Wow. This sounds like what I just experienced... but I was "her". I met a fantastic guy. He had everything going for him... looks, personality, a good job, we got along fabulously! He made me laugh & I really enjoyed being with him! He treated me like a real lady. My friends were happy for me & so was I.
Unfortunately, the spark that I so desparately was looking for just wasn't there. I figured if I just gave it a little more time, it could happen. Then one day, he confronted me on why I seemed to always pull away from him. I couldn't lie. I didn't want to tell him the truth for fear that I'd lose something that had the potential to be wonderful. But I told him I guess I'm just a dud at relationships. I told him I hoped we could remain friends, which I sincerely meant. He left feeling very hurt. I texted him later & apologized. He lashed out, understandably. I'd hurt him.
Then a few days later, he emailed me & told me he was sorry & that the last thing he'd wanted to do was jeopardize the good friendship we'd had & that he held so dear. We made it back to a 'strained friendship' for now. But I'm sure we'll be OK, given time.
Sometimes, no matter how much either of you want it, it just isn't there & that has to be accepted... painful as it may be at the time. As someone said earlier in this thread. Sometimes they can make the best of friends!
IMO, it's selfishness. And some men have a problem with raising other men's children. Sometimes they think if they have to reprimand the child(ren), they'll have to answer to another person. Others don't want the 'added expense'...
I was 'cyber-dating' someone on here a while back. I'd mentioned to him that I forgot my lunch one day & he was going to call in a surprise order from all the way across the country to Pizza Hut & have them deliver it to my office. I thought that was really sweet.
I was a single mom. It wasn't easy to find a man, especially one who wanted to include my daughter in the relationship. I've heard men say they don't want ready-made families... so unfair.
But then again... if the child's own father can't take the responsibility, why should someone who didn't even MAKE the child? It does suck though.
Very well-put!! Maybe that's why I find myself running from anything that could/might be a serious relationship anymore. That is such a horrible feeling & my track record is lousy.
Wow! That's cool! I've been wondering lately why the heck I purchased right now. I couldn't sell if I wanted to in this lousy market. But oh well... my friends keep reminding me that now I own property. I'm not 'throwing my money away' anymore. It's just expensive!
I have to agree. Some can't separate the two. And it can be a fine line, so could be understandable why. But when they can view both sides of a situation & still see their own side as having more merit, then in my opinion, that is justification. But attacks are childish. And I personally choose not to acknowledge them. Why fuel the fire?
Cj, you will be in my thoughts sweetie! I always live by the resolution, "Don't worry until there's really something to worry about." It's seemed to have gotten me by so far. Please keep us posted as to what you find out, OK?
Very well put, jb. I've had it happen to me, as well. You've made some EXTREMELY VALID points here. I've always enjoyed reading what you have to say, & will continue to, I'm sure.
sweetowen Forum Posts (8,850)
RE: She suddenly wants to be "just friends"
No offense to the OP, but how do we know he's actually from there or that he's of that culture?