Its working for me, first Australia to Indonesia, then she went to China for a year to study!
I'm lucky as I can travel to be with her, but only for visits, though last one was 2 months, next one in China will be 6 weeks. Thank God for Skype, it keeps us sane, contact every day, at no cost!
Its not with out its frustrations, though and its noy the same as in the flesh (so to speak).
MMM....its strange you post this, because I'm in that situation with my partner right now. She's in China and I'm in Australia and its difficult for her to organise how we will live life after she finishes her studies, so she says to me....please will you do it. I was uncomfortable with this at first, being a sharing sort of person, but realised that she really meant it. She's not passive, but she trusts me and I think that is the essence of a good relationship, which the OP illustrates. Also, I'm in a better position to do this than she is and she understands that.
I think Perth is about as good as it gets, great climate, lots of jobs, fabulous beaches, some of the best wine in the country....I know, I'm a bit biased!
I think Perth is about as good as it gets, great climate, lots of jobs, fabulous beaches, some of the best wine in the country....I know, I'm a bit biased!
Thats fabulous Ron, sounds like you're enjoying your retirement to the fullest! I've been in small boats all my life and sold my last one about 5 years ago, now into travelling WA by 4WD and camper trailer with a kayak.
I know, its not easy when you are still hurting, but you'd be surprised at just how many people there are around you who care about you.....and they have friends!!!!
I am doing just that right now...I'm now in Kalimantan Indonesia with someone I met in another site about 8 m0nths ago. We have had much Internet contact and when I was in Indonesia in May, I spent 2 weeks with her. We got on very well and I have returned for 6 weeks....that should find out if we can get on!!
Unfortunately, as luck will have it, she goes to China for a year to study, so I guess that's my next trip!
We have issues of culture, language, acceptance in rather traditional culture of foreigners and I'm sure there will be other issues we will discover (where we might live together is looking like one of those). I feel we will overcome them, as we both want to and are committed to each other.
Good luck to anyone contemplating a relationship with someone in anoyher country and of another culture.
This really is an interesting topic and I hope it stimupates an good discussion,I am sure there will be many different opinions.
My wife died, after a long illness, when my 2 daughters were 4 and 7 so I stopped work until my youngest daughter was at primary school, although I did return to work parttime before that. I really had no alternative to staying at home and I was glad I was able to. However, it did put a strain on finances as I still had a mortgage to pay.
Prior to her illness, my wife and I both worked, she was able to work parttime, which meant she was around when our eldest was home from school and at pre-school. However, we were never very happy with day-care and eventually employed a wonderful middle aged lady to look after the girls, while we worked. This was by far the best arrangement we had, until we went for a year to the UK, where the kids endured some of the worst day care centres imaginable!!
Of course, my mother in law was always happy to look after the girls, especially as when we came back from the UK we lived very close to her. This has meant that she has been able to develop a very close relationship with her grand children which has endured to this day (she's now 90 and the younger daughter is living with her after returning from living in the UK!). The reason I mention this is that grandparents are so important in the lives of their grand kids and so often play a supportive role in caring for them.
All in all, I think I did what was both in the girls interests and mine and I feel most parents try to get that balance right. My girls seem to have turned out OK, though neither have children of their own....yet!
Well done Kizzy, I'm sure you wiil quickly realise that it is very easy to grasp the basics if sailing and when you get confidence, the fun really starts!!
I have been involved in sailing boats all my life, my last one was 35 feet, comfortable and safe. Unfortunately, the sailing conditions in the wast coast are often very tough, much wind and rough seas in summer, not many places to go. I've always envied Queenslanders their marvellous sailing areas and almost moved there.
I'd be there with you in a flash to help you get started (in sailing!), but I'm in hot and steamy Jakarta at the moment.
Enjoy yourself and send regular reports od voyages (of all sorts).
Oh, and let the blokes come to you, only pick the one who know how to navigate properly!
Well, what a surprise....I've been away in Indonesia on one of my trips and havn't logged in for ages.....and I see this!! Thanks for remembering me, it makes me feel so good, especially from the depths of Kalimantan!
Kawai, I'd date you any day, but it would have to be long distance!
Well, this is an interesting and relevant (for me) question. Maybe others will be interested in my situation.....if not stop reading right now!!
I have been in a distance relationship with a woman in Indonesia for about 18 months, principally via the internet. I go often from Australia to Indonesia and decided it was time to visit my friend who lives in Kalimantan. I have been here now a week and it has been extraordinary to see how our relationship has developed and grown. We were both very unsure about how it would go, but we are pleasantly surprised at the progress we have made. That is despite language, cultural and other differences. Obviously there are uncertainties ahead...I have to return to Australia when my visa expires and she may be going to China to study for a year in August. So, you can see that the future is anything but certain.
I would not think long distance relationships are for everyone and they certainly are fraught with difficulties, which can be frustrating.
Id be interested to hear about others' experiences.
What a perfect view of things....mine exactly, couldn't have expressed it better myself.
I appreciate the feeling of other posters that they would want to live long enough to see their children grow up and to be able to assist and guide them.....sadly my wife did not and it was her greatest sorrow that she would not, I felt so much for her. Fortunately, I have survived to see them grow up, very succesfully too, but I dont want to hang around if I'm old and frail. Maybe I'll think differently then, though.
I dont want to hi-jack this thread, but what do people think about euthenasia? I feel the subject is a relevant extension of the thread.
Kizzy, I read and reread your original post. In my opinion (thats all, no more), you are developing a fairly normal relationship....from a man's perspective. I would hazard a guess that if asked, he would say that the relationship was going really well. He would probably say that you and he were gradually getting closer and that his trust in you was growing. I would think that he has no idea that you are (or may be) unhappy with how things are going.
The fact that you feel comfortable with the developing relationship is great and I'm sure he would agree, but I think he would be surprised you are uncertain. I suspect (could be wrong!) that he imagines your relationship is progressing well. Its just a mans way of moving along the way to something closer. He shared an important piece of information with you....that he was going out with mates for a drink....this is significant to him, even if it seems trivial to you. Its a positive sign, showing he may be ready to share other important things....like he cares for you, but that may take somewhat longer to be acknowledged.
Be patient with him....he is a mere male and values different things. Be careful how you confront his seeming lack of response, it may upset him and drive him away.
Hang in there, Kizzy, play him carefully and he will get on your wavelength soon (hopefully).
We wait the next instalment with interest.
Kizzy, please dont take offence at my humorous take on your relationship, I genuinely hope this man is the right one for you. I hope when you meet that your obvious mutual attraction is realised.
oztrack Forum Posts (147)
RE: More Uses For Apple Cider Vinegar!!!
I hear the Chinese use it quite a lot for health reasons