couldhappen: Dating sites are a hoot!
- I am: 67 yr-old man seeking woman, 40-62
- Located in: Fargo, North Dakota, USA
- Last online: Dec 2014
- Height: 5' 8" (173 cm)
- Body Type: Toned & Firm
- Hair Color: Bald/Shaved
- Eye Color: Hazel
- Ethnicity: White/Caucasian
- Education: Some College
- Religion: Christian/Protestant
- Occupation: Sales/Marketing
- Income: ---
- Smokes: Never
- Drinks: Socially
- Marital Status: Divorced
- Has kids: Yes, they don't live with me
- Wants kids: No Way
- Sign: Libra
More About Me
I’m a jerk. I won’t open doors for you. In fact, I may trip you as you go through the door, just for laughs.
I expect you to cook for me and clean up my mess. I have a menu.
I leave my socks and other nasty items on the floor in the bedroom, and yes, they stink. I leave the seat up.
I don’t do laundry. You must LOVE to do my laundry -- almost as much as you love wrapping yourself around my gorgeous body. I think you get the picture.
I don’t do romance. I expect sex on the first date. HOT SWEATY action. I won’t sleep over (we will go to your place because I don’t want you to know where I live). I've had experience with stalkers. It's not easy being irresistible.
Dating sites say I should talk about the following four points, so I will address them one by one:
1. ‘Talk about your hobbies’ – kicking puppies and geriatric cats
2. ‘Talk about your goals/aspirations’ – finding a rich woman or two to take care of me (this should be #1)
3. ‘Talk about yourself and what makes you unique’ – I’m not unique. But I am exceptional.
4. ‘Your taste in music’ – The Cranberries, Enya, Toni Basil, Indigo Girls, Weird Al Yankovic, raunchy 12 Days of Christmas parodies
Um, if you are reading this, you should have figured out that I'm poking fun at this entire profile writing exercise.
If you didn't get it, read the previous sentence.
More About my Match
OK gals, hurry, I'm waiting....…start typing now.
Of course I'm just poking fun at this profile writing exercise. I'm a bit of a smartass.
I have a job.
To Report Abuse: If this profile or the behavior of the member is inappropriate, click here to Report Abuse »