Anyone interested in finding their Irish Ancestors? Do you wonder if they may be looking for you? There is information out there, but all genealogy sites charge fees, and no guarantee they will have any information. Everyone asking questions anywhere online could help you or some one else. I write this because so many people looking for their relatives.
FIRST DEGREE A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning. The wife (undoubtedly blonde), picked up the phone, listened a moment and said 'How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!' and hung up. The husband said, 'Who was that?' The wife said, 'I don't know, some woman wanting to know if the coast is clear.' `´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´*:-.,_,-:*´`´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´* SECOND DEGREE Two blondes are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror and says, 'Hmm, this person looks familiar.' The second blonde says, 'Here, let me see!' So the first blonde hands her the compact. The second one looks in the mirror and says, 'You dummy, it's me!' `´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´*:-.,_,. -:*´`´*:-.,_,-:*´`´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´* THIRD DEGREE A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door she finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really angry. She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she is overcome with grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her head. The boyfriend yells, 'No, honey, don't do it!!!' The blonde replies, 'Shut up, you're next!' `´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´*:-.,_,-:*´`´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´* FOURTH DEGREE A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals. She proudly says, 'Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them.' A friend says, 'OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin ?' The blonde replies, 'Oh, that's easy: W.' `´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´*:-.,_,-:*´`´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´* FIFTH DEGREE What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant? 'Is it mine?'
`´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´*:-.,_,-:*´`´*:-.,_,.-:*´`´* SIXTH DEGREE Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit, patrolling nearby was the first to respond. As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps. Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, 'I come home to find all my possessions stolen. I call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a BLIND policeman.'
A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, 'Everyone who thinks they're stupid, stand up!' After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. The teacher said, 'Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?' 'No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!'
* * * * * * * * * * *
Little Johnny watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her face. 'Why do you do that, mommy?' he asked. 'To make myself beautiful,' said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue. 'What's the matter?' asked Little Johnny. 'Giving up?'
* * * * * * * * * * *
The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn't paying attention in class. She called on him and said, 'Johnny! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?' Little Johnny quickly replied, 'NBC, FOX, ESPN and the Cartoon Network!'
* * * * * * * * * * *
Little Johnny's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the 10 most wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person. 'Yes,' said the policeman. 'The detectives want very badly to capture him.' Little Johnny asked, 'Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture ?'
* * * * * * * * * * *
Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse's legs and rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Johnny asked, 'Dad, why are you doing that?' His father replied, 'Because when I'm buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy. Johnny, looking worried, said, 'Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom .'
> > IN STALLING A HUSBAND > > Dear Tech Support , > > Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a > distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the > flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under > Boyfriend 5.0 . > > In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, > such as > * Romance 9.5 and > * Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such
> as > * NBA 5.0, > * NFL 3.0 and > * Golf Clubs 4.1 . > > Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2. 6 simply crashes
> the system. > > * Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these > problems, but to no avail. > > What can I do? > > Signed, > > Desperate. > > > > DEAR DESPERATE , > > First, keep in mind, > * Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while > * Husband 1.0 is an operating system. > > Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download > Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. > * If that application works as designed, Husband1.0 should then > automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. > > However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband > 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5 , Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1 . > * Please note that Beer 6. 1 is a very bad program that will download > the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta. > > Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law > 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize > control of all your system resources.) > > In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 > program.These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0 > . > > In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited > memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider > buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We > recommend > * Cooking 3.0 and > * Hot Lingerie 7.7. > > Good Luck Babe! > > Tech Support > > >
e mails, im sending e mails, but i think their is a delay in getting them, i have beem messaged, but mine dont seem to be openining, when i check their unread, and i feel that the person thinks im rude not replying
Are you looking or interested in ancestry?
Anyone interested in finding their Irish Ancestors?Do you wonder if they may be looking for you?
There is information out there, but all genealogy sites charge fees, and no guarantee they will have any information.
Everyone asking questions anywhere online could help you or some one else.
I write this because so many people looking for their relatives.
Will.