tinyfangs Forum Posts (1,034)

Snowflakes

I hope all will be well for you, annie. Setbacks and losses can be so painful and disheartening, but sometimes they are just the trigger for something good to enter our lives. Existence can be weird like this


My site presence has run its course. I was considering to delete or at least hide my profile, but I will just leave it as is and simply not return. Maybe I will change my mind some point, but at the moment I really feel I shouldn't be here, only decided to still share the thoughts I had last night watching those flakes fall.
*smiles warmly at everyone and walks away for the time being*

Snowflakes

Last night snow fell and it was beautiful. I stood in the frame of my door here and watched the flakes dance. It was dark, but the porchlights illuminated the flakes close, how they were blown about by the wind in what appeared random patterns.. and it made me think. They were all snowflakes, but it is said not one snowflake is ever quite like the other, and also each and every flake I saw fall had its unique path. All born in the clouds, all falling, but never will any snowflake quite fall like any other before.

I think we are a bit like those snowflakes. There is a starting point, and it will determine a lot of our path, together with the wind blowing us about and other influences.. but eventually we all have a destination where the matter which makes up our physical forms will melt back into the cycle of life. A lot of our path appears to indeed be influenced by forces we have no say over, but unlike the snowflakes we do seem to have some choice and power to change route, still though we share with the flakes the fact that each of our paths is unique. None has walked your path before, and none will ever walk it again...

Maybe it's just how I view things, but I find it amazing to ponder how special and unique everything and everybody is, and that every moment we experience is unique too. We might not like everything and everyone we meet, or every moment we live through on the journey, but the uniqueness is mind boggling for me, and it feels like a gift and even comforting to imagine how truly one of a kind each of us is, and all that surrounds us.

If you feel sad and lonely, not loved and maybe overwhelmed by the challenges of this life - do remember that none other like you has ever existed before, nor will one just like you ever exist again. There is no such thing as the 'perfect snowflake', only countless snowflakes, each perfect in its own uniqueness, and so are you, and your uniqueness adds to the uniqueness of this universe as a whole...



Snowflakes form in a wide variety of intricate shapes, leading to the popular expression that "no two are alike". Although possible, it is very unlikely for any two randomly selected snowflakes to appear exactly alike due to the many changes in temperature and humidity the crystal experiences during its fall to earth.Initial attempts to find identical snowflakes by photographing thousands of them with a microscope from 1885 onward by Wilson Alwyn Bentley found the wide variety of snowflakes we know about today. In 1988, Nancy Knight was documenting snowflakes for the National Center for Atmospheric Research and found two identical snowflakes of the hollow column type, though it was subsequently clarified that the snowflakes were, with near certainty, distinct at the atomic level. - wikipedia

RE: Cant find a man!!

I have actually never looked in all this life, but trouble found me anyway so definitely don't give up fear!

ahem.. I mean hope of course

RE: Cant find a man!!

Don't be desperate, that has a chance to lead you into the wrong relationships for sure

Are you contacting males on those sites, or just waiting to be contacted? It looks a male posted on this forum earlier, and I know other males have, some complained they couldn't find females, so that should mean there are males about who surely would like to chat

Make sure you are happy alone, don't see it as a 'must date to fit in' thing, and eventually when you might not be looking at all, the right one will cross path with you

RE: what is on your mind 17

If it is a loss through death, yes.. time helps ease, but the missing will never go away fully, I don't think. Lost both of my parents now, and even though with my dad it has been 5 years, the pain is still bad, and of course with my mum anyway, that was February last year. Think less about it now, but when I do I still cry. The loss of a child or dearly beloved partner through death, I'd say must be one of the worst traumas, and some will never move past it, although losing parents can be hard too.

Letting go of a failed relationship though is very different, I believe. The cocktail of that pain is made up of various ingrediences. I think it can also be about having to face up to that our dreams and expactations lie shattered, and we can end struggling with feeling a loss of self worth and time invested that seems to have been wasted. There can also be fear involved, for if we really counted on that relationship to last, we can end questioning our judgement and end scared that if we should come to feel again, it might just go the same way, plus the fear of the unknown and sudden loss of habbits. Some of this I have found can also hit the one leaving. Self value feelings are usually not a problem for the one leaving, but the rest can be just as painful and scary, not to mention the feeling of guilt.

The way how I try to look at it is that those who love us want us happy. My parents would not wish me to cry every day, and so I try remember all the wonderful things and draw comfort from having them as memories. That helps me heaps and can stop the tears.
In regards to relationships, or 'romantic feelings', to a degree the same principle applies. If we claim to care for someone, their happiness should matter to us, even if it lies elsewhere, and of course also to look at it that we are free again to find that someone for who we are right, and to see it as a journey with stops on the way, but the final destination still lies ahead.

RE: What Women Want

Meet lots of people is what my oldest son says, a highly attractive 26 year old, and don't linger, keep on the move until you find someone where it does feel 'different'. Then try explore that in more depth, but if it doesn't work out - move on, don't waste time. He says people should stop being scared of rejecting and being rejected, and I do agree with him on that. People can make others feel guilty or awkward, which is not fair. In a more complex world it is a more complex process, having to do with getting to know the self well, and also giving the self and others time to get to know each other. The latter is only worth it though if there is something that feels worth spending that time on. If it does not feel worth the time - set upon meeting the next individual.

Life is not just about surviving physically anymore/to reproduce with whatever highest ranking mate we can secure. Instead we also seek to fulfill now emotional and intellectual needs. Our ancestors for most parts didn't have time to develop and dwell on such things, and it is logical that this impacts our relationships. It is up to us to adapt to the new challenges and to smartly use every means provided to find the he or she who will be compatible. Having 'standards' is good, males and females alike, means we are aware of our needs, and others should not be upset if they don't fit a standard, but be glad they are dealing with someone guided by enough wisdom to not enter a relationship where important personal bases are not covered.

To build a house on solid foundations appears logical to all of us, and so should one check whether a relationship provides solid grounds before attempting to build a life of love and care on it. That's at least what I have learned for sure.

RE: what is on your mind 17

hi Western *and poofs again*

RE: Is Feminism or Feminist an over used word on the Irish Forums?

I shall assume that was a general remark, fifi, and not you trying to hint that I am showing some 'intention' by sticking up for the rabble rousers. My views formed a long time before hitting this forum, and my above post was about opening up another avenue of interpretation. Maybe an interpretation that some do not wish to consider, but that does not mean their interpretations are any more valid than the one I have put forth.

I shall give you the benefit of a doubt that you didn't try to silence me voicing my opinion by that comment. I'd simply not wish to believe such of you *sends a hug*

And yes LadyBlackAdder, I fully agree, people can be touchy, and any comments on such situations should be made with caution and emotional consideration, all the more when voiced in a way that could lead to misinterpretation, but hey - that's where we females by nature should shine, while males.. ahem.. tend to have feet like elephants

RE: Is Feminism or Feminist an over used word on the Irish Forums?

If one points at statistics where children from single mothers fare % wise less well then those from functional 'full' families, that does not necessarily mean one attacks single mothers. It could mean one attacks whatever is creating a society that promotes the destruction of the full family, raises men to have less backbone/willingness/ability to take on responsibilities, or maybe enduced them with a fear of binding to a female. It could even mean full sympathy for single mothers, who no doubt must have it a lot harder, often having to fulfill the role of the breadbringer and the homemaker, and could regard them as victims of laws and a climate where such is becoming more common.

Guess it could just depend on who does the interpreting of a comment.

RE: how to gain weight ??

As some wisely suggested here already, first you should seek medical advice. If you lost the weight fast and without reason in your lifestyle, you should have possible underlying causes investigated by a doctor, I think.

Found this link, which is a rough guide. According to this I am at ideal weight, but at your height and with 7 stones you'd be a bit under the recommended bracket, so a trip to the doc really sounds the right thing

Gym instructors can't check your blood and stuff, but surely will be a good aid to get things fine should there be no health reasons for that weight loss.

RE: Is it better to meet someone to get to know them, or email for days/weeks before meeting

Heavens, I don't read the forums much anymore, but when I do I find that? o.O

Keep me out of the gossiping, please, I am off the site, only came here to find some friends, but have meantime decided I don't really need that either, at best only acquaintances I'd hoped for; I am terribly fussy, I admit that.

Not only MGTOW - I am lining for GTOW up as well - first time in this life that I don't have to fear a day of guilt ahead, trying to be something for someone else I know I can't be.

pfft to wolves.. there isn't just one animal living within me, cat, bird, deer, all there too, and no hunter versed enough to track all of them down

Good luck to all, but yes, please keep me out of stuff, all the more if there is no real knowledge about me involved, thanks

RE: I hear the water rates are being introduced soon.

Farmers never needed any government to help them. 'Help schemes' in my view have led to farmers specialising to the point of not being able to provide to needs anymore, in my view a clever twist, making us all more and more vulnerable and dependent on an obscure system. It is the over-regulating, the bulk of confusing and overwhelming laws and regulations, which causes the issues, while with no government to interfere, people could look at what is actually beneficial to produce for their local market, as they did for as long as humanity has been settling instead of roaming.

That is just what I think though, and obviously my view must not be correct

RE: Are you in favour of men's rights or Feminism

Yes, that is why I said in a previous post somewhere that my definition of 'patriarchy' differs from disctionaries, although it might not even be that, but rather the images this word now rises in the minds of most who hear the word. To me a man being the head/leader of his household is not oppression. None in our family was ever 'oppressed', it was a with each other, but still my father led from the front and he did a wonderful and reassuring job that benefitted all of us.

RE: Arts and Culture thread

I had a youtube link sent last night and would like to share. This is utterly amazing stuff in my view. Want a rope to climb down into all those beautiful caves!!!






And this is brilliant to

RE: Are you in favour of men's rights or Feminism

There will be no silly hats and banners and pins, sorry having to disappoint but no doubt more threads from him (I assume at least) and my occasional ranting/rambling in support, venting my pain about the fact that indeed that is where we find ourselves now, while it definitely was not ever a destination I personally wished to arrive at...

Off to chase some free people in Middle Earth about - Sauron needs all the help he can get too

RE: Are you in favour of men's rights or Feminism

I have spent most of my life as a protector too, Fraya, but I can not say I enjoyed it, never felt I was meant/cut out for it, but someone had to rise, and generally it ended with me having to be that one.

It is a need for me personally, Fraya, if I wish to achieve personal contentment. Have I survived without it?
I'd not be typing here a you if I had not...

RE: Are you in favour of men's rights or Feminism

The problem with our law system is that it too is influenced by interest, and it is reflecting the interests of those who rule our societies. Law making is a monopoly, as is basically all decision making now in regards to our lifes, and we in truth have little say in any of it.

The patriarchy you describe is one I have grown up in, and it was a very good and beneficial set-up for all of us in that family involved, but yes, it does need the right type of male for it, and I was luckyo(or doomed?) to have experienced the presence of one. No doubt many of my views are influenced by that experience, while same time also having experienced the various 'set-ups' of other families, and none seemed to work as well as the one with a strong protective male in the lead.
Maybe if others could have access to this my experience, they would better understand, as I have found what I experienced to have grown very very rare.

RE: Are you in favour of men's rights or Feminism

Can I hand in a petitition for her to grow them please? Those things look uncomfortable in pants (and that's just so selfish of me, I know, sozzy Fraya!!!!!!!! *begs for forgiveness (but still writes the petitition )*

RE: Are you in favour of men's rights or Feminism

You are touching on quite serious business there, all jokig aside for a moment.

I have found in today's world, that I have crossed path with far more powerful females than males. Many of them very capable protectors, and even little lost I have risen rather than males when a situation of injustice arose.

Are you female Fraya? Tell me you are not and make my day

RE: Are you in favour of men's rights or Feminism

Which one? The one where you got my hopes up, or the on where you smahed my hopes again?

RE: Are you in favour of men's rights or Feminism

Not agree sounds odd, Fraya, not able to relate more like it maybe?

As for this thread - I share certain vies with the OP, alas due to different experiences no doubt, still some of the conclusions are the same. Why should we not be allowed to exchange about this subject? I spent a lot of time turning this subject over in my mind, others might rather prefer to discuss their favourite soap or even legs, over..under..positioned... and when they do so I tend to just shrug and accept that to them such matters, as other things matter to me.

I do not voice my views to attract random 'screwing' - I rather take my chances with that time machine having some screws loose

RE: Are you in favour of men's rights or Feminism

Nah, they'd ask for a ride, and that machine is too tiny

RE: Are you in favour of men's rights or Feminism

No and no and no - but I shall continue to work on that time machine (even if I can hardly remember what way a screw is turned and I might end in some alternate universe instead but how far worse than CS can it get? I feel I am prepared for almost anything now )

RE: Are you in favour of men's rights or Feminism

Agreed, but some are just not lucky enough to have received the right training in time, and then maybe those who know how to fight back need jump in to avoid the worst, but of course we are also now raised to look away and not care.

*is rambling off topic and wanders away, mind occupied with something else*

RE: Are you in favour of men's rights or Feminism

Indeed, matching is not easy, and the media bombarding us with lots of unrealistic imagery does not help either. We are all left to feel inadequate due to it, and many will also end brainwashed into forever feeling there is 'better' out there, solely dependant on looks. Few nowadays still know harmonic contentment, within themselves, their relationships and about everything else in regards to life

RE: Are you in favour of men's rights or Feminism

hmm.. you definitely sound like you at least know how to keep a fire going well *debates with self whether to send him her cup size now*


@ LadyBlackAdder
Those are sad fates you describe, and indeed wrong doings are by no means one sides in regards to gender.

RE: Are you in favour of men's rights or Feminism

If that was an attempt to get measurements, I shall first ask you to show me you can make fire with sticks

RE: Are you in favour of men's rights or Feminism

Fully agreed, but if we have certain requirements for respecting our males (and it seems that a lot of these have to do with how we have developed evolutionary), I'd say it makes fair sense our males will have their requirements the same, and we should aim to fulfill them too.

What could those requirements be that males need fulfilled from us? (and I am not talking cup size here *rolls eyes already in advance* :P)

RE: Are you in favour of men's rights or Feminism

I believe that with you, but how many females out there clearly do state they want a male taller?
And what if a male would be a head shorter? Would it take some consideration? More consideration than if the same male would be a head taller?

btw, I clearly want a male taller than me, I wish to look up physically, same as I long to look up to my male in other regards too (height actually being the least important)

RE: Are you in favour of men's rights or Feminism

I would really just like to put forward the question to women - if you want a taller male - why?

Is it because we like to look up to our males? Because we wish to have them towering over us as it makes us feel all warm inside and ready to submit to them? What other reason could it be? And I hear this specific requirement of the male being taller a lot from women.

But if we do wish to look up to our males physically, does this not entale that we overall wish to look up to them? That we want to know they are strong, capable, ready to protect us...

How can we want that if same time we want to be all 'equal'? Should that not mean we want males just same height as us? Or maybe shouldn't care what height they have compared to us, as we are all so equal.. how can something as silly as taller or shorter even cross our minds? o.O

It just puzzles me somehow..