FlowerOfTheSnow Forum Posts (2,212)

FEAR

If someone's quality of life is made unbearable while the person they are involved with is in denial and or deeply out of balance when they start doing their soul searching, bearing in mind that the process takes years ...

What is the person at the receiving end supposed to say/do? Put their own needs and future on hold while "every single moment" revolves around the one person doing the soul searching? What for the forseeable future? That would be very generous indeed ... Bearing in mind that the behaviour of the person doing the soul searching can affect the welbeing of the "mate" and that can manifest itself through migraines, rashes or worse ... Especially when those disappear the minute they are not exposed to the soul searchers behaviour ...

When someone uses their so called love to suffocate and "attempt" to completely controle ALL the actions of the person they are supposed to love, it is not called love ...

So yes love conquers all ... ONLY when it's HEALTHY love ... That means NOT to try and erradicate everything that the loved one stands for and NOT to try and "REPLACE IT" by values and directives believed to be better for them ... Because THAT is the very OPPOSITE of FREEDOM ... Why on earth would anyone stick around for MORE of it when by the very actions the person doing the controlling is showing they DON'T KNOW WHAT LOVE IS ... So in this case who's love is going to conquer all?

RE: Solve mysteries!

time or a watch or a one of those time keeping things of which the name escapes me (chronomètre in French)

RE: Solve mysteries!

By his name!!!

FEAR

In my opinion there is something worse in a relationship than fears being at play, especially if the people involved "discuss" those fears...

Much much worse and far more damaging is "denial" that any fears exist whilst at the same time acting and sounding totally enlightened about the damage fears can have in a relationship... IE Fear has no place within the energy of love - And being able to discuss it at great length.

In my experience the person who is in denial will and does act in "unacceptable ways" and when discussions arise from that, they will use every excuse they can think of, including blaming the other person or even others. But will not admit to themseves or others that "their own fears" are causing their behaviour ... Eventually, the other person has to detach themselves for their own protection, and gets more blame heaped on them, before the one in denial, may be, starts looking at themselves and acknowledging their hidden fears ... by then it's "too late" and trust about anything that comes out of the mouth of the person in denial has been eroded ...

I have been in a position where I thought my life was gonna be shortened with not such a comfortable premature ending ... When the situation was thankfully reversed (without excessive physical discomfort - I still HAD a year of "unknowing" to get through), when the final "clean bill of health came through, I DID say "Thank you God, Angels and all Devine Sources". However, I would say that rather than living in fear, what I have now is a different outlook on life. My new motto is "make the quality of your life as you would want it later" because later is an unknown ... That's not a fear, it's a "realisation".

Some fears as you say are healthy and help "keep us safe".

Can fear be realeased or forgotten? It depends how you look at it ... fear of getting lost as a child is "remembered" but no longer active as an adult ...

When it comes to emotions, fearing pain, hurt, disappointment etc... The only way I found of dis-activating the fear is to re-visit the emotion and situation that caused the fear in the first place and to "acknowledge, embrace and welcome the feeling of the pain it caused, then really feel it in your bones and breath into it - let yourself express it without restraint even if it means wailing for a week, 2 weeks whatever time it needs to start healing". Because I believe only "repressed emotions" turn to the type of fear that freezes one's thoughts and natural reactions into something something monumental that we can't handle...

Attitude to "failure" is also a major factor as to whether one fears it or not ... Walking away from something that erodes one's quality of life or balanced state of mind (whatever it is: job, studies, marriage, relationship, country, family - could be anything) I would describe as "making a very good informed choice" ... Others would see it as failure ...

My 2 pence worth

RE: The English Language

Sí! Exactamente!!

¿Cúal es la diferencia?

¿La diferencia entre el español hablado correctamente y el inglés hablado correctamente?

¿A qué diferencia te refieres?

Hay muchosque saben palabras en otras lenguas. ¿y qué¿

RE: Solve mysteries!

air (not fresh, not warm, not hot) just AIR

RE: Solve mysteries!

the energy/spirit of a loved one (passed away)

RE: What women thinks of men

That question works both ways Elley!!!

And I find "you lot" rather unacceptable as a form of address to the ladies in this EU Forum ...Especially if the implication is that "all women" cheat on their husband ...

RE: The little things that drive women wild!!!!!!!

RE: Daddy..........how was I born?

What? Just the one occasion?

Just teasing!!

RE: The little things that drive women wild!!!!!!!

hold on a minute here!!!!

Are "shopping for underwear dates" the same as "dinner dates" and what's the "done thing" ...

1. If the guy invites >>> he pays
2. If the lady invites >>> she pays
3. If they're both a bit tight >>> they go Dutch ...

And last but not least what's the "hidden message" behind it, for later "bedroom manner" (you know along the lines of Lisa Janes's "how a guy unlocks the door" )

RE: What women thinks of men

RE: The little things that drive women wild!!!!!!!

There was me thinking that it's the only time guys don't mind going clothes shopping ... when they gotta go into a ladies undies shop ... and get to pick the laciest most impractical but stunning looking garments ...

And now you saying the lady has to supply her own?

RE: The little things that drive women wild!!!!!!!

That's more like it!!!

RE: The little things that drive women wild!!!!!!!

There was me thinking I was gonna read new stuff to spice up my life and you're talking pissed off wild

not wild!!!

RE: Solve mysteries!

Brunette!!! I think the operative words was "gentle"

Your church bells idea brings a brand new meaning the the Beach Boys song:

I'm pickin up good vibrations
Shes giving me excitations
I'm pickin up good vibrations
oom bop bop good vibrations ...

RE: Solve mysteries!

oxigen

RE: Solve mysteries!

Cool!! Never heard of cyamics ... will look it up for more info ... Also with the body being 80% water I suppose it helps as water is a powerful healing energy channel

RE: Chinese Horoscope

you'll be ok as long as you're not a boiled one!!!

RE: when "bad" things happen, is it really bad?

Sounds like someone up there works in weird and mysterious ways which will (may be) become apparent later ...

Don't take my laughing face as my laughing at your tribulations, more like laughing at the never ending "shifting" and un-planned happenings which appear to be bringing in alternative scenarios ...

Good thing as you say is that no life was/is threatened ... Also in our hour of need is when we find out who our friends are as well as some times reap the rewards of earlier hard work, may be in the form of other professionals valuing "who we are" and giving whatever support they can professionally ...

RE: Solve mysteries!

Hiya Gongman!! Is the healing energy carried by the vibration from the gong?

RE: Solve mysteries!

Aw Witchy sis!! Sounds painful...

If you have a power shower set it on hot/warm and maximum force and let it pelt the most painful area for at least 20 min while you strech your neck and get some movement back. It hurts like hell while you are doing it but it works!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Also sending healing energy your way!!!

the whole thing works even better when after doing all that you get a gentle neck, head and shoulder massage by prince charming or failing that anyone with soft, warm and gentle hands

RE: Daddy..........how was I born?

I don't get it?














































Course I do!!!

RE: Solve mysteries!

Hi PSeg!! Good Sunday to you!!

RE: Solve mysteries!

good point Brunette thank you!! I join you in wishing everyone a happy Sunday!!

Well IS IT light? ... Where's the emoticon for drumming fingers on desk?

RE: Solve mysteries!

fresh air?

RE: Solve mysteries!

We're just soooooooooooooo sharp!! Aren't we Oslo? Go on You give us a riddle next Oslo!

RE: Solve mysteries!

a lovely hot cup of coffee?

RE: Solve mysteries!

Well done Twinself!!!!!

what's the next riddle then?

FEAR

going public is the only way someone at the receiving end is able to protect themselves both from being "judged" for being harsh - for "no apparent reason" and also protect from the continuous twisting and shifting of truths from the perpetrator who does it not to have to face themselves ...

They usually dont want ANYONE to find out "what is going on" because that is part of their "controlling issue" and it means they lose some of that control if people know what they are up... It puts stop to some of the mind games they carry out in public unbeknown to everyone ... only usually the person who is "the target" gets "wound up/hurt"

It takes YEARS to work on this stuff... Anyone who thinks they can do it in A FEW DAYS is "continuing to kid themselves" that they are superior and above others. Might take of few days to acknowledge and do some facing up, but it takes years to get out of the patterns, then as you go along you discover some new facing up to do and more self work to be done ...