I'm not Scottish by birth, I'm originally from South Africa, so sun isn't quite the siren call it should be. Been there, done that, even had the skin cancer ... man, I am just one bundle of fun tonight. And should be sorting out what clothes I'm going to take. THAT's what triggered the current panic attack ...
Just ONE week! Hell, the thought of two made my chair shake, not just me!! Interesting. That implies it is the holiday itself and definitely not the flights.
Previous holidays I have been staying with someone and had little or no control. But I didn't want to go from the beginning, let myself get talked into this. Maybe it IS latent resentment flaring big-time. Second childhood time and I'm throwing a toddler tantrum? against myself?
Yikes, that's a serious flight! But it really isn't the flight that's bugging me, I'm used to coping with that. (Get valium. Sleep all the way, arrive refreshed and ready to enjoy that holiday of yours!)
I'm not even that worried if it DOES crash. When it's time, it's time. A bit early but hey ...
it's the whole thing. Any part I think of, try to look forward to, I start shaking.
I think - it was a long time ago but feels familiar - the last time I was this panicky was two days before my wedding. Not because I didn't want to marry him, because of immense family tensions (divorced hostile parents, all sorts of complications) I DID get meds that time and was so sedated by the actual day I don't remember much about it. The relative concerned wasn't there, as it happens, so this isn't flashbacks.
And yes, thanks. That was okay in the end, there was no reason for such terror. That helps! It was all fairly awful, but it wasn't a tragedy.
Whoa time is tight for that one. Monday is a local public holiday, at work Tuesday, leave Wednesday morning. (Actually shuddered as I typed that)
But drugging myself implies it is irrational - I'm okay with finding it is, but I'm not usually given to irrational fears. That's part of why this is freaking me out.
All I can think is that I would offer them mine in a heartbeat. It's not fear of flying or of being away from home, I've done a ton of travelling in the last 18 months. It started as not wanting to think about it, not wanting to prepare for it, and now that I have to because it is imminent, I am in a cold sweat of fear and can't pin down why.
So I brought it to the polls, because this is a great place to talk things out.
Does it? I've spent so long going with the flow and never doing what doesn't feel right that I'm not coping with the feeling I should not be doing this
in this particular case, going on a holiday I didn't want, with a relative who is counting on me, and the closer it gets the more panicky I get, and I don't know why.
Just wondered if anyone has had the same and what the outcome was.
It could equally apply to changing jobs, moving country, getting married, much more serious things ...
You can have my comment anyway, since yours implies the explosions are planned and controlled rather than involuntary. I've probably exploded 5 times in my entire life in reaction to something happening in front of me. Most were a response to an attempt to humiliate or injure someone, not usually me.
Does the guy who hauls back and punches his girlfriend in the face think calmly and rationally while he's doing it? You're talking emotion, not reason.
When the flames have completely died, probably not a good idea. If they pitched up, ta dah! let's take up where we left off, no!
EVERYTHING depends on why it ended first time round, surely? But I like so very few people enough to light a flame in the first place that I'd for sure see them again, if only to find out if there were still coals. Usually there aren't. There's always the option that a new fire could be built, and it can be done and has been done, but there's no point re-lighting the old one.
Seduced my ex-husband (who lives hundreds of miles away) at a family gathering about 18 months ago and we both enjoyed and were both cool with parting again afterwards but that was the exception rather than the rule.
Nobody can hide forever in an active conversation. Bigotry, fanaticism, old resentments, serious lack of brain, all pop up if they are there. I like talkers, they are easy company, but I really like talkers who are saying something, not just bumping their gums for the sake of hearing their own voices.
No question of a broken heart. I was just intrigued as to why he was always available, but only when I asked, and wondering if anyone else had experienced the same, or knew the answer. I do know he's a workaholic. Pretty sure on the wife / GF front if only because it would be an odd wife or girlfriend who would be relaxed about letting their extremely attractive fella zoom off for the evening, all dressed up and looking pretty, without at least raising their eyebrows
You and Jac should go into business together - consultants to the CS Muddled Of Mind!
Instigators are exciting but only if you find them attractive. They can come perilously close to pushy ... and I don't mind making an opening move, or two, or pushing along once or twice, but not in a vacuum. If he's not meeting me more than halfway, I lose interest. So yes, (3) is the closest to the right answer!
anxiety attack!
I'm not Scottish by birth, I'm originally from South Africa, so sun isn't quite the siren call it should be. Been there, done that, even had the skin cancer ... man, I am just one bundle of fun tonight. And should be sorting out what clothes I'm going to take. THAT's what triggered the current panic attack ...