betcha didnt see this coming
just when you think life is good...
your sun is shining....
the sweet sounds of love
laughter
and joy
are echoing through your soul.
someone comes along
and pushes your face into the dirt
reminding you that you'll never be... just a little more...
bringing back those ugly memories....
memories i thought were so far away...
tighter it squeezes
i find so hard to breathe
so hard to understand
all why's all the how's
and all the but's
i could find happiness....but
i could feel love....but
i could start over....but
i could forget the pain...
BUT.
just beyond....
sitting here in dark
on an empty shore
beautiful stars that seem dance together
the man in moon whispering my name
and the soft wind blowing kisses on my cheeks......
so peacefull, so serene that i never want to see the sun rise again.
the waves singing their sweet song...and the sand so cold on my feet..
to share this moment with you
i woud give anything
just beyond these tears i see your face....
smiling down at me....
just beyond these broken wings
i can feel your embrace...
just beyond this pain
i can hear you say its going to be alright...
but as the tide comes you fade away...
only a memory
only a fantasy
just beyond the horizon
i can see the sun rising
just beyong this lonliness
i can see my heart
breaking
whispers
there's a whisper in the dark....
calling my name
there's voice in my head....
begging me for more...
there's pair eyes...
staring at me...
there's a set of lips
quivering in fear....
there's a set of arms
that i want to hold me tight...
there's a warm heart....
that i wish i could love...
he's such a beautiful creature
lying so peacefully
he's such a mysterious wonder
something i know i'll never have...
through the dark he could take me away
away from the noise and away from the pain...
through the haze
i hope he finds me
through the noise
i hope he hears me
though my tears
i hope he will love me
10:53 AM - 0 Comment
there’s a storm coming
theres a storm brewing somewhere
theres only danger ahead
its dark now
only stars dance in the sky....
falling down one by one.....
theres a rage stirring im soul...
building up into a monster...
fighting to get out...
tearing me apart
from the inside out
theres a feeling in my heart...
that i cant seem to shake
so warming so soothing
beautiful and soft...
i want to run but theres no where to hide
dont know if i can handle to pain
dont know if i can live without the pleasure
10:56 AM - 0 Comments
just when ya think
i thought this time was it would be different
something good
something pure....
i thought i really could believe that was the one....
something everlasting
something real...
just when you think things couldn't be better...
just when you think you couldn't be happier....
reality slapped me in the face....
bruising my soul
breaking my heart
i thought he would love me...
i thought he would protect me...
i thought my seach had finally come to its end...
i was wrong....
did you ever think that one day you'll
wake up this will be all over....
out my window watching
everything melt down...
slowly my breaking heart...
so exhausted of this life...
solitude and sorrow...
i never thought i could believe...
that you were the one...
with you lies and deceit....
i wanna take it back...
i wanna wash it away...
sometimes i wonder....
if love is worth the pain
sometimes i wonder....
if i'll ever be strong enough....
to do it all over again.
never wanted
i never wanted perfection
i never expected it...
i never wanted anything...
more that just you....
i never wanted you to change....
i never asked you to....
i never wanted anthing
but for you to be who you are...
i never wanted these feelings
i never asked for this pain
i never wanted this lonliness
i never asked to cry myself to sleep
i'll never ask
i'll never tell
i'll never want
again.
here i stand alone....
watching waves hit the shore...
the beautiful colors
as the sun goes on down on me...
orange to red to purple
then fading to balck...
life is just alittle colder now...
a little too much...
i just wanted to be the one...
that picked you up and held you close
when this world just wont let up...
i could have been the one
i should have been the one...
but as this life goes on so do you...
living in your lies and almost believing in them too..
and as this life goes on so do i...
i just wanted to help and now
at least i can say tried....
but somewhere in the back of mind...
a little voice is screaming....
somewhere in dark
im searching.....
here i stand alone..
watching the waves hit shore
such beautiful colors....
as sun rises to warm my face...
something is headed my way.
in the dead silence
i hear the rustle of the trees
the earth shaking under my feet.....
my hands begin to shake...
my knees are getting weak
i want to scream
but nothing comes out
i want to hide
but there's no where to go...
scared of these feelings
it burns me
scaring my soul
and breaking my heart....
this monster overwhelmes me...
wrapping me in nothingness...
and leaving me hollow....
something is coming....
creeping up slowly...
vicariously watching...
off in the distance i see the shadow
run fast....
faster
something is coming....
and all he wants is me.
but i do remember
i cant remember my first step
i cant remember my first word...
but i do remember the first time i looked into those eyes...
standing there
the rain falling all around us....
i cant remember my first crush
and i cant remember my first date
but i can remember the first time you held me in your arms...
so warm and strong... i never wanted to let them go..
such beautiful moments just locked in time
and filed away in my mind as memories of the past...
i cant remember the moment it all changed
and i cant remember the first mistake i made...
but i do remember the first time i saw those eyes cry....
such dark clouds brewing within them....
i cant remember when you stopped loving me
and i cant remember when i stopped caring...
but i do remember the moment you walked out that door
i remember the pain as fell to my knees
i remember the emptiness that filled my soul....
i cant remember why we were fighting
i cant remember why we cant take back the words...
but i do remember those eyes lost in mine...
i do remember that....
I LOVE YOU.
leana26 Blog (10)