I have always liked and dated younger men. My second husband was 21 years younger than me and for the most part it worked until he decided drinking was more fun than being a husband and a dad. A mature younger man - that is what I seek. I just click better with younger men and anyone I have dated over 48 or 50 (tried this many times, too!) has been a couch potatoe, lazy, drinks too much while watching sports or TV all the time. I find younger men more attentive, among other things and I enjoy that.
There is nothing wrong with you - most younger men have a "thing" to want to see what it is like with an "older" woman and when they do, they find they like it quite well. No drama, no baggage, good lovin' and nice times together.
Isn't it a shame that the general consensus here is ... scammers!?? That is all I seem to get - scammers, liars, posers, fakes. I really wish there could be something real about all this...but in the end, there is really nothing at all. Easier to spot them...but still, it gets old!
For some, I believe they want to get on here and get started -- not wanting to be bothered with "details". For others, like the scammers/fakers/posers - they write way way too much, about themselves, their kids and families and things. Then when the emails come, they contain part of what is on their profile, exactly as it is written.
I prefer to know a little about a guy from his profile, but more can come from chatting. A man with nothing much in his profile could also have something to hide!
Is it true that most men cannot read and comprehend what a woman puts on her profile before they make a fool of themselves responding? I post what I want - a man close to home, to meet, go out with, date, and see if there is a connection. I state that i prefer to date younger men, yet I continue to get old men, scammers/fakers/posers, who are so far away - it would not even be worth my precious time to give them a chance.
If you know what you want and post that as such - why do these guys continue to lie about "I can relocate for you", etc? I am tired of it.
I just wish to find a younger, REAL man, close enough to meet and go out with, who is interested in something other than dirty talk, lies, broken promises, and scamming! Is that even possible?????
My 10 y/o gets free lunches at school. I continually question them, but it is considered "balanced" for a child. They serve at one meal- pizza, cornbread, corn, macaroni and cheese, and banana - way way too much starch. No "real" vegis as corn is a starch! It is like this all the time - what they put on the menu they send home at the first of the month rarely matches what they serve. My child if often disappointed in what they end up serving! It is always way too much starch. It may say a veggie, but they end up with hamburgers on roll, corn, macaroni, piece of cake and breadsticks. I am serious! Breakfasts most times consist of breakfast burrito (full of junk and starchy bread) or a cinnamon roll with a banana, or something on that order - very starchy and caloric, full of carbs! I have no choice as it is free to her at this time and it works for us, but I balance all that by only a lean meat and veggies galore at dinner time. Even her snack is usually veggies when she comes in after school! That helps immensely.
What's hair color have to do with dating? I have wild hair - I love to make it colorful. Right now, it is hot red with white blonde in the front - I get so many compliments on my hair! I had it black with white/blonde/a bit of orange-red in front for a long while and was the talk of the town! lol
it matters not - he can be bald, have hair or any color, have long hair....curly, I don't care as long as he wants the same things I do...
I work in the medical field and see and know what second hand smoke can do to the "non-smoker". I do not smoke, but my ex did around me and our young daughter. He said it was "his right" to smoke where he wanted. I left him (not only for those reasons - he was a drunk, too). He still smokes when he has her (24 hours every 3 or 4 months - his choice) but I try to keep her and myself (quit cold turkey over 31 years ago and never went back) away from smokers. It is devastating what lung cancer can do to one who has never smoked, let alone one who has - you'd never want to go there!!!
I think your childhood has influence on how you grow up and how you act as an adult, but many changes can occur during that time, both positive and negative. I had a good childhood too, and now....so much horrible stuff has happened to me, there is NO way I could blame my childhood or my parents or siblings!!
Trying for change in my life has been horribly hard and being without a good man is another facet that is even harder for me. Enduring two awful marriages, being divored and now raising a young child totally on my own - well, I cannot blame that on my childhood. I have sisters, brothers and my parents are still married - 60 years and going strong - in their 70s!! Although things were not always "the best", they were good and I prospered and grew from those experiences. I am close to everyone of them still.
What has happened to me now is a result of bad choices in my life (and marriages) and the economy, losing my career job, and other things - but I continue to keep pushing forward! I don't dwell on my past or childhood - I think of the good memories and it brings a smile to my face...something that is not so prominent with me anymore... but I am trying!
I have a 10 y/o with my second husband. (the first and I have 3 in their 30s and were married 27 years!) After nearly 8 years of him drinking to oblivion every night (He still is a functioning alcoholic), going out to girly bars, not paying attention to either of us and constantly telling me he "did not want a child" (but did when we made a decision to have one!!!), I left and took her with me. It has nothing to do with God in my eyes. He is a dead-beat dad, pays nothing (doesn't feel he has to and the law refuses to make him), and does as he pleases. I, on the other hand, work 3 jobs, take good care of her every need, have no help and she is doing much better alone with me (a single mom) than if she were with him and his girlfriend he lives with of 2 plus years. I believe in God and although I do not attend church regularly, my child knows of Him and we pray together all the time. It still does nothing to make my ex help his daughter or do anything for her - it is fruitless to harp on it, he simply is a real dead-beat dad. Not much I can do but provide the best I can for her - which I am doing - whether God comes into it or not.
Ex pretended to like her when his parents and family were around (from out of state) but when we parted, not a single one of them had anything to do with her either. So... I believe it is about how you are brought up in younger days - your family life - that makes you a good or bad father (or mother). And if you had bad times and cannot change your ways, don't have a child with anyone. It is all in working it out for the good of the child...
I do not block anyone unless I am sure they are a scammer or they are bothering me excessively.
I post that I am looking for a man close to home. I do not want to be just friends and I know what I want and posted that. However, so many men on this site do not read or comprehend and I get emails all the time from guys a zillion miles away. When I write back and tell them I want someone close to home and do not want just a friend relationship (I have enough friends), some are fine with that, but some continue to write all this junk about making it work, love knows no distance and whatever. So, sometimes it comes that I may have to block them. It happens with US men and overseas men. I am not here to waste my precious time.
I think many women feel the same way - we are looking for someone close to home. I have done the long distance thing many many times, and truthfully (for me) it does not work!
I feel that long distance never works. Been there/done that. There are lies, broken promises and heartache that always goes along with it. I limit myself to men close to home - and it is posted on my profile. However, I never get anyone close to home (rarely) who is real and it is always men from a zillion miles away or scammers overseas. I did not put that as not accepting mail, etc, as I still read them and see what goes, but as for long distance - in my eyes, it is not a doable thing. I have had many men promise they would come meet me with "distance is not a problem if you are really in love" etc, etc; but it just never happens. There are always excuses and I put it out there right away that I am not at liberty to travel at this point in my life...so why bother?
I would love to be in loved and loved by a man the way I would love him! I believe I am much happier when I feel that I am loved and appreciated and wanted and needed! I dislike the lonely feeling I have all the time because I have no one special in my life - that wonderful blissful feeling that you mean something to a man!
I really think I have never fully been in love before and now I want to find him and show him how much I have to give. When I read from others who are in love or see happy couples, I feel that I really am missing out on something fabulous and I want to find that!
I have not found anything on here but emails from scammers, posers and fakes. I am beginning to wonder just what is going on . I attract them it seems. I have not met one real person from here - not met anyone offline for that matter. If someone seems real, he is too far away!
Some days I just feel like letting it all go and stopping the search...but then, how will I ever find my true love? I am not having luck on the home front.
It is very disheartening and discouraging.
I have been told to "lower the standards" or to look further away - why should I have to compromise what I want? I did that twice (two marriages) before and look what that got me - heartache, misery, and divorce. I want what I want.....can't be helped and I feel I deserve someone nice, sweet, loving, etc., etc.! Someone close enough to get together and date, see where it goe. Why should we have to change what we want?
in truth.... I believe I have not talked to one man who has not been some king of faker/poser/scammer as yet on here. I can spot most, but some I thought were "real" - those get jerked out of my email as "scammers" or whatever. (so admin says).
Well, now - there are many things I agree with on this thread here. But...
I have been in my communities medical field for 40 years now - urgent care, private practice, hospital, etc. Never in my right mind did I ever expect to lose my career job with an email when the hospital downsized...but I did. What a shock! I am in my 50s and now considered "unemployable" as I made a lot of good money and was very good at what I did, but now places want someone right out of school, with little or no training, who will take a small pittance to start work (no family or responsibilities, etc). I see this all the time in the 100 or so interviews i have had in the past couple months and dealings with all types of employers and situations.
Point being - I had to go to the social services for help with feeding my family (I have a small child with a dead-beat dad and support other family members for reasons I will not go into here). I never in my right mind thought this would happen to me!!! I had (yes I lost it, and have something much much less, but it is a vehicle) a fabulous SUV, nice home (foreclosure) and other things and have been "looked down on" by the others with their bling, perfect done nails, internet phones and great clothing because I had things and am older, etc. I am no young chick and don't wear flashy clothing or have "done nails" or whatever - I am struggling and am only able to keep my internet because I had paid it forward a few months ago.
Without a job, you can do nothing; and I can barely get any help because I am "older". I have medical health issues - no insurance. I have food issues and got a wee bit of help there. I need rent and electric and such - but.... again I am older and get told this all the time.
I am now holding 3 jobs to try to make ends meet for what I made at one job only 5 hours a day in the medical field. I am exhausted and tired all the tinme and never have much family time.
Yes, the system needs a big revamp. I wrote a huge letter to authorities in my capital and also DC and gave them some wonderful ideas to "clean up the system" but got not one single reply - sent it to the congressment and senators, too. I know what I am talking about and have super good ideas on the subject! Several doctors in my area encouraged me to write!
You cannot even imagine what I have seen at the social services office and the waits of 3-6 hours to put in paperwork in person (as required here) are horrible for someone like myself who is holding 3 part-time petty paying jobs, but I do it and I do it with a smile - I have paid all my life for others to have benefits paid to them, it is time I get a little back...but believe me -it is hard and NO picnic.
Move on... it's not worth the heartache when people make stupid decisions (such as blocking you). Your life is YOUR OWN and live it YOUR WAY and ENJOY!
Family is family but in some cases (and it happens in mine, too) it is just better to go about your own way and let them live their lives and you live yours the best you can.
I state I am looking for a man close to home and I only get ones from New York, New York; California, Colorado or overseas... yeah right. They do not read profiles at all. I like the ones who said "I have one kid and I love him very much, he is all I got" or something to that effect - then I am sure...! lol
Another thing -putting email or Yahoo addys in the first email!!
It happens all the time, especially on these dating sites. From the beginning, it is unstable. When you finally do meet someone - then you can take it from there. I know how you feel, I want someone too and I keep getting disappointment, scammers, fakes amd hurt but I move on. We have to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off and start all over again. Disheartening -- I know, but we just have to move on. I believe there is someone out there for everyone...we just have to find that!
I agree..change your nick on here - crazy is not a good thing in the name and 21... leave that out. Just find something better to use as your name.
It is hard to find someone on these sites - the scammers and fakes take trust from us. I keep searching and you should too. Talk to people in the email and chat, blog or post here as that helps you too. Read profiles and don't respond to ones you cannot live up to - not worth it!!
The online dating world if very disheartening and hurtful...but as I still believe, there is someone out there for everyone (I am beginning to wonder about myself, though...lol) and you just have to seek until you find...it takes time but hang in there.
Honesty around this site is not a prominent thing I find. I think you should be honest - to the core! There is rarely sometimes a place for that "little white lie" but we all know that will only escalate again and again....then what do you have?
to each his own....I am looking for a committment...maybe not marriage this time around. But it is the perogative of the one searching as to what they want, how they feel about it, and where it goes.
I want happiness and freedom too, but I would rather be committed in one relationship with one great man....that's how I see it. I can still be happy and still have freedom....just need that specialness, too, of being with only one man.
That is all I get on here....scammers and fake profiles, lies and empty promises. Sometimes it is good for a laugh. Sometimes...it is just down right rude.
the scammers - almost every single man I have spoken to on this website has been a scammer - a lot of their profiles just disappear after a few chats...lol. Getting easier to spot them now of course.
Wish there were some close to home real nice younger guys on here...
I know just where you are coming from. I have had more than my share of this exact thing on here (and other sites). I seem to attract those types of men on here. They talk the talk and and when it comes time to really do something, they have lied and given me empty promises and yes - it does hurt!
The best thing that I can offer is to not let your guard down, move on, stick with it and find your true love. It is very hard to know who is a "scammer" and who is not, with all the photos, etc, and trying to figure out if what they are saying is really true. But I also found that if I do not keep going and searching for my true love, that I won't find him eventually - if I do not continue to make the effort.
Good luck and keep your chin up. I believe there is someone out there for each and every one of us....some of us just have a much harder time finding that someone special!
Kittt Forum Posts (29)
RE: Older Women!
I have always liked and dated younger men. My second husband was 21 years younger than me and for the most part it worked until he decided drinking was more fun than being a husband and a dad. A mature younger man - that is what I seek. I just click better with younger men and anyone I have dated over 48 or 50 (tried this many times, too!) has been a couch potatoe, lazy, drinks too much while watching sports or TV all the time. I find younger men more attentive, among other things and I enjoy that.There is nothing wrong with you - most younger men have a "thing" to want to see what it is like with an "older" woman and when they do, they find they like it quite well. No drama, no baggage, good lovin' and nice times together.