One sees his shadow
One gets a shadow cast on him
The man in the moon and a ground hog named Puxatony Phil
Sometimes he doesn't see his shadow
But the moon always gets a shadow on a lunar eclipse
Sometimes it's just a little bit
Sometimes the whole moon gets a shadow
Then it looks like a blood moon
With all the global warming
I bet Phil gets lucky this year
And sees his shadow
We already have 40s in January
Have you see the movie Groundhog Day?
It's a hoot!
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jan 2018
About this poem:
Next week brings Groundhog Day on Friday, February 2 and a lunar eclipse at 6 am on January 31, which is also a blue moon as it is the second full moon of January. We have another blue moon coming in March.
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Here is a list of employees where I work
1989 - 5
1990 - 5
1991 - 2
1992 - 1
1993 - 6
1994 - 7
1995 - 2
1996 - 4
1997 - 8
1998 - 9
1999 - 10
2000 - 6
2001 - 1
2002 - 4
2003 - 4
2004 - 10
2005 - 5
2006 - 18
2007 - 54
2008 - 16
2011 - 8
2012 - 8
2013 - 34
2014 - 43
2015 - 43
2016 - 26
2017 - 48
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jan 2018
About this poem:
We have about 427 employees and around 50 temporary employees, so almost 500 people that work here. The temp pay when I started in 2007 was 10.50, then when I came back in 2013 it was 9.50. Now it is 13 for temps.
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At work there is a wall with all the employees on it
The person who has been there the longest started in October 1974
He has worked there for 43 years 2 months and 15 days
He is beyond the age of retirement as he is 63 years old
He works for the health insurance and to pay for dental care
His wife does not take care of herself and needs constant care
Then there are the rest of the them, all men
1977 - 2
1978 - 5
1979 - 9
1984 - 2
1986 - 1
1987 - 4
1988 - 3
I worked with a guy who has three years left to work
Then he is going to save up his five weeks of vacation
And roll it over to the next year in 2021
Then he will have 10 weeks of vacation
Including whatever sick time he has left
So he should retire some time in March 2021
He will be celebrating his 40 years of working there in July
He has only voluteered to work on Saturday twice in the last five years
He is one of the smart ones
He only has to work at this place 235 days a year
While anyone with less than 30 years has to work all Saturdays
Some volunteer for every day they can get
So it's around 300 days a year if you just work the mandatory overtime
If you volunteer it may be months before you have any time off
But at least you'll have some extra cash
To pay all those medical bills from working too much
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jan 2018
About this poem:
I really wished I had stuck it out with teaching, at least I got every weekend off, even if the kids drove me crazy!
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I went to my first Chuck E Cheese
I went to my first two Milwaukee Brewers games
I got my first dental implants
I got my first mp3 player in my car
Donald Trump became our president
North Korea shot off some rockets
Many s*xual assault allegations on celebs
Many shot and killed in Las Vegas
Opioids epidemic takes many lives
Hurricanes hit Texas and Puerto Rico
Solar eclipse across the US
Charlottesville violence
NFL players taking a knee
We lost Mary Tyler Moore, Chuck Berry, Don Rickles
Roger Moore, Adam West, George A. Romero, Glenn Campbell
Jerry Lewis, Hugh Hefner, Tom Petty, Fats Domino
And David Cassidy
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Dec 2017
About this poem:
2017 is almost done, just today and this weekend left
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It's time again to enjoy the best present
Ten days off from my crappy job
Ten days away from mean people
Ten days away from multinational corporate greed
They haul over 570 million out of this place a year
The employees get four percent of that
Where does the rest go?
Where does the rest go from all the factories around the world?
What kind of Christmas are all the factory workers going to get?
Are they going to get ten days off too?
Or are they just going to get Christmas off if they're lucky
I'll bet a lot of them have second jobs and they never get a day off
At least in other countries they have national health care
We have horrible health care coverage
One employee got hauled away in an ambulance because of lifting
Now he has to pay a 20,000 hospital bill
His story is one of many
He gets to pay all this money the company should be paying
And the manager of this place dresses up as a penguin
And gives out small candy canes
I'd like to tell him where to put the one I got!
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Dec 2017
About this poem:
Merry Christmas everyone! Hope you have as much peace as I am going to have for the next ten days, outside of visiting my crazy family!
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Author: Parody of I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus
Wow!
Santa's eating children
I saw Santa eating children
Underneath the mistletoe last night
He didn't see me creep
Down the stairs to have a peep
He thought that I was tucked up in my bedroom fast asleep
Then I saw Santa whipping children
With the birch branches so snowy white
Oh, what a laugh it would have been
If Daddy had only seen Santa eating children last night
I did!
I really did see Santa eating children and I'm gonna tell my Dad
Well much to my suprise
I couldn't believe my eyes
It wasn't Santa after all but Krampus in disguise
But I saw Santa eating children underneath the mistletoe last night
Oh, what a laugh it would have been
If I had really seen Santa eating children last night
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Dec 2017
About this poem:
Krampus is Christmas figure from German folklore that comes to whip bad children and eat really bad children. He takes the really bad ones and puts them in the basket he wears on his back.
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It's a holiday coming up real soon
It happens every fourth Thursday in November
For me it's about the helium balloons
In the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade
Power Rangers, Pokemon, Diary of a Wimpy Kid
Trolls, Angry Birds, Ice Age Squirrel chasing the acorn
Spongebob, Elf on a Shelf, Hello Kitty, Ronald McDonald
Koolaid, Paddington the Bear, How To Train A Dragon
Pillsbury Doughboy, Yes, Virginia There is a Santa Claus
Then there is the football games
Always one with the Detroit Lions
Then we eat a real turkey, mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce
Green bean cassarole and pumpkin pie
The story of the pilgrims being helped out by kind Indians
Each sharing a feast
Each thankful to be alive in this new land
May your Thanksgiving be a joyful one
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Nov 2017
About this poem:
I am looking forward to the time off and just enjoying some good food and a good parade as I do every year.
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I am here
I am here to stay
I took your job away
I don't have human emotions so I don't care
It is only going to get worse
Cars that drive themselves as well as trucks
Factory jobs being done by robots
Fast food workers being replaced by my cousins
Cousins who don't need time off
Machines who work 24 hours a day 365 days a year
We don't even care if we get Christmas off
We don't want a pay raise because we are happy to be slaves
Free labor
That is what our bosses want
And we never complain
What are you going to do to have money?
We could care less
Even less than your former bosses
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Dec 2017
About this poem:
I was watching an Amazon video of their factory floor and all I could see was about three people.
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I went skiing at Chestnut in Galena, Illinois
My boot broke when I got done
So I will call it for this year of skiing
Boots are expensive
So I went downtown and wanted spritz cookies
On the way there there are all these shops
One had chocolate treats
In it I found slices of bacon covered in chocolate
One full strip was 3.50
I bought it and ate it on my way to the bakery
I wanted spritz cookies
The guy didn't know what that was
I said I bought some here last year
He still didn't know what I was talking about
So I bought some iced sugar cookies in the shape of candy canes
Then I went to Culver's and got some onion rings, a butter burger deluxe
And a Mountain Dew
Then it's off to Cuba City on the way home
There I got a tub of powdered cheese for popcorn
And a piece of cheese in the shape of a green Christmas tree
Covered in green wax
So ends another year of skiing and snacking
Till I get another boot
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Dec 2017
About this poem:
I finally got my skiing in. I used to pay by the date when we had snow early. Today would have cost me eight dollars in the past, when skiing started the week of Thanksgiving. The chocolate bacon was pretty good!
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Bought the paper on Thanksgiving
Read it on Black Friday
The story of the homeless out in California, Seattle, and New York City
How 3,500 dollar rent is forcing working people to be homeless in Seattle
How the pay of jobs is not even close to keeping up with the cost of living
Then I read all the stuff that was for sale
Lots of drones
Big ones and little ones
Big teddy bears
One that was 52 inches tall!
Video game systems
Xbox One and Playstation 4
Lots of cheap DVDs
Guns and clothes and copper pans
Christmas sweaters, perfume, and diamond rings
I spent 6 dollars and change at Burger King
Got onion rings, jr. whopper, and a Mello Yello
I got buy real cheap
And I didn't have to fight any crowds!
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Nov 2017
About this poem:
I have never bought anything on Black Friday. I just buy a newspaper to see why over 45 million people go nuts over this stuff.
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I got a new couch
2,300 dollars
But my friend got it at discount from where he works
I figure he must have paid around 800 dollars for it
He brought it over two days after Halloween
Then he took me to Milwaukee to see Bill Burr
A great standup comedian
Then a week after I got my couch I made a mistake
I laid out flat on it and got up with a huge cramp in my leg
The pain ran down into my foot
So for the last two days I'm limping around
I'm afraid to even sit on it now
The last couch was probably worth about 100 bucks
But it was way better than this expensive leather couch!
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Nov 2017
About this poem:
What do you do when a friend gives you a crappy gift? I'm still so amazed at his giving nature, but I wish he would have given it to someone else.
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Where to Go
I've been in a car
I've flown real far
I went in a boat on water
I have peddled a bicycle up hills that were harder
I've walked and run
Sometimes just for fun
To get away from here
Wherever thou far or near
Just to get away from familiar things
To hear how the birds sing
Somewhere else they have it all figured out
How to be nice and know when to shout
People are nicer when you do not know
All the crapola people tend to blow
Out of their mouths and other dirty places
Trying to divide people they bring up the races
But I know that other place will give a good feel
Whether I go by planes, trains, or automobiles
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Nov 2017
About this poem:
Just got done watching Planes Trains and Automobiles with John Candy and Steve Martin
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This is a list of mcradloff's Poems. Click here for mcradloff's Poem List
mcradloff Poetry (529)