I agree that it sounds like she is not ready for a relationship. But 9 years sounds like long enough to be able to move on if she's ready. I don't know, but in my opinion if she has not moved past this to be with another man then it may never happen. Maybe you should just back off for now. Since you have feelings for this woman it will only hurt you worse in the end if she never moves on. You deserve to have someone that is ready for what you want and feels the same way about you.
RE: what do yah think?
Very nice