Yes, I would date a man with kids, but it'd depend on their age(s) & behavior... or how the father reacts to behaviors. This may not sound fair. But it's true.
I think you all read me wrong... I don't believe in changing someone. What I was saying in my post was that if one feels he's/she's being changed or feels that the other needs changed, then is the relationship even worth trying to go for? I mean, if you see these differences in the beginning, would it be worth it to even go further & try? I tend to figure if we have differences that may be 'changeable' on either part, I'm still not sure I want to pursue the relationship because I remember my first marriage. Looking back, I remember each of us trying to change the other (probably me trying to change him more) & I don't ever want to go into a relationship thinking he'll change for me. That's what the whole farst of my first marriage was based upon... mis conceptions, misgivings, & beliefs in 'dreams come true'. I'm much older & wiser now. I now believe that "what you see is what you get". See it for what it is. If you can't live with that, what's the point in pushing further? It just ends up hurting one or both of you in the long run.
But that's sort of my point. If your head's not considering things & you let your heart just lead you, you could really wind up in a bad/unhappy situation.
It's not marriageability. But some people will say you were just stringing them along if you 'pal around' with them with no future intentions. But you truly do have to feel out the person/situation for a possible future, IMO.
What about long-range goals? I know that when I retire, I would LOVE to move south & hopefully travel. If my potential partner doesn't want that, it really deflates my ideal of the relationship. Maybe that sounds selfish, but there are just some things I really don't want to waiver on. Possibly, for the right person, this mindset may change. But right now, that's how I feel.
Yes, sassy, you're totally right, sweetie. The ones that annoy me are people who turn into either someone totally different to suit their current partner, or into a mirror image of their current partner.
No, I didn't mean they are EXTREMELY not compatible. I just meant that maybe they grew up quite differently, values were instilled differently, habits/mannerisms were quite different. Is this something that can be overcome/overlooked or do you (both) have to change? I mean, you have a great time when you're together, you make each other laugh, treat each other with genuine love & respect, but yet there are still those underlying habits/beliefs/mannerisms, etc that might work on possibly chiseling away at the relationship.
I do completely agree with you, J. But don't you think you'd possibly be subconsciously trying to change them? Or they you? It happens so often. That's one thing I did in my first marriage that I've vowed not to do again. But if you really care for someone... but there's that ONE THING that is a big difference between the two of you... don't you unintentionally try to get them to change that?
Do you think it's possible to be live happily with someone who is not extremely compatible with you financially, socially, politically, living/style-wise, etc? If you get along fabulously, but know that there are so many differences between the two of you, can you actually make the relationship work? Do you think one of you would have to change? And would you both be happy if one is really trying to change the other?
I'm not going to push. He knows where I am, right? He hasn't made any real indication that he would have a hope of trying to rekindle (or just start) any kind of a relationship or anything. I'm afraid I'd turn him off if I push.
I found out yesterday from Merky. She asked me to give condolences from her & Slim. May I also say how truly sorry I am to hear this. He was well-liked on here & had many friends. Such horribly sad news.
Going to pick up my paycheck for my part-time job tonight. Then home & to bed early. A friend is picking me up at 7 am tomorrow for a motorcycle run...
Sunday... church. Oh, & a birthday party for my niece & nephew.
sweetowen Forum Posts (8,850)
I thought you were asking ME, personally! 
RE: Interview The person Below
Nope, not now. When I was a kid, we rescued birds & I once rescued an injured baby squirrel.Have you ever been on national TV?