I am familiar with the first 3, Larry (eros, agape, and philia), but have never heard the word "storge" and did not see it mentioned in the link you posted. Did I miss something? Here in Greece, the distinction is clear between the different types of love. Generally, the words "agape" and "eros" are most often misunderstood or confused by others, but a Greek would never confuse the two. Interestingly, the word "philia" (a friendship kind of love) is a root of many of our words (as so many Greek words are). For example, any word that ends in "phile"....Anglophile, xenophile, even p*dophile...all reference a certain closeness or bond with a group, healthy or not. Also, consider "philanthropist"... whereas "anthropos" means, vaguely, "people"...a philanthropist is a friend to people, if you will. God, I love etymology (also a Greek word, the first 3 syllables meaning "true sense" and the last 2 meaning "word", again roughly translated.
I'm as old-fashioned as you are in this respect. It's one thing to "dispose" of a relationship that was proving itself to be not quite right...not worth trying to carry on, for whatever reason, as in its early days...or, irreparable, perhaps, as in a broken marriage. It's quite another thing, however, to be on a constant quest for something better (someone younger, prettier or more handsome, richer, better body). With such a quest, one will never be satisfied. There's always someone else out there who is more attractive, more wealthy, more youthful. The bounce from one to another is a shallow play, though, and I wonder if those who dance this dance will ever find happiness. I rather doubt it. Sometimes it's really a blessing to be left on the sidelines, simply enjoying the music.
"How do we know when our preferences are too inflexible or otherwise unreasonable?". Is it not fair to simply say "We just know"? How do we know when something is very RIGHT? Do we question it, do we try to second-guess it? Or do we simply recognize it and feel peace and contentment and joy from what we've found? In your examples (and it scares me that you know about my whacky neighbors!), Suzy Strange is stuck on the physical, which is an area where I am much more flexible. Beverly Odd also has mainly physical requirements, although she doesn't like people who don't like horses. Her requirement, I think, is a bit too rigid. If, however, she couldn't see being with someone who was cruel to animals, this I understand. This would be more of a moral issue. If I demand integrity in a man, am I being inflexible? If so, is this not the same as saying that I should be perfectly accepting of a man with no integrity? There are some things where flexibility is out of the question, in my mind. When it comes to character and personality, how much should one allow their standards to shift? Where do I draw the line? Shall I accept the inarticulate slob who swindles people in his business dealings and is arrogant and rude? Would I be ok with a man who exhibits an uncomfortable interest in little boys? I know I'm carrying this to a bit of an extreme, but I simply ask where the line should be drawn. I believe it should be drawn at one's own comfort level and requirements and I don't see this as inflexible in the least... only the natural way of things.
Ahhh, well this is a horse of a different color. The short answer (God, do I EVER give short answers??) is that I am most inflexible as regards personality/psychology-related qualities. Now, my spectrum is not so narrow as you might think, but outside of a certain range of suitability for me, I don't see myself able to bend. For what would be the point, Ambrose? If I don't feel mentally connected...if I don't feel that a man's personality is in synch with mine (not one and the same, but in synch), why lessen my standards (or, in fact, if he is the more intelligent, kinder one of us....why should he lessen HIS standards?). When personalities and values and beliefs are not compatible, it's a recipe for failure, I believe. If I'm bigoted, intolerant of others, and surly, what is the likelihood that I'll hit it off with a broad-minded man who is kind to strangers, the elderly, waiters, etc.? Am I realistic, given my unwillingness to waver in this regard? I don't think so. Quite the opposite, I believe. I think I am being MOST realistic. But I'd be interested (as always) in hearing your take.
In all sincerity (no fooling around), I would be pleased to show you around, as much as possible when I'm not at work. I love it here and I enjoy showing the best of Athens to visitors. There are many problems here and many frustrations to deal with, but there is still something magical here. There is a zest for life and enjoyment of simple pleasures that I dearly love. On top of that, the history is fascinating and there are some truly beautiful sights here (the islands and the colors of the sea are absolutely stunning); the food is fresh and tasty, the bouzouki music can lift spirits or touch the soul, the people are warm and friendly when you make an effort to get to know them, and the nightlife is rocking. Whether you spend an afternoon sipping coffee at a seaside cafe or you dance until 6:00 in the morning at a club, there is something for everyone. It saddens me that things here have become so problematic recently. Anyway, yes....if you come here and if I can help to show you around, I would be happy to.
I know that your comment is tongue-in-cheek, but for anyone who might indeed think that I am narrow-minded, I'm well prepared to comment. I'm hard-pressed, however, to imagine how anyone could think that a marriage between a 47-year old man and an 8-year old girl is acceptable in any culture. An arranged marriage is one thing, but with such a young child....it's just unacceptable to me.
Be sure to let me know if you plan to come for a visit. I'm a good tourguide and can help you sort out what to do and where to go, if you wish. Just leave your tights or kilts or whatever at home, ok?
Thanks, Krisha. I've been to Japan a few times (though I haven't lived there, but I have lived in Seoul and Taipei). Tokyo may be an option, but I have to wait and see what jobs will be available when it is time for me to bid on my next post.
Yummers! It's always those special holiday meals that I tend to miss the most. I can get some of our favorite American groceries at a little store we have at our Embassy, but some ingredients are hard to come by. And, by the way....you had me at seafood gumbo and Honeybaked ham! But the pecan pie definitely put it over the top!
I just had my lunch (actually, first thing I've eaten today)...a tomato sandwich! Enjoy your day and your meal!
I enjoy the tradition immensely. As for the religion itself, I don't have a solid opinion (either negative or positive) because I don't know enough about it to answer intelligently and also because I am not a religious person, in general. But, as for the traditional aspects, I have complete respect.
Having a suitor is a far cry from getting married and having the children's inheritance at risk. If the relationship becomes serious (and rarely does this really happen with such age differences, unless it's a total sham and the woman is completely naive), then yes, she needs to tell her grown children. Maybe they can convince her to protect her assets, at the very least. Relationships with such age differences happen, of course, but I don't think many of them lead to marriage based on genuine love for one another. Some, maybe, but likely only a very rare few.
Actually, I am not Orthodox. I am not Greek, Boban....I'm American, living in Greece, but I don't have any Greek blood and am not a citizen here, so I'm not Orthodox. I just have the pleasure of being able to experience the traditions and the beauty of the Orthodox Easter. It's very special.
John Malkovitch in "In The Line of Fire"....he has a way of being just as creepy and frightening as he is meant to be in his films, when he's the bad guy.
I know it's a tiresome subject to some, but I saw this item and simply felt compelled to post it. It really sickens me.
Saudi judge upholds man's marriage to 8-year-old By Mohammed Jamjoom CNN
(CNN) -- A Saudi mother is expected to appeal a judge's ruling after he once again refused to let her 8-year-old daughter divorce a 47-year-old man, a relative said.
Sheikh Habib Al-Habib made the ruling Saturday in the Saudi city of Onaiza. Late last year, he rejected a petition to annul the marriage.
The case, which has drawn criticism from local and international rights groups, came to light in December when Al-Habib declined to annul the marriage on a legal technicality. His dismissal of the mother's petition sparked outrage and made headlines around the world.
The judge said the mother, who is separated from the girl's father, was not the legal guardian and therefore could not represent her daughter, the mother's lawyer, Abdullah al-Jutaili, said at the time.
The girl's husband pledged not to consummate the marriage until the girl reaches puberty, according to al-Jutaili, who added that the girl's father arranged the marriage to settle his debts with the man, who is considered "a close friend."
I'm just having one of those "get 'er done" days...I did my taxes, wrote an employee award nomination, sent several email responses (I'm always behind!), uploaded some photos, ordered a new multi-region DVD player and a few History Channel DVDs that sounded good, washed some clothes, and am now trying to decide what to eat. Next week is the Greek Orthodox Easter, and I will do several things then. It's a bigger holiday here than Christmas is, and I look forward to it each year. I will go to a friend's home on Sunday and she will have many friends and family members over for lots of food and just a good time together. Her husband will be roasting the lamb on the spit outside and it will be abolutely yummy!
I love the way you wink at me...like there's something just between us, our own private understanding of something. Or, the flirtatious wink. In either case, I love the way you wink at me.
Thalassa Forum Posts (2,410)
RE: We ALL want Love, so what is Love?
I am familiar with the first 3, Larry (eros, agape, and philia), but have never heard the word "storge" and did not see it mentioned in the link you posted. Did I miss something?Here in Greece, the distinction is clear between the different types of love. Generally, the words "agape" and "eros" are most often misunderstood or confused by others, but a Greek would never confuse the two.
Interestingly, the word "philia" (a friendship kind of love) is a root of many of our words (as so many Greek words are). For example, any word that ends in "phile"....Anglophile, xenophile, even p*dophile...all reference a certain closeness or bond with a group, healthy or not. Also, consider "philanthropist"... whereas "anthropos" means, vaguely, "people"...a philanthropist is a friend to people, if you will. God, I love etymology (also a Greek word, the first 3 syllables meaning "true sense" and the last 2 meaning "word", again roughly translated.