I know a few people been living together up to 42 yrs. with out the benefit of being married. These people are still together and some of those disapproving married couples are not divorced. Go figure.
Being married does not mean emotional or relationship security. It just means you have to get lawyers to help you split up the material goods you both accumulated. Some feel that being married will give you some financial benefits in case you split up. If you live together and split up, you do not always get support (for the male or female or children if there are any.)Don't forget that BIG FAIRY TALE DAY where you spend more than you can afford to impress and dress up for one day, and wake up after the honey moon trip is over and have to wake up to reality.
Yes there are many people married and happy, and then the rest who stayed just because it's expected.If the guy or gal wants to walk out they are going to do so whether they are married or not.
When Brian and I got engaged, I thought he was joking and did not believe until he gave me a ring and he broke the news to his family. No date is set. Have no idea if we will actually get married or not.
Sebastino, if the proposal is for real, and sincere, it does not matter how it's done, as long as it's for the right reasons. If it's done as a big show to empress people around you, it's not a real proposal to the lady.
Some of us are OK with just being engaged. It is as much of a commitment to some as being married. If living together (shacking up), or just engaged works why get married? Know people who lived together for yrs and then married and then broke up.
If I do not feel the guy is committed to me or our relationship (or myself is not committed completely) why get married ??? It won't make a person more committed or mean they love you more.
It kind of caught me by surprise to see there was the people from "Quebec" put in the news articles. I was just making fun that usually the worst were when sports events or during St. Jean Baptiste day.
It's sad to see the way things are going. (on both sides of the issues)
TORONTO - The streets of Toronto were quiet Sunday morning - a day after a violent rampage left a trail of burned police cruisers, broken glass and property damage.
But violence broke out again by the late morning. At least 70 people were arrested at the University of Toronto - most of them from Quebec.
This is copied and pasted from news articles about the riots in TO.
I know 3 people that have. One couple met on line, 9 yrs ago, and are expecting their first child. They took their time after meeting on line, and getting to know each other before letting things get serious. My friend claimed he loved her, but both of them were not going to rush into anything fast. Both had been in a serious relationship before and were burned. (Neither had kids).
Second couple I know, are not married. Don't plan on getting hitched. He has a daughter and she has 2 kids. Both have been together for about 5 yrs now. They met on line, and live together. They are a great couple, and parents. Life has given them a few hard breaks, but they have continued to support each other through it all.
Other couple met on line, but not on a date site. One of them has C.P. That a lone can put stress on a relationship. Add in moving to the states where medical costs are out of most people's limits. They have 2 children now and a very strong marriage.
Can it happen??? Yes. It just might not happen like some people expect or as often. Be realistic and don't expect fairy tales.
We can not decide when it will happen. It will happen if and when it is supposed to, and when we allow it.
They wed on May 2, 1930, after only a few months of dating. The groom was 21 and bride was 16. There were four guests at the wedding.
"My mother actually went to the skating rink with my father's brother and when she was standing around in the arena with some of the girls, my dad came in and my mom thought he was going to ask her out," Menzies says.
"He skated right up to my mom and asked her to skate and she went home with him and she never went out with his brother again."
Jessie blushes when asked about what she thought when she first saw Vital.
"He's a hockey player and you know how girls go for hockey players," she says. "It was more or less of a bet. Two other girls said he's coming to skate with them and I said, 'No, he's coming to skate with me.'"
That skate lasted eight decades. They have four children, eight grandchildren and 14 great-grandchildren.
The world's longest marriage still belongs to Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher of New Bern, N.C. They've been married over 86 years since May 13, 1924. He just turned 105 on June 10 and she's 102.
Vital was a soldier in the Second World War, but was sent home from Scotland after he injured his knee and ended up working at the Hollinger Mine in Timmins. In 1965, the couple moved to Oshawa, where he became the head custodian at Courtice Secondary School. He retired 37 years ago.
The couple has been living at the Port Perry Community Nursing Home since last winter but Jessie is looking for her own private room because she needs a break from her husband's snoring. "You give a little and take a lot," she jokes. "I don't know if I can take another 80 years ... honesty and trust are important in a relationship, too."
"The most romantic thing I remember my father doing was only a few years ago. He used to love going to the dollar store and he came out with a teddy bear holding a heart that said, 'I love you' on it and gave it to my mom," Menzies says. "I thought it was so cute because he had to be in his 90s then."
( To those that do not like a copied story from the news ... here is a great story worth sharing with great lessons to be learned by all of us.) Maybe some of us on here can learn from this and get the relationship we say we are looking for.
PORT PERRY, Ont. - If love means never having to say you're sorry, then most couples probably won't last as long as Jessie and Vital Emard's 80-year marriage.
The couple -- believed to share the longest marriage in Canada -- always talk about their day before going to sleep and both vow never to go to bed angry.
"That's his philosophy -- he told me that many times," says Ron Emard, 77, the couple's second-oldest son. "And if you have an argument, you make up before you go to bed. And you don't worry. That's another thing. Everyone knows stress is the worst thing in your life."
When Vital, now 102, speaks about his loving wife, he always smiles.
"She doesn't look 97," he says to her.
People often say that those in love have to spend every waking moment with each other -- but Vital and Jessie exude their affection towards each other without that.
"She's always worked hard at her marriage and my father still loves her after all these years," says daughter Valerie Menzies, 63.
"He'll just sit and look at her. He won't go to dinner unless my mom is there."
He points up to the ceiling when asked what his secret to a successful marriage is. "God," says Emard. "He thanks God. He's very religious."
In fact, religion caused a rift between their families, but their love has marched on.
"He was Catholic and she was Protestant and the priest said, 'Why don't you find yourself a nice French girl?' " says Emard's wife, Leona. "He didn't want to marry one, so he got married by the minister. He was an altar boy at one point, but he gave it up for her."
The couple met during a hockey game in the winter of 1930. Vital played on a Timmins junior hockey team and when he spotted Jessie Perry in the stands with her vibrant red hair, he skated over to her.
Today, everything is busy. Take the time and watch people. Rushing here and there, and all this technology has made us busier not less busy.
Just because some one has not contacted you does not mean, they are not thinking about you. (That is speaking about good friends and family members)
People today take things fore granted and when busy forget to slow down and take a moment to talk (in person not in a chat). Many have jobs, or more than one job, have families and their kids are in sports and other activities. Ever notice many kids are in so many activities, they have no idea how to slow down.
JMO I would prefer some one contact me, and give me the time to talk or sit and have a coffee/tea. If they are just contacting me via email (with jokes) never call or visit in person, I might wonder the same thing Mychelle asked about.
yes ... you don't have to have the same education, but intellectually you should be comfortable with each other. Does not mean you have to have share the same interests.
I love to read books, been to college, and don't share the exact type of music Brian likes. He loves sports, did not do the college thing, nor does he share the same interest in books. His taste in foods are not always the same. We share a common back ground, goals, and family values.
JMO if I was with someone that was a brainiac I might not feel comfortable with them, Example: a person with PHD's up the yin yang,... but on the other hand, I might also be bored with someone who had a very low IQ ( not due to a disability) or simpler way of thinking. Keeping my brain stimulated is important so the person I am with has to be able to keep my interested with the types of conversations we have. Not sure I explained it very well.
You won't find reality in most places, but you also have to have realistic expectations. If you want to find prince charming ... watch a Disney movie or read a fairy tale. Same goes for that Princess ...
If you want someone that matches your exact expectations, have yourself cloned. You also have to remember when you write your post are you writing what you hope others will see ( what you want to be) or are you actually writing the truth?
Expect someone who is real, warts and all. If you are so busy looking up in the clouds, you might miss the person who is a great partner for you.
Being on line, allows people to pretend to be who they are not.
When I met Eyes and Gordo, they were who they said they were. Just like me, they have a history, warts and all.
Use common sense ... if they have lots of money, travel the world, etc., what are they doing on a FREE dating site? If you see a red flag or something does not feel right, it's not a good thing. Many on here have been burned, and use the same behaviors to keep people from getting too close and allowing themselves to find a partner, friend etc.
Soul mate ... isn't that a phrase someone made up and now it's the in thing everyone talks about. They want their soul mate. How about the right partner for them, and you look for the partner you are right for?
Suggestion ... Be happy with yourself and then you might find someone.
KHD100 Forum Posts (2,495)
RE: The Never Ending Story
Bug bites which ...