Thank you! I was thinking that if she is single when I am through college and have some work experience then I will go out to California to be with her. For all I know I may meet someone who is just as wonderful as she is in college. I just feel like she's pretty special to me and I don't want to give up hope that I could be with her someday.
Thanks for your input and what you said might be the unfortunate truth that I have to face eventually. I have strong feelings for this girl Stephanie and she has said to me that she loves me back but when she finds another guy almost a week after then I start to wonder how much she likes me. She isn't dating this guy yet since she needs time to get over the other guy she was dating, but it seems likely that they will be together. I am going to talk to other women who live much closer to New York.
The best thing to do is to ask what the guy's intentions are. If he likes you back then I would recommend going to see this man. It seems the best way to know if you are going to be compatible with this person is if you are around him. See how you feel and pay attention to your gut feeling. I am in a similar situation with a girl who lives in California and I am all the way over in New York. The only difference is that I know she has feelings for me. I wish you happiness and I hope this guy helps you feel happy.
In the last post I mentioned a woman who is in California that I was interested in dating. In that time since then we have decided to be friends until I have graduated from college and I'm not so tied up in New York. I feel as if I should go find a school out in California so I can be closer to Stephanie. Not too long ago she stopped dating the guy she was with but shortly after she has found someone else. She told me that if she is single and I've got my life in better order that she would be in a relationship with me since it would be more practical. I feel as if this girl is special to me and I don't know if I can find someone as caring, kind, funny, and affectionate as she is. We also have common interests and experiences we both can relate to. Unfortunately I told her that I cared about what others would think of me, including my family, about going out to California. So what I am asking your opinion on is should I move on, continue to be friends with this girl, and find a woman who lives closer? Also, should I place my family in New York as more of an importance than a relationship with a woman?
Once again thank you for taking the time to read this and respond.
I believe it is possible, but it takes patience. I have at least three dating site accounts that I am active on and I have had hit and miss results. I wish the best for you and I hope you find someone that you are truly happy with.
The best thing would be to keep your first message to a woman short. Also, start with something besides "how are you?" Ask her a question that you think is out of the ordinary but not too personal such as "what's your favorite quote or saying?"
I am glad you told me about that and it's good to hear from someone who lives in California about the job situation. It's just I don't want to go there and just be a financial burden to this woman and not have a job. If I didn't care about her I wouldn't think about these things. I love this woman very much and she is a great friend to me and I wish things were more in my favor but the best thing to do is stay where I am in New York.
Thank you chococherrie! I appreciate your feedback. At the moment I feel like the best thing is to focus on school and stay in New York, maybe find a relationship here. When I do become more independent, have my bachelor's, and both this woman and myself are available I think something can work out. It's just right now I don't feel like anything could work out even if she were single. I love this woman a lot and I care about her deeply, and I feel awful that she is feeling so sad but I can't do anything about that, I just need to let her heal.
I've been talking to a good friend of mine whom I've known for 6 months and I have romantic feelings for her as well. At the moment she is in a relationship but she has expressed that she feels the same way about me. I asked her out a week after she got into a relationship and she has been with this other guy for more than three months now. Yesterday I told her that I didn't think I would be able to come out to California and that she ever became single that I don't know if my coming out to California would be practical. I don't know anyone else there, I'm not sure what schools are out there, and I don't know if I would be able to find a job. My intent was to think practically but it ended up hurting her. I love her a lot and I have strong feelings for her but I was trying to think ahead instead of going somewhere I am not familiar with and acting without thinking. At the moment I wish I could take back the things I said to her about not thinking a relationship would work, I really would like it to because I feel like it's hard to find a woman like her who is as beautiful, has a heart of gold, and who has a wonderful personality. Did I do the right thing or could I have gone about things in a different way? I would especially like to hear from the women about this.
Thanks! Next time I'll keep that in mind not to text or e-mail as much. I've been talking to other women though I do think about his other girl from time to time. It doesn't bother me as much as it used to. In my opinion your reply was the most help but I do appreciate everyone's input because a lot of it helped me.
If you were to receive a compliment from a guy whom you've been talking to for 3 to 4 weeks and he said something like "I think you have very pretty eyes" how would you react? I've given women compliments like this and usually the woman doesn't reply back and every once in a while she does and says thank you. I'm just wondering why some women don't reply back.
I received a reply from the e-mail I sent and yes it is true she didn't want to hurt me but from what she said she is busy with grad school and wouldn't have time for a romantic relationship. She agreed that we can be friends and hang out when her schedule permits her to do so.
So I arranged and went on a date with this girl I met on a different dating site. It seemed things went alright. I was wrong though since I didn't hear back from her after that night. During the date we went to see a movie and then she drove me back home. Over the course of a few weeks I texted her 3 times and sent her a few e-mails on the dating site I met her on. I felt as if I made an effort to keep in contact with her. I finally heard back from her yesterday and she said she felt like we didn't have a lot in common and that she would be boring to talk to. She mentioned the difference in age and the fact that we have different career choices. I sent her a message telling her I felt the opposite way and thought we had quite a few things in common. We both like some of the same bands, similar interests in movies, and she's a musician (plays the drums) and I play guitar. Even if she and I didn't have as much in common we would have enough things in common to at least start a conversation. I also told her that we could introduce each other to things we didn't know existed like bands we never heard of. I told her if she just doesn't think a relationship can work out that I can respect that but I think that she and I could at least be friends. I value my friendship with her and I want to talk to her and get to know her better. Did I do the right thing or could I have done something different?
Thank you for the compliments. Maybe it's because women don't usually go for chubby guys like myself. I'm not really sure
There was a girl there who was singing and playing guitar but by the time I got back to where she had been with my guitar she left not long before I guess.
RadioheadFan123 Forum Posts (471)
tough decision
Thank you! I was thinking that if she is single when I am through college and have some work experience then I will go out to California to be with her. For all I know I may meet someone who is just as wonderful as she is in college. I just feel like she's pretty special to me and I don't want to give up hope that I could be with her someday.