RE: Should Children Work?

My daughter had her own paper round business by the time she was 12.

I did it with her, so it was a safe learning experience.

She paid for her bedroom decoration and furniture, 2 school ski trips, a school trip to Disneyland Paris and more.

I had the child benefit (which all parents get in the UK) paid into her account and she budgeted that for swimming, martial arts, horse riding, skiing and ballet lessons/equipment.

It's educational for children to work, earn and budget. It's educational (and fun) for children to save up for extra-curricula lessons and experiences.

12 hour shifts in a sweatshop for two bowls of rice and a hard floor to sleep on, no.

RE: If you had to give up chocolate or sex

I'm pretty sure I don't have the chocolate and sex options.

Can I give up work and keep the sleep, please? laugh

RE: I'm back

Don't worry LJ, you're not a dimensional person at all.

RE: Brain cells

I don't recall ever wondering about that.

RE: Dear Racist and Sexist

The might have been a more ethical code of conduct for societies, or some societies in the stone age.

I imagine there's more war, more greed, more environmental damage, etc., now than there ever was when the planet was less populated and less 'advanced'.

RE: Do you hold grudges ?

I think if I came face to face with my granddaughter's sperm donor, I might exhibit some rather aggressive grudginess traits, but it's so unlikely to happen I think I can categorise that as a dormant grudge.

Other minor grudges usually get resolved because they can't lie dormant.

RE: cold-shoulder...

I remember a time when you had to be quick to keep up with the forums.

I used to contribute quite a lot and always made point of trying to respond to newbies. I remember my first tentative posts and how difficult it was to get going, but really it's just a matter of posting enough until people start to recognise you.

You're not being snubbed, it's not personal, it's not about cliques - it's just that familiarity takes a little longer than when interacting in person.

I've already moved on from 'who's Molly Sawdust?' to 'oh, it's Molly Sawdust!' and I think this is only the second time I've replied to one of your posts.

Keep going, it doesn't take long. wave


In my country the media is free to publish anything, as long as it's not a secret.

RE: Are you on drugs?

Gabor Mate's TEDx talk on addiction.

Well worth a watch.

RE: R.I.P. Jim Stobie

Welcome to the forums, Joe. wave

I had to Google Jim and now I have, I'm regretting my current grandma-like lack of technology and that I can't watch Jim's films.

I'll stow that away for another day, thankyou.

RE: do you like christmas?

Who would enjoy what, Non?

I rather think you might be implying that Hex's posts might have a 'beat me, beat me, you beastly feminazi...!' tone to them.

I think I might read them differently from now on. giggle

RE: do you like christmas?


D'ya think black and blue will be okay?

RE: do you like christmas?


I'll be ready to bite as soon as I've fixed up a snowblind date for Hex.

RE: do you like christmas?

I like thumping the snowman at work and seeing my colleague's faces.

I don't expect my pleasure to last long. We had some glittery letters spelling NOEL a couple of years ago, but they got taken away because I kept hiding the E and the L.

RE: ever feel like a leporacy in advoided in all walks of life?

When I was a fairly mature mum in my 30's, I looked about 13 years old.

People were sometimes patronising, often downright hostile.

The greatest use I've ever had from my extensive education was the ability to say, "Actually, I'm a graduate!" snooty


RE: The bastard should be hung drawn and quartered,

No, your thread title is about angry and revenge.

That's not the same as justice.

RE: Do women really need feminism?

I never once tried to demonstrate that my daughter's father was an unfit father.

I tried to demonstrate that he had issues that he needed to address which were impacting on her.

I tried to demonstrate that if he didn't wish to address his issues, then contact needed to take place in a controlled environment to ensure her well being.

Demonstrating that he was an unfit father, well, he did that all on his own.

I wanted the exact opposite for her and for me.

It wasn't a bundle of laughs working by night and parenting a crushed child by day for years.

RE: Do women really need feminism?

Yes Molly, rights come with responsibilities. A cliché, but an apt one in some cases.

RE: Do women really need feminism?

Maybe equal legal rights isn't the whole issue, Molly.

Regardless of legal rights, judges often favour mothers as primary care givers. There's a gender bias within the law, just as there are racial and class biases.

There are other psychological issues. If a mother is awarded the primary care role and then inhibits access, it's a bit tricky slapping a penal order on her because of the disruption and distress that it would cause the child(ren).

It less that the law needs to be changed, as the application of the law and the practicalities of enforcing the law.

RE: Do women really need feminism?

Where did I say that anyone should be scared of women who have consensual s*xual relationships with women, saorstat?

Where did I say that there wasn't gender discrimination in the family courts?

And in answer to your other question, of my two best mates, one is a single dad of four, the other co-parents his twin nieces. Children is one of the things the three of us have in common.

My daughter's father lost pretty much all of his parental rights when he stood up in court and said he'd rather have nothing to do with her than take a drugs test. The judge left the case open in case he ever changed his mind, but he never did. I suggested he and my daughter walked their dogs in the field by our house so at least some contact could be maintained, but he f*ck that up, too.

There's a feminist argument to redress the gender discrimination within parental rights, but it also involves taking responsibility for personal behaviour. The focus is the best interests of the child(ren); gender discrimination is not in their best interests, but protection is.

RE: The bastard should be hung drawn and quartered,

Are atrocities the solution to atrocities?

Is cruelty the solution to cruelty?

Is inhumanity the solution to inhumanity?

Or do we make some attempt to break the cycle of abuse?

RE: Do women really need feminism?

"Feminists aren't angry lesbians who hate men."

Firstly, the labelling: feminism is a political movement, or a perspective.

I have a femininist perspective, it's not all that I am. I don't feel the need to label myself as a feminist. Likewise, with the label "lesbian".

Secondly, some people may be angry, have s*xual relationships with women and hate men. It doesn't mean they can't have a femininist perspective and believe in equality. The two aren't necessarily mutually exclusive.

I really dislike some people quite intensely, but I don't think they should have fewer human rights as a result.

The whole idea of feminism is that people may have the freedom to chose without the constraints of gender, or any other discrimination.

If I'm angry, that's my peckel to carry; if I want to have consensual s*xual relationships with men, women, or anybody else, that's my choice; if I hate a shed load of people I can if I want, as long as I don't impinge upon those people's well being, or equal rights.

Anyone can have a feminist perspective because feminism is about equal rights and equal rights means you get to choose without discriminatory constraints.

I think perhaps the angry, lesbian, man hater thing is a euphemism for female chauvinism. Euphemisms often don't offer much in the way of clarity. In this example, I'd say it was entirely counter productive to the concept of equal rights.

RE: Do women really need feminism?


I wonder if cause and correlation are getting muddled up here.

Is feminism the cause of the family unit breaking down?

Perhaps inequality is the cause of the family unit breaking down if women started to challenge traditional family roles, dynamics and behaviour.

Maybe feminism correlates with the movement to challenge the inequalities of the family unit, given its a movement to challenge inequalities.

If one of those inequalities is that women are still viewed in law as being the natural primary carers of children, then feminism, the movement for equal rights for women, is surely the obvious solution to redressing the balance when it comes to gender discrimination within parental rights.

I've said it already, one of the problems is people viewing feminism as a threat and that they might lose out.

I'm sorry, but I think men are being a bit dull if they can't think up an effective way of arguing from a feminist perspective to achieve equal rights for themselves. hmmm

RE: Do women really need feminism?

Treating people equally is not the same as treating everyone the same.

If I make everyone a size 12 frock, very few people will have a suitable item of clothing. I've treated everyone the same, but to treat everyone equally I would have to make everyone an item of clothing which suits their individual needs.

One issue with treating everyone equally is that it takes more time and effort. Another is that some people think they might lose out and can't see the advantages for themselves.

The same/equal argument works similarly with cat calling - it doesn't suit some people. It tends to not to suit a lot of women for a number of reasons and the social ramifications are broad.

If it tends to suit some men, it doesn't mean it's socially acceptable to treat everyone the same.

The trouble is, when you're yelling at randomers, there's not much scope for ascertaining the recipient's individual needs, in which case it's perhaps best to keep your gob shut.

RE: Would you EAT your own PLACENTA if it benefited the baby?

A couple from the NCT classes my daughter and I attended made a pate from the placenta.

I think they were hoping for foie gras, but ended up with Tesco Value Range pate. laugh

The best placenta story I heard was from our NCT teacher who is a personal friend. Apparently, one woman kept the placentas of all three of her children in the freezer, for some reason, not wanting to part with them.

Her property was broken into one night and the thieves got away with the entire contents of her chest freezer...

RE: Do women really need feminism?

How can women be saying they are victims if they need feminism, if men (and all people) have the right to equality, too?

If feminism is the political movement for equal rights for women and you can't have equal rights for women without having equal rights for everybody else, then feminism is the political movement for equal rights for everybody.

If needing feminism is saying that women are victims, then it's saying that everybody is a victim, otherwise it would be unequal.

One could argue that everybody is a victim of inequality, and that maybe true in different ways for different people, but maybe suppressive techniques such as name calling isn't really the best way forward to reduce oppression, eh? laugh

RE: Have you ever answered a toy phone?

Fairly regularly and it's always granddaughter calling me, or one of the unicorns.

It's much like chatting on the forums. giggle

RE: Do u really want to meet someone on cs - or r u just leading them on - for a good laugh ?

If I'm analytically superior because I can read the options under the 'seeking relationship' part of the profile set up, you're in trouble, Snooks. laugh

RE: Gender neutral public restrooms

Well, I should have read more of the thread before posting, but I took a few days to think it over, too.

And then I had my post all written and waiting and no signal.

I did kinda wonder at the strangeness of a security guard in a restroom, but I also wonder at the strangeness of American culture and thought the two things might be linked in some way. blushing giggle

RE: Gender neutral public restrooms

The situation you describe appears different than the one you state.

A lavatory which anyone can use is like a bathroom in a house. You only need one for everyone and there's some way to maintain privacy, like a lock on the door.

Maybe I've got it all wrong, but what you appear to be describing is that the security guard didn't make his presence known by the time your hem was over you knee and didn't look away because he saw your rabbit/headlight face.

The problem isn't gender neutral restrooms. Privacy can be arranged. Personally, I like privacy and don't like using communal women's facilities. I find peeing in company a tricky little maneuver and so tend to use the gender neutral disabled toilets.

The problem appears to be that some f*ck thought it was a good idea to arrange for a pervert to stand guard in case of perverts.

If you were British, you might have written a letter by now.

And copied in a relevant authority.

This is a list of forum posts created by jac_the_gripper.

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