, but even motherly love, or love for ones spouse. Now I´m coming from a buddhistic point of view here. Love for another human being seems, in a sense, selfish. I dunno...what do you think (people). ? That, according to what I understand about reincarnation, is a one way ticket back to this plane of existence. essentially, attachment.
the idea is that if you can´t leave the hospital, you´re cursed to return to this earth...basically until you get it right. dig? reincarnation. To answer dragons question. My family is from India- dads half german and indian, and my mom is from india. The name is actually arabic, and comes from my great gran-dad whose name was Imad ul-mulk, or some crazy thing like that. My ancestors actually come from the region now know as Irak, and Iran. My German side are from Frieburg, I believe. Legend goes that my great grandfather, on my dads side, was an opera singer. He was also and amateur painter. That we know for sure, as he left behind a legacy of mediocre art work! I was born in California.
not a bad idea. Well one idea which has been haunting (or was haunting me ) was the following. There is a well known hindu philosopher who stated that this world we live in is like a hospital. Inorder to get out, we must be cured. To be cured we must be free of attatchment. But does that mean we must give up love of another human being, for a greater, broader love of mankind? Giving up the sensual life seems an impossible task, and yet the suffering that we undergo here on earth....makes it seem essential. Of course all this talk is totally irrelevant if you don´t believe in anything beyond death. So, em...yeah. Anyway, should go eat... nighty night.
well let see...I was single up until a very short time ago. Ive actually been with this site ever since I came to Europe. In all honesty, I never believed these things can actually work. Well I can say they do. Why do I continue to hang out here, even though I´m seeing someone. Well, the answer may seem pretty pathetic. But here it goes: Habit. And I kinda enjoy meeting people from all over the place. Also, Unfortunately the region where I´m situated here in Spain doesn´t offer me much worthy conversation. I don´t really get on with most of the people here. I´m kinda a fish out of water. But hey....things are always changing and evolving, who knows where I´ll be a year from now. And I must correct you, we didn´t make love on the beach...we merely kissed. Big, Big difference. Would be philosopher. I guess that means I like to think about life, spirituality, that kinda thing. but I can´t really consider myself a legitimate one, because that would mean I´d have to have spent years studying the stuff, right? My lady friend is actually a teacher of philosophy, and we often discuss our ideas...We differ on the whole spirituality thing. You can´t like....prove it or whatever
wow, susie. It sounds to me you have a very rigid view of love, and trust. You trust someone, but you can't expect the impossible from someone you love. I think freedom, and trust, are what keep things going. And who said anything about being all "one soul"... does that come from buddhism? love is about selflessness, for me. Its not about expectation. Expectation actually kills love in my opinion.
just wanted to agree with dragon! There's gotta be hope for love. My parents for example: separated for 14 years. They got back together, and now they're more in love than ever. There are ups and downs- but I think the trick is to somehow keep the romance fires lit.
just wanted to agree with dragon! There's gotta be hope for love. My parents for example: separated for 14 years. They got back together, and now they're more in love than ever. There are ups and downs- but I think the trick is to somehow keep the romance fires lit.
ekspain Forum Posts (34)
it makes me cry. But good to meet you too!
RE: Great films
saw a wonderful Japanese anime film, very sad and moving: Tomb of the Fireflies.... great!Also a film by Mathieu Kasovits: La Haine- awesome....
New Batman was not bad..