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someone special to me...

I met someone on here the very first day I was on this site which was about 7weeks ago,he was the first person that I saw and emailed and I just knew he would not email me or if he did it would be to say that he was taken.....but he responded and said that he was definitely interested in me and he was close and we just seemed to click and i believed him and the things that he told me,I started to devlope feelings for this man and he was reciprocating even though we have still not met,even though plans have been made so many times now to meet and when it gets close to the time to meet he stops talking to me,he has gone as far as to block me from emailing him on CS but not on messenger.But then he will send me a flower and tell me he was sorry that it was cause he was afraid that I wouldn't like him,he wouldn't be what I was looking for,and then the next time plans are made and same thing happens,4 times plans were made and I told him the third time that I never go past the 2nd time but I went 4 chances with him and he did it again today. I tell him I am done but I just can't get him off my mind,the wondering,not sure wether it is emotions for him or just cause I can't have him that makes me want him so bad. I do not believe that that is the case,but I would truly love to just meet him so that I would know and be able to walk away and get on with my lofe. I also wonder agreat deal if this is his sick way of enjoying himself and I can't wrap my head around that,that someone could actually enjoy hurting someone.A someone that may have so much inside of her that was waiting just for him to have.I just want to be able to turn loose of this crap.Dean you know that I am talking about you.If only you really wanted what you have said that you want.If only you could see that all I was tryin to do was to love you.moping crying sigh dunno :
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