SchylerSilvey Poetry (21)

This moshpit of memories, it gnaws at the soul,
the acid tears pour, again hurt by the cold.
Powerless to silence your memory that I now endure,
to forsake this ghost of brotherhood, to suffer nevermore.

This ghoulish prison, a prison of the mind,
it leaves me wanting, begging to know why.
Why show me no mercy? Why'd you choose to die?
Why haunt me with memories without a goodbye?

Why?

Like a moth into the light,
the world is ours to unite,
so purified, as we ignite,
and toss ourselves into his flame,
to free ourselves of nature's blame.
His hunger, habitual.

Like a whore of hearts lament,
our fate is ours to regret,
so mortified, as we forget,
and drown ourselves within the sea,
to wash ourselves at his decree.
His avarice, immortal.

I curse thy life, we leaveth thee behind.
Thee not worthy of the dragon's sight,
wash thy sins, or beget the blight.
As burning winds are blowing south,
we throw ourselves at the dragon's mouth.
The dragon cult ritual.

Many years, lost in thought,
imprisoned by the brain.
Lost my mind, all alone,
almost gone insane.

Through the clouds of dismay,
hope was very near.
The light shone through,
the cause to persevere.

Talking now, back and forth,
throughout the many days.
Lost myself to her voice,
no face to set my gaze.

It wasn't love, no not at all,
but potential it did have.
I set the course to see her now,
hope was all I had.

Two days, one night,
intimacy had prevailed.
Not her's, was only mine,
I won only what I failed.

Too much drink, too much smoke,
meant nothing in the end.
With potential lost, as I descend,
I left you a note.

Goodbye my light of hope.

Alienate the peace in me,
cut all ties, light the fuse.
Animate the me unseen,
evoke the lines, no way to lose.

Free me, hold me, come break me loose.
Shimmer me brightly, unveil the ruse.
Deny the root of my cold withered stare,
as you defile the hopes of this old jaded noose.

With tears that tear, you cradle me so.
The words of love, they won't let me go.
Trough many moments, and so many years,
how could I defy those glistening tears?

Mend the wounds in me,
put on a smile, don't let me stagger.
Deafen the voices I heed,
repeat the cycle, reuse the dagger.

Trapped inside of my head,
it's flooding with dread,
I'm drowning.
Swimming up for air,
I hear a voice so fair,
a cause to care?
I'm fighting.

Through fog and disrepair,
I rip and I tear,
I'm climbing.
Scaling up for the light,
her hand is in sight,
now looking down at the blight.
We're flying.

On that day of birth, after the death of your friend,
you stop it all, as you maketh your end.
Left in your wake, you leave six and one,
a bringer of sorrow, now hero to none,
a father and husband, a life rendered undone.

Too scared to face demons, so gilded by shame,
you ended it all for your selfish fate,
and left them behind as you rigged your escape.
Bearers of sorrow, that's your family now,
the wife and children, whom you had left out,
a father and husband, that's all they're without.

Rest in peace as you leave them to weep,
and to suffer the pain you've left them to reap.

Ignorance is innocence,
what is it I've become?
The pillar of my sanity,
I've yet to overcome.
They fall, as they crumble in my wake,
these pillars I have come to love,
I now can only rake.

Take away the pain from me,
what remains but the shell?
The hollowed essence of a man,
not sane enough to tell.
Sanity alone, not the only one that fell,
these pillars I have come to loathe,
have buried me as well.

A gentle leaf in solemn air,
flew from the tree without a care,
hitching a ride on nature's fare,
and through the breeze, she graced the sea,
to calm the tide and descend to me.
My baby girl, my legacy.

In pain I felt shame, in love I took blame,
the great flame of hearts, it twists in the night.
With hope I made lies, with tears I melt skies,
the perils of love, they blacken the light.

What is it now? Just tell me how.
The restless, the heartless, it's all too profound.
What is my place? Is this a race?
The lifeless, the careless, they're all I have found.

Through all the grime, I banish the past,
the pyre of time, it's burning to ash,
and in my twilight, I love me at last.

I wait in the night,
in silence, in fear.
Stoic, unwavering,
I must persevere.
For a glimmer of hope,
I leap, I pounce.
Certain, uncompromising,
I thus disappear.
Home is not here.

My dreams, so wretched,
they torture and tear.
My cries, so vivid,
only vultures show care.

The envy of hearts,
your's left unbroken.
The horrors of love,
forever unspoken.

I ran from answers,
for months, for years.
Erratic, unlucky,
I must dry these tears.
With the hope of change,
I stand, I fight.
Reborn, unceasing,
I thus reappear.
My home is here.

Within the pails of shattered dreams,
the lies of tongues, twisted and foul.
Beneath the tears of molten streams,
the jest of minds, riven with scowl.
Does it matter anymore?

Straight into my heart's descent,
far below a life's ascent.
What's left to adore?
Left alone to face despair,
to suffocate in abundant air.
What's not to abhor?

Through the years, I kissed your pain,
I faced your fears, I took the blame.
Your restless heart, no one can tame,
my freedom now begets your shame.
It doesn't matter anymore.

With eyes of the lost, from the distant past,
I beget dead stars, perfection at last.

I weave my words in through their mind,
I twist and bend what they have defined,
they'll never know why they are confined
and as I rip and tear at their shallow heart,
they're destroyed, right from the start.

They beg and cry and pray that I let them go,
but never do they ask why it is that I'm here,
for I am that which they most revere,
I am anguish, my name is fear.