Omg iv logged in here after almost 3 months..
jeez i missed this place.. :(
Whoaa how is everyone here..??? go on tell me hows life been with u.. any major changes..good..bad..ugly ???
Coming back to where i disappeared..?? well i decided to explore my baking and confectionery hobby/taking orders from home into a new direction.. and so i was working in a 5 star hotels baking n confec. dept.
How was the experience.. Tiring !!! i now know that i can work for 12 hours..STANDING all the time..
(get to sit only during breaks..) then travel for 2 hours (crowded bus
- crowded train
- cab) to reach home.
sleep for 4 - 5 hours.. get dressed.. again 2 hours of travelling and....
...STILL BE ALIVE AND GEAR UP FOR another 12 hours of running around.. getting burnt in the oven room.. making all sorts of cookies, breads, tarts, chocolates, etc etc.. yum yum..
so many goodies.. but the weird part of id hardly eat things there.. mainly because i saw it all the time around me n wudnt feel like eating. too much of anythin aint nice as they say..
i realized guys wud share recipes ever so easily but wen it came to girls..omg theyd get all sorts of work done n yet not let u know certain things are made.. i did have my way out tho..
the trick is to never ask for recipes but simply observe them while theyr working. where as the guys at times wud tell me how things are made without even being asked for it.
but all in all i loved the experience n i wudnt want to continue at the same place... the reason is they pay really low for the amount of effort one puts in... id probably want to work on a ship or i can work half as much n earn twice as much working from home.. and who knows.. probably have my own bakery someday
I like this feeling i get everytime i try a new recipe and awaiting its outcome..
The butterflies in my tummy.. the heart full of hopes about the recipe turning out perfect.. the mind filled with thoughts of.. " it will turn out well" "it will turn out well"
Its eggless chocolate muffins..i aint too much of an eggless baker.. i prefer n mainly specialize in, with egg bakery goods.. but someone came home asking if i can bake eggless choco muffins some for them.. so thot ok why not..
Keeps fingers crossed.. theyr in the oven right now..
Whats with so many fake profiles here..??
(iv read n been often told about scammers but atleast those cant be hidden too long...)
Came across 2 ppl who start talkin to me.. we exchange regular mails n then they say those pics aint theirs.. i mean wtf? get a life ppl... i do appreciate that they tOld me it wasnt them.. cud have been worse after all..
but it cant get outa my mind n heart n thus id not be able to be myself anymore.. wud always be wondering what more are they hiding.. or can hide.. ??
One advice to everyone on this site... dont trust anyone here (specially if ur talking more) without seeing them on cam.. cause having a profile pic means nothing. for all u know its been taken off a lingerie website..
Gaty just called me.. surprise surprise.. well i dint expect him to call as he is married now.. so moving on i talk like we always do... u know with some people u dont have to think wat to talk about... u get on so well that the conversation just flowsss.. like this river which is long n full of freshness n zest.. but then each river has to enter the sea n its not going to remain as fresh for too long... i cud sense somethin is wrong..n suddenly he says... Zahh my wife has problems with u... i reply... erm... wat for? we havnt talked for so long.. but apparently she doesnt believe him... n thinks we are secretly talking...
To be honest.. i liked it all.. ok ok i feel like such a big sadist right now.. but there are few things that happened in the past n i always felt there was no justice done to me.. anyway i hope they can resolve the whole thing.. im happy for once i aint down to tears thinking of him n that i cudnt grow old with him... hmm... i need a hug... : /
Im soooooooooooo tired and sleepy right now.. came home a little while back after writing the exam.. was up almost all of last nyt studying.. yawns.. having some me tym now.. hmm..cant wait for saturday evening..proly go out n party after the last exam...my phone stopped working last evening.. wonder whats got into it.. hope ppl wont think im dead.. lol.
I have not had chocolates for about a month now..
the only time i ate them was when i was baking something chocolaty for orders..
Ppl who know me can understand how difficult it is for me to give up chocs.. im this crazy chocolate addict.. but it was leading to weight gain.. so thot ok il give up chocs for a while.. until my last exam.. which is on the 7th of may.. had some real testing times when id be craving for chocolate but id just have water or something sweet and try to supress the craving.. but now as the date is nearing.. its getting more n more difficult..im so badly craving for some dark chocolate right now.. ahhhhhhhhh hurry up 7th of may...
Coincidently last few weeks i got loads of chocs.. had ppl coming from abroad, or someone gifting me chocs, or someone making them for me.. iv been collecting all of them..
Has any1 ever given up some kinda food stuff..for how long n how did u cope with the cravings?
"Outwardly, I was everything that a well brought girl should be. Inside i was screaming"
Love this dialogue from the movie Titanic.
All of a sudden iv been accepting all the bad realities of life.. before id fight back,argue,ask questions... not anymore..
i keep dumping everything in my heart..
if it gets too bad i just cry myself to sleep.. hmmm...
Yeah i accept i do love u... even tho i dont believe in love.. :( il probably never tell you because i know vr far far away and in spite of being best of mates and sharing everything with u.. il put this big stone on my heart n keep pretending that vr only mates... sigh... i hate to be so vulnerable as i am ryt now but i cant help feeling this sadness... sadness of never being able to meet u :(
I dont feel like studying... :( been trying since the last few hours but all in vain... wondering what will help..
Hmm so today i had my lil cousin over n he was alone in my parents room.. i went to see what he is upto and the door was locked.. so i knocked and he opened after a few mins..asked him why has he locked the door n what is he upto? n he says..nothing, just playin games.. i look at the pc n theres no games but google..
I decide to check history n saw that he was searching for sexy girls on youtube.. im all shocked but keep quiet.. he sees that im checking.. n tell me: erm i was looking at sexy girls..
how wud u react to such a situation? he is 9 or 10 years old n in 4th grade. i told him: u shudnt be checking such things n play games instead.. he kept quiet n went on with playin games..
hmm im kinda amazed caused when i was 9 i dont think i even thot of hot men or anything s*xual.. wonder whats coming next?
Butt3rfly87 Blog (15)