RE: The lack of mature adults, both male and female as opposed to being adult in western society & why.

Jac, I'm aware of that. I know that my parents did their best and they did what they thought was best for us at the time - mightn't have been always 100%, but we survived and looking around, had a pretty idyllic childhood. What I do admire about my mum is that she reflected on the shitty behaviour of her own mum and deliberately had a very different relationship to her husband (and her children) than her own role models (without a lot of support btw.)

I was very close to the kids around home when they were growing up. I do know their parents did their best and what they though was right for their kids, but didn't take any suggestions from their grandparents and others on board.
Nevertheless, they and the kids got a lot of support from everyone at home. Things have settled a bit with the kids and I hope they will find their way in life. They will always have support not only from their parents, but other family members as well. If I criticise their parents it's not to slag them off, it is out of concern for the kids.

My partner has a toddler which spends a lot of time with us. He did a lot of reflecting on his own upbringing, what was good and what wasn't and applies this. He also takes advise on board and does a great job.

I still think that the main responsibility in raising kids lies with the parents. Yes, it doesn't come with a handbook. Problem is that a lot of today's messed up adults are the result of bad parenting and this will continue to be the case.

I simply do not wish that on any kid.

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RE: The lack of mature adults, both male and female as opposed to being adult in western society & why.

Maybe you haven't gotten one of the points I made.

Parents should be the ones guiding them into adulthood. When I look at the young adults in my family, the ones from a stable family, brought up with rules and obligations are well adjusted, happy and productive members of society. The ones where parents broke up, no one wanted to be the bad parent and say no but kissed their kids asses and didn't insist on rules and contribution workwise to the household etc. are the ones struggling. I think these kids will get a major shock when they join the workforce and see that they are not the centre of universe. More importantly, these are the ones struggling with their life and just talking about the kids I witnessed growing up in my family, these are the ones unhappy and simply not able to deal with the normal pressures of life as a young adult - this is a direct result of their parents actions (or lack of it).

This has always been the way with kids that aren't brought up in a responsible way. The problem these days is imo, that people that were brought up with rules and obligations themselves don't see this as necessary, and just let their kids run havoc. Whatever they didn't have as kids or experienced as tough when growing up themselves, is something they won't insist on and maybe that's one of the reasons some kids are struggling (or are simply spoiled brats).

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RE: What advice would you give your 13 year old self.

Don't sweat the small stuff (yeah, still doesn't work sometimes today) doh

Study ag science

But then - I wouldn't be where I am now. wave

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RE: What do you expect from future mate.

Sometimes I actually was tempted to take up drinking. laugh

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RE: What do you expect from future mate.

Initially just being honest - with what they want and can give.

Then we can talk. wine

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RE: Why didn't you climb Everest yet?

That's pretty high up on my "Never going to do this" list. rollers

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RE: The lack of mature adults, both male and female as opposed to being adult in western society & why.

Ummgh, are these societies with initiation rituals really better? confused

I think they happily let some of the ones that don't make the cut die off. Now, there are kids where I think they and their parents can do with a kick up the arse, but I'm pretty happy not to live in a time where initiation rituals are all the rage (does that include genital mutilation and the likes btw.?!?).

It is up to the parents to rear their kids right (and are these not the ones from the good aul' times?)

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RE: Whats been the highlight of your new year so far.

I take it they come after their mum. laugh

wave

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RE: What Advice Would You Give To C/S Members On Here!

Don't take things you receive in PM's too serious or too much to heart. wine

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RE: Do men take Viagra because their partners don't turn them on

I thought that it is medication for ED? confused

I have met 2 quite young guys with ED in the past. The problem was not acknowledging the elephant in the room and do something about it, not myself (or any other woman). wave

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RE: What ya got on the go.....SAY ANYTHING

Internet dating is anonymous, everyone that doesn't have a chance in hell meeting someone in person tries the net these days. Also a lot of people have wayyyyy too much time on their hands. Using CS made me wonder why not a lot more people weren't actually locked up safely somewhere.

To hang around CS, you have to either get thick skinned or you decide who you want to be in contact with and stop people emailing you.

Best of luck, CS should be fun, don't let it get you down. wave

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RE: What is your native language.

My native language is German. These days I speak more English though.

I learned French and Spanish in school and Dutch a couple of years later, but haven't used it since. Dutch is similar enough to German to understand a lot when someone speaks it and I will have to learn French again. conversing

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RE: Why do people complicate things?

Good luck if they really send one. laugh wave

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RE: Do ..Or Can Opposites Attract?

Just speaking for myself - someone that is compatible works best for me. wave

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RE: Why do people complicate things?

Yes, it should be simple as that.

The problem I encountered was that people weren't straightforward - a lot of lies in regards to what they actually want and lying with age and photos. roll eyes

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RE: Do you rate services & products online?

Hiya Crunia, wave I do find them helpful & check them but usually don't rate these myself. conversing .

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RE: How many tests before a woman loses respect and interest in her dude before or after marriage

Yes, something significant must have taken place to make this happen Crania. blues

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RE: Which one would you choose, if you had to pick one.

Right at this moment?

I'm doing pretty well so the only thin to top that would be winning the lotto. banana

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RE: How many tests before a woman loses respect and interest in her dude before or after marriage

Something serious must happen for me to loose respect for my partner - I wouldn't have gotten involved with someone if I wouldn't have a hell of a lot respect for him. wave

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RE: Is Cyber Lub Possible ????

Sorry, my sofa is already full with the 3 of us - but you're welcome to have a coffee at the big armchair by the fire tru. coffee

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RE: Is Cyber Lub Possible ????

I think it can be a tool to get in contact with someone - a relationship or love could only develop over time and after spending time together methinks. wave

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RE: relation ship through the distance. why is so difficult

People are giving their opinion - why are you ridiculing people's experiences and opinions?

It does work for some and great if it does - other people are simply not interested in leaving their home to move into another country. It is possible to meet someone to build up a life with locally. wine

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RE: There is loads of men and women and want to be together, Why aren't they?

Interpersonal relationships are complex.

Yes, some people are looking for a partner. But that doesn't mean that just everyone that has an interest in finding a partner will automatically be a fit.

Deal breakers to get involved with someone are compatibility, values, future plans etc.

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RE: Why do Men say they want relationships when all they want is sex????

I have male friends I appreciate very much and I don't assume that men are only friends with women to get laid. Just giving you a bit of your own medicine there. ;)

I have no problems with someone having a different opinion - but read what I actually wrote. You are welcome to ask before going off disregarding someone's personal opinion.


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RE: Why do Men say they want relationships when all they want is sex????

But the FIRST comment was yours, KN! And, NO OFFENSE MEANT, but you should know BETTER than "I", that what you've asserted is "misleading" (shall we say).
I know what type of emails I received on here and you simply don't know. So I don't care what you assume, it is not true.

But you Europeans have ALWAYS had a much more "open" attitude, towards/about sex, than we Americans have. So I don't see that your statement has a great "likelihood" of being true!
I don't care what you think about the European attitude to sex. I have my own and haven enough shitty stuff in my CS inbox to know that my statement is true.

So being "upfront" about only wanting S*X, is NO barrier, to getting laid!

It is for me and that is all that matters TO ME. roll eyes

(And, knowing that you're a woman, KN. And that you women ARE [on the whole] MUCH MORE "open" about discussing your PHYSICAL wants, needs and experiences, than we men are, I'm AMAZED that you seem to be espousing a position that women WON'T have s*x with a guy that is "UPFRONT" about THAT being his only/sole "interest" in them!)

Oh, I'm impressed that you know women so well that you know how they all think. I know the type of guy I'm interested or not.

So, NO OFFENSE, but I find your thesis that women won't f**k men, if a man's "upfront" about it, LUDICROUS! Just saying.

Congrats on being friends with women to get laid by their friends. laugh
I am quite repeating myself at this point- this is my experience and seeing that you don't have access to my emails or know what is going on at the Irish dating scene of people that are about 30 years younger than you, I find your banging on about my opinion ludicrous.


I have no problem if you have a different opinion than I have, but don't tell me that my experience is wrong or what I should think. wine

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RE: Change your life

I hope you'll find the life you are looking for and someone that makes you happy to join you. wine

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This is a list of forum posts created by KNenagh.

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