goldengloss Forum Posts (389)

RE: What prevents you from living the life you truly desire?

I didnot take some great opportunites to go to the States etc., when I was 30. Was left to look after my Grandma [who reared me]. Guilt. She had a wonderful life, I wanted to live mine. Anyway, now its financial fear,I really want to leave Dubin but like NNenagh says, am full of 'what if' I have a huge desire to go and live in Wexford, I love it.

RE: What prevents you from living the life you truly desire?

Being the age I am but still wanting a change... it gets harder as you get abit older. I want to up and move sticks, there are practicalities am I making excuses? maybe

RE: What prevents you from living the life you truly desire?

I put down financial constraints, I think truthfully there is alot of fear about leaving the safety zone.

RE: off the beer since nov the 1st, and in remission of mental health smytoms

Hi was simply congratulating you . I have a friend who drinks on her medications and have had to take her to hospital when she mixed the two.
I don't think you took my advise as insulting? I surely didnot mean to insult your intelligence but not all Doctors dont tell you not to mix the two, the medication and the Booze.
You can be happy without it. A support Group of people living with the same probs as you can be positive, uplifting and you get contacts and are given practical and proper help for dealing with emotions etc.,
I wish you luck. x

RE: off the beer since nov the 1st, and in remission of mental health smytoms

New to Forums... very late replying. Dont watch the Beer Adverts on Tv or in Movies and don't be tuanted back to drink, it doesnt mix well with your medication for your mental Distress.
REally glad to hear that you are feeling good. The Alcohol contraindicates with the lithium if thats what you are on, also Xprexa, and all the other mood stabilisers, SSRI antidepressants so be wise and look after you mental health really wishing you well. Support Group would be great.

RE: storm

OOh the winds up here in South County Dublin. I feel that the roof is going to come in, being a cottage, the place is shaking, going to bed.
Keep warm and safe all.

RE: What is most important to you on a first date?

Good Manners, extremely important, if you're meeting in a bar, its nice for the man to stand up and shake your hand, open doors, help you with your jacket, these things arenot as common as they used to be and bad manners for me is a total turn off. The person has to be themselves, I hate pretentiousness and stilted conversation, I always meet for one hour for a coffee so I can say 'thank you' and make a fast getaway. I have been on a couple of awful Dates where the men have had no manners, no respect for women, and have been obviously looking for a leg over.
Thankfully, most men on CS are lovely. I don't meet for a Date so much now though unless I feel there is something in common as its an awful waste of emotional energy.

RE: How often do you go with your gut feeling?

Sometimes I get a very strong Gut Feeling about somebody, it could be just somebody Ive been introduced to, My gut feelings have never been wrong. They're the animal left in us and they are never wrong.
Sometimes I wish they were wrong when I fancy the wrong man but you can't rationalise yourself out of a gut feeling. So dont fight it.

Do you have unrealistic expectations in your search for a partner ?

I have a friend who is 70, attractive, she said recently 'I am holding out for Mr. Tall,Dark and Handsome, and he has to be rich. This is what really got me to write this Forum. I have found speaking with women who are of a certain age DO still hold on to dreams. Unrealistic and Hollywood-ish.
Me? I think perhaps, having been very hurt.I am dipping my toe in the water, with perhaps a fear of going in at all.
It's imperative not to rely on C.S. alone, I think to meet a man or woman in an everyday unpredictable way is a far more natural setting and we can be more ourselves. 5minutes in person is worth 100emails. When I said unrealistic expectations, I didnot mean Lowering our standards. But ageing should entail losing silly lists liek the one my freind has above. By going on the external and buy having lists in our heads, and predjudices we narrow our hope of meeting somebody compatible considerably.

Do you have unrealistic expectations in your search for a partner ?

Jono that is lovely and how I try to live, not in the past , it is full of if onlys and regrets, the furture can cause anxiety and needless worry but to live in the present, in the now, is what I try and do. Mindfulness.
I don't think it is wrong to have dreams. We need dreams to sustain us, dont most great ideas, films, stories, whatever, start with a dream? You can dream of the type of man you would like, thats ok, I was talking about having unrealistic expectations and wants. As in looking for perfection or thereabouts, the way romantic films portray love and dating.
The reality being totally different. Thanks for your input.

Do you have unrealistic expectations in your search for a partner ?

Jono that is lovely and how I try to live, not in the past , it is full of if onlys and regrets, the furture can cause anxiety and needless worry but to live in the present, in the now, is what I try and do. Mindfulness.
I don't think it is wrong to have dreams. We need dreams to sustain us, dont most great ideas, films, stories, whatever, start with a dream? You can dream of the type of man you would like, thats ok, I was talking about having unrealistic expectations and wants. As in looking for perfection or thereabouts, the way romantic films portray love and dating.
The reality being totally different. Thanks for your input.

RE: Wind Turbines in Rural Ireland

Orien3 Thanks for that comment, I have watched a programme where a woman was giving out about wind turbines in an adjacent field. She kept on about the hum. The programme was on the the RTE stations [could have been Ear to the Ground] anyway.... like you have just said, there are bound to be vested interests. I would indeed be interested [and will arrange] to go and see these turbines for myself. Ive only seen them from Cars. This woman was really agitated by the 'incessant humming'. Some people are v sensitive to noise but if I can live with the noise from my Fridge/Freezer [which gets on alot of peoples nerves] and ticking clocks around my cottage, I think its a small price to pay for being kinder to Mother Earth.

RE: Wind Turbines in Rural Ireland

Hi, I live on the East Coast [Dublin south] plenty of wind up here where I live in Sandyford [near the mountains] but alot of TDs living here too and perhaps it would ruin their vista from their large garden rooms ? and there is that whining hum that people living beside them [within any type of close proximity] have been complaining about, seemingly it does get to you after a while. I would prefer it to Nuclear and by God this is a wet, windy country.
I just hope they don't put a rash of them in scenic spots. I would keep an eye on Tipperary, its a lovely part of Ireland, Kerry,West Cork etc.,

RE: If U were to paint a big garden fence who of the CS members would U like to be beside helping

Truheart, I was born in UK by the way. I am same as you. People say 'hey whats a woman doing painting her own hall door? or digging her ownflower bed or Veggie Bed and they are shocked, Don't you have family [No they are a waste of space and live in UK - OFficial] some families should have a Government health warning so I do things myself coz if I dont i will either have to pay some eejit to do it and he will make a mess of it. So ike Truheart, even though the old knees creak abit, I get down and sand and paint and garden and that includes the fence and gate !!!!

RE: Political Correctness

Thank you for that !! a brilliant piece by Stephen Fry, although there he does tend to [being articulate and having a rather artistic, histrionic nature] take about 10mins to say what he could have said in 3.
Actors like the sound of their own voices.... Ego. Having said that great clip and thank you for that !!!

Do you have unrealistic expectations in your search for a partner ?

Thanks again for all the latest posts. Somebody said someone i can live with. I think thats a reasonable expectation but you don't find out the real person until well into the relationship.
On CS there are really Crude men and I think it comes either shyness, a false arrogance or simply immature and feeling its their right to ask you about your physical assets [showing a total disregard for interests etc] but there is always the Bock/delete and i dont bother with them and they dont bother me anymore.
I feel that my expectations were unrealistic but are now
I want a man with similar tastes, that's important -different but alike
Same sense of humour is a great bonus for me as is a love of music.
An affectionate man with an old sense of values... in the beginning
anyway. A friendshp, somebody who could become your very best friend
things you love to do together, A man who treats you well and visa
Versa.Inside is more important , I realise as ive gotten older
Looks are only so important and after that its the person inside.

Do you have unrealistic expectations in your search for a partner ?

thanks for all your replies..... Glad you all having a good time. Some very good posts there... I liked the one about friendship being paramount and best to start of with same. i believe that too. If a man seems nice but isnt what you had in mind, but seems nice, honest, fun, good conversationalist,affectionate and if there is just the tiniest spark and he has manners, I think now [I didnt always] give him a chance, let a friendship grow... when a relationship grows on the soil of friendship, it has a great chance of surviving and getting through the bad stages.
Me? I have had stupid expectations in the past and yet, went for a really bad guy in the end.
As for the next guy who asks me my Cup Size or asks me have I big ones ?
I will tell him I am a 44DD and put phone down, leave him panting....

Do you have unrealistic expectations in your search for a partner ?

Kendall42 you make perfect sense and thanks for answering my question Good luck on the site.

Do you have unrealistic expectations in your search for a partner ?

I have been back [after a longterm relationship] on this site for a few months. What has struck me, apart from the huge influx of scammers using other peoples photos [mainly American photos] I want to ask you do you think as a man or woman that your expectations are unrealistic? too high?
This can bw a way of avoiding true intimacy but also in my humble opinion a side effect of the Media with its focus on perfection in relationships, the 'happy ever after' scenario, and I am amazed at men in the over 50s and 60s bracket looking for 'ladies of 40' .Would love your comments

RE: why is there so much corruption in goverment in ireland

Kennyfrom Dublin Hi you make alot of sense in particular to the Culture etc.,, very well writen . it deals on the ground with probs.

RE: why is there so much corruption in goverment in ireland

Just on the subject of Supermarkets, they are very much regulated by Governments, via Minimum wage as somebody mentioned and of course there is acoountability regarding food sources and incoming meats, foods etc., [Dept of Agriculture] would we get rid of that ? Food safety board, the list is endless. As I said too long and detailed to get into but anyone who thinks that Ireland could run itself.... well all you need do is watch the amount of people talking on mobiles in Cars, and driving whilst drunk, Whats that got to do with Governing ourselves ? Everything. We are not people who would be particularly good at governing ourselves and Anarchy doesnt work because as Ive said and said all along people are selfish and theres always one or even a bundle [a govt?] who will want more of what the others have. Human Greed causes Govts to be a necessary Evil.. The whole debate is abit Student like for me. When you've lived in the real world and dealth with as many people and seen what can happen when people get into power the lofty ideals of a work together co - op type Ireland just drifts into Fantasy land. Happy Days all

RE: why is there so much corruption in goverment in ireland

Hi, I happen to paint as well so there is great Freedon in Art/painting and self expression. I totally agree that we governed ourselves wayback when and we were known as the Land of Saints and Scholars, I just don't think it could work, for a myriad of reasons. Yes, the Internet DOES need to be regulated. for Gods sake !! I don't want to have to spell out all the reasons, the abductions, children being taken in by perverts etc.,
What is your alternative to sit up, be nice? A certain amount of politeness is badly needed from what I see on buses and towards the elderly. Gone are the days when my Grandma would tell me to go over and get the shopping list from my elderly neighbour and I was forbidden to take money for doing it. Was that so bad ? As for being Brainwashed, I have never met anyone who wasnt to some extent. Media is a very subtle tool as is Media. Its a very complex issue and I believe cannot be tackled adequately in this Forum. One basic issue of brainwashing would be the tryanny of ageing [mostly women but spreading to the male too] and the obsession with youth, botox, facelifts, this is more sinister than it looks, on the surface [pardon pun]. ~ Again its driving people from a point of fear 'nobody will love you' 'you must be thin and beautiful to be loved' [buy our products, get your teeth done for 20K and you will be adored ] ~ As somebody who has a little experience in counselling in the Drug arena can I say you are wrong about Drug addiction being treated not as a medical condition... every Drug Centre here has Alternative Therapy, Nutrition lessons, Budgeting, proper DeTox with Therapy, Art Therapy etc., so you are wrong there.
It is bad with our present governors if you could call them that but without anyone???? Mayhem. The Drug Situation wouldnt cease if heroin was legalised, you still have Greed. Think Oil. Think Gold. The fault is with Human Nature and the majority of people are afraid, want to be led, dont want to have to make huge life changing decisioins, like being told how to act, love following trends, and dont think too deeply. So, it is because of human nature our country became flawed [and historic issues made us a cap in hand people]. When Decency, altruism,Humanity, equality, no need to be boss, to be richer pervails, then we have some hope, until then.... it would be inviting mayhem. Which I guess we already have only its a hidden type of mayhem and quiet desparation.Hope I am making sense. Thanks for the discussion I do appreciate the points made and youve made a very good case.

RE: why is there so much corruption in goverment in ireland

P.S. sorry post was so long - MARY LOU WAS INFACT IN THE PROGRESSIVE DEMOCRATS. YOU CAN CHECK IT OUT IF YOU WANT. I REMEMBER HER WELL.

RE: why is there so much corruption in goverment in ireland

Hi Snowlynx and MadDog, Thanks for your comments. Firstly, Snowlynx, i'm afraid i read your post quickly today and i always write straight from the heart. I don't ponder enough as in, I didnot articulate what I was trying to say, also time, the amount of space alloted here on a forum doesnt really do any favours to such a huge concept... that of self Government.
Firstly, MadDog, 'dont know where you got the impression that I am somewhat of a middle class Socialist/leftie lol. If you read my posts I specifically said that I was totally disallusioned with Governments and Trade unions. OR words to that effect. I was perhaps niave to put down the fact that I was involved to some extent in street protests, I was a member of various very leftWing Groups, and was a Connolly Youth Movement menber, Communist for awhile. But I didnot put this down as a brave statement or as if to say 'I know it all' .... I dont !! Far from it, the more I learnt and watche as people got into power and 'moved on' or 'grew up ' as you rightly say, I saw them take big jobs with huge salaries and become like the people and Capitalists they purported to hate !!!I thought I made that clear? No you got me wrong guys, I am not a leftie. I am not a University graduate and am mainly self schooled and very well read [so you ignore the typhos and spelling errors] they come from the fact that I have Arthritis in my hands and also, I walked away from the Toxic School system at a very very young age.
I dont mean to be rude but I am not going to do a CV for somebodys amusement [no offence meant] Cyberland is not safe and you dont know who is reading this. I may be blonde, but i am not dumb.
I think it is a pity that Socialism cannot be the order of the day, many of the facets of same are infact Christianity and basic humanity towards our fellow beings. I despair now of our country and don't think Anarcy is the answer, I would love to hark back to the days of Saints and Scholars and you rightly said people came to be educated here. Now we send our kids to Speech and Drama to get them to speak with a Westbrit accent. 'Pocket of Crosps' type accent !!!
I would be v interested to know how you would go about this self governing in the present climate of Crime, selfishness, Americanisation via Advertising/TV drivel we are fed. Thanks for reading this x

RE: why is there so much corruption in goverment in ireland

Ah ! Rolex Socialists I love that phrase !! When I was in the Republican side of things [innocent days long time ago] and really believed in Marxism and that these were real freedom fighters, before I understood Communism/State Capitalism etc., I was horrified to see alot of these x members go into the trade union movement and watched in horror as these 'Barstool socialists' drove around in Beemers and had undisclosed salaries[no its not a new phenomena with C.Remedial Clinic] I became dissallusioned with all those who got into power.
With regard Mary Lou. How could you possibly trust somebody who was in the Progressive Democrats and then crossed hedges to Sinn Fein, its like black and white surely ? an appropriate political move as they needed a middle class face.However, she sells herself as being 'for the underclass , the unemployed and against quangos, however recent coverage [including photos] showed her hosting a very posh bash in New York and believe me, Sinn Fein know how to cream off the political Petty cash box too. i think it is an insult to think the middle class have been fooled by Mary Lou, to me anyway, she is transparent, Gerry has his Bolthole in Donegal where he can retire to with his pension. Gawd it gets worse.
Agree with writer about Pearse Doherty.

RE: Being accepted....

Can I take it from your photo that you have made it, become successful in your business? so now you are the target of jealousy? i may be wrong, just a feeling. often when you work hard and become more confident and start to enjoy the fruits of your labour, or luck, people begin to dislike you, for many reasons. Do you think you might have changed abit? to people who are still poor it can be hard to be in your company as you were once like them perhaps, [i may be wrong] but it is hard for them to listen to your new lifestyle and material wealth trappings .You have to ask yourself are you sharing with family?
I am not jealous of wealth because I know it brings with it alot of other problems, friends cannot keep up with you socially and so they fall away and again, jealousy. It is good to have a job that brings you rewards but does it bring you happiness ?
I wish you happiness and peace.

RE: why is there so much corruption in goverment in ireland

Hi FacetowardsFront, I agree with what you say about the Education system and the brainwashing that takes place in our school system, and the sit up, be good etc., however I dont think that Anarcy is the answer either. There are at least a dozen good people [not politicians] who could run this country. Get rid of Quangos, run it like a business, put Agriculture back to where it should be and stop bending and bowing to Germany. We survived before them. As for Sheepie. Doh !I have been a militant political animal all my life and never a yes woman. However, being of a certain age, I am being honest when I say, i am totally disallusioned with all parties, people change when they get power and privilidge.
The worst seem to be the Socialist parties. Green party was a joke, an embarrassment, Mary Harney did more for the Air pollution in the 80s than Greens ever did. Again, look to Iceland.... people power. I'm here waiting but apathy reigns as ive already said. People are prepared to be walked on.

RE: why is there so much corruption in goverment in ireland

The next Election is for European only. Not a general election. Forgive me if I am wrong. unfortunately it would be a great pleasure to kick out the present crew but they aren't worried they will retire [should they wish] with a large pension.... yes, those who wore the Red Rose and used phrases like 'Labours way or .....' and Comrades, and we will stop the cronyism of Fine Fail.

RE: why is there so much corruption in goverment in ireland

Sofarsogood74 Well said ! I agree with you totally. What really upsets me is that the most vulnerable, the elderly,children with disabilities, cutbacks for carers of children with disabilities, etc., etc., the quangos [already mentioned] in HSE [one of the most ineffective cash guzzling middle man orientated organisations], I think FF, Labour [whom I voted for and indeed was a member of, Finegael, have just become puppets to Germany. As somebody has already said in this forum, we are a laughing stock. Where else would blatant criminal Top Bankers etc., be paid for the debacle they created? and paid to ride happily into the sunset, it is perverse and yes Apathy is at the core. Where did we learn to be apathethic? Who taught us to be subservient? The Brits have been gone a long time now. So the blame game doesnt do us any favours

RE: why is there so much corruption in goverment in ireland

I know you have to have abit of humour to lighten things... but why does everything have to come back to personal attack ? I find some of the comments here really annoying.... people trying to be funny and having a laugh. The Economy and the fact that 2 generations will still be paying off the excesses and depravity of our Govt. and their Banking cronies and Building cronies and all the appalling apartments built with migrant workers [mainly ukraine and polish men ]. HAHA great fun.... until you have to go into hospital like I did, bring in your own medicines as in painkillers [because of cutbacks] come in to the hospital in an ambulance and yet wait 3 days on a Trolley before Scans are taken.
Then wait another year before you actually get the operation [thanks to myself for going online/Tv] Dont want to get too personal. It is no laughing matter.
People seem to change when they get into power. I dont believe FF and SinnFein will get in, too many recent exposures about their highlife whilst in New York, whooping it up in best of hotels, dont think that went down with the Comrades..... nope we need fresh blood.