Why do you say "separated is still married" ship? If a man and woman have gone their separate ways and have been so for years...do you really believe a piece of paper still validates a marriage that is long dead?
I'm sorry Fire but i agree with "Laura225" on her answer to you....it is more hurtful for sure...but your friends/family/co-workers was not the one who stood before man (and God?) and made promises to you...it was your SO...and if they chose to cheat on you...they are the ones to blame NOT the friends/family/co-workers....they did not have an obligation to you...but you're right its hurtful none the less because you trusted them....
I only mentioned Curvy in this thread as it was her story....but what i meant in my reply to you is that i DO NOT blame the third party in an affair...regardless of who it is.
If a man/woman cheats on their spouse...the person they are cheating with i could say has no morals or scruples to become involved with someone they know is married, but they owe that person nothing...it is the married person who chose to step outside the boundaries of marriage that is to blame...and that is why i said that the marriage was destroyed long before a third party got involved....
Wow! I can't believe that I didn't get bashed for saying i don't blame the third party....
And actually Costanza worded exactly how i feel....the third party may have no morals deciding to cheat with a married person, but they owe you nothing....and the marriage was destroyed long before the third party got involved
Why does it seem that heinous crimes committed around the Christmas season seem even more so heart breaking??
There is currently a case going on here in Toronto where a family of four has been murdered in their home....and it really made me depressed when the showed the family home....it had ribbons galore on the trees and shrubs outside...all in preparation for the Holiday Season...that they will never see....
I agree with you Walley...but i just want to add one thing....Curvy would not become the implement of destruction to that marriage...that marriage is already destroyed....and was destroyed the moment he strayed outside of his marriage to find female company other than his wife's....
Thanks for your kind words...it has been a very stressful week with this up in the air...
However, I was told yesterday that the district manager has decided to authorize the weekend off for me
They did not want to lose me and they don't want me to step down and they also mentioned that even though we all went through this this week, they were very impressed that i held my ground.....ALL FOR MY CHILDREN...
You are absolutely right...they are children behaving like children.....but then whose responsibility do you think it is to correct this behaviour? There is a huge difference between a crying baby, and a child having a tantrum in public....or crying because that is not where they want to be... The parents that decide it is worth it to abandon a cart of groceries because "Junior starts crying" are the parents who have taken their role seriously...its worth it to them to abandon their groceries to teach their children what is and isn't appropriate behaviour in public....
May i suggest that it is because you are an aunt out with your nephews on occasion that you can tolerate the behaviour...perhaps if you had to live with that behaviour day in day out 24/7, you too may find the necessity to teach them differently?
As for your comment "but who gives a S***!"....I do...it is the future generation i am raising here....
Yes it is...because children learn by example. And as I was saying to Blue on the thread of the same nature in the international forums the answers there is one of the reason we are raising an "unruly" generation of children...
When I joined this company back in June, I requested the time off in July on the "Company Calendar"...I did know about the "black out" period for December....what i thought it meant is that you were not GUARANTEED the time off, but now know it meant NO TIME OFF!! (So I cannot even switch shifts because every other manager has to work as well)
Like you Hug I have done this for the past 8 years...and i understand that it is "retail" (which is all they seem to be repeating to me...), however i chose retail, and stayed in it, because it was what accommodated my hours when the kids were much younger.
No children don't understand...but i know it has long term effects that you were "never there"....and then comes the day when you do have time for them...and they seem to be "never there".....
I feel i'm a good manager, and i believe they think that as well, I've even offered up my resignation....or even to step down from management...they can't believe i would go to those lengths, and don't want to "lose" me....I can't believe that all of this is over TWO DAYS out of the 365 that i dedicate to the company!!
It is my first experience working for a company where the holiday is not split between the managers (there are 4 of us) and all managers are expected to work.
I guess this is where the question came from. That all of us know it is the one "sure" thing in our life...that we will all die someday....but we all put it off and "avoid" thinking of it as if that will make it somehow disappear...
Now don't get me wrong...I don't advocate living your life based around the fact that you will die...but i've been questioning myself as to whether or not i respect my eventual death...as i do in respecting my life...
As someone else on here said....perhaps its the fear of the unknown....but none of us know what tomorrow brings...yet we live for it...plan for it....put away for it....
Long distance relationships definitely take more effort...more dedication...
However, if the trip is not "specifically" to meet her, then its not a "wasted" effort if it doesn't pan out (you said you're visiting relatives there as well right?)
Thanks Druid....you know there are times i can still hear the cicadas and smell those flowers on those summer mornings i was outside with the kids....and the sound of my children laughing
And to think that it ended in separation and divorce, bitter quarrels, and the heart wrenching sound of my children crying....
wikked Forum Posts (6,091)
RE: What is your choice?
I guess it would depend on what your priorities are....