The Most Important Positive Relationship (2)
Now you can see what values you want to have in this relationship, and the benefits of this type of relationship. At this point, you need to realize these are the exact things you need to have in order within yourself.
You must absolutely treat yourself, the way you wish for others to treat you!
Think of it this way. If someone truly loved and respected themselves, would they ever enter into a relationship with someone who would attempt to walk all over them? Not a chance!
Alternatively, would someone who is manipulative and controlling attempt to enter into a relationship with someone who was strong, loving, and independent? Or would they be more attracted to someone who was insecure?
When you treat yourself with love and respect, you will expect others to treat you this way, and behave accordingly. People will have to adjust the way they treat you, based on how you treat yourself.
You need to be honest with yourself about where you are now. It may not be where you want to be, but that’s alright. Realize that you have done the best you could with the knowledge you have had up until this point. Don't waste time beating yourself up. Instead get to work developing the most important relationship. The relationship with yourself!
You must absolutely treat yourself, the way you wish for others to treat you!
Think of it this way. If someone truly loved and respected themselves, would they ever enter into a relationship with someone who would attempt to walk all over them? Not a chance!
Alternatively, would someone who is manipulative and controlling attempt to enter into a relationship with someone who was strong, loving, and independent? Or would they be more attracted to someone who was insecure?
When you treat yourself with love and respect, you will expect others to treat you this way, and behave accordingly. People will have to adjust the way they treat you, based on how you treat yourself.
You need to be honest with yourself about where you are now. It may not be where you want to be, but that’s alright. Realize that you have done the best you could with the knowledge you have had up until this point. Don't waste time beating yourself up. Instead get to work developing the most important relationship. The relationship with yourself!
------ This thread is Archived ------
This Thread is Archived
This Thread is archived, so you will no longer be able to post to it. Threads get archived automatically when they are older than 3 months.
« Go back to All Threads
« Go back to All Threads
More Threads
other can see but not you
Common Issues with the BMW X1
Happy Birthday MysteriousGirl80
your personality
the way you look
wanting beyond need
Sleepy Don!
Feel Good Music
men's perspective towards women
The Best of the GOP
More Threads
Report threads that break rules, are offensive, or contain fighting. Staff may not be aware of the forum abuse, and cannot do anything about it unless you tell us about it. click to report forum abuse »
If one of the comments is offensive, please report the comment instead (there is a link in each comment to report it).
If one of the comments is offensive, please report the comment instead (there is a link in each comment to report it).
Stats for this Thread
248 Views
1 Comments
Created: Jul 2009
Last Viewed: Apr 18
Last Commented: Jul 2009
0 Likes
A relationship could be defined as a bond or connection between people.
Relationships can take many forms, such as family, business, friendships, or perhaps a romantic partner. However, the most important positive relationship is the one you have with yourself.
Many times people say they want to find someone who will treat them with love and respect. Certainly it is fine to wish to be treated this way. Be that as it may, the qualities you wish find in a relationship with others, must first be the qualities you have in your relationship with yourself.
You simply can’t put the responsibility of feeling good about yourself onto someone else. If you are not treating yourself with love and respect, how can you expect to attract someone who will treat you that way?
Increasingly, people tend to look to their relationships to find purpose or meaning for their lives. Yet your purpose, and the purpose of others, is personal thoughts and ideas based on each person’s beliefs about what is needed for fulfillment. Therefore, you must look inside at your own beliefs, values, and goals to determine if you are living on purpose, or with meaning.
The reason you can’t look to others to fulfill your sense of purpose or meaning in life, is that they have to fulfill their own purpose. If they give that up to try to provide your life with purpose, they will be sacrificing themselves. Sacrifice eventually leads to resentment, when someone realizes their own personal needs are not being met.
Giving the best of you to others is a great path to fulfillment. This is called service, as opposed to sacrifice. It is the difference between giving of yourself, and giving up on yourself.
The act of service itself should require that you take care of yourself first. Until you are able to treat yourself with love and respect, you can not give love and respect to others. It simply is not in you to give at that point.
For example, one year ago today I wrote my first affirmation called Believe!
I was in the early stages of some serious personal development. I was beginning to see that perception is reality. I had looked at my life, and saw what it was, and what I wanted it to be. I wrote that affirmation as a tool to remind me what I believed in, and what was important to me.
Although I was able to write that affirmation, I also needed to read it many times each day to keep myself on course. One year ago, I did not yet have the resources developed inside of me, so that I could do what I am doing today by writing this article to help others.
It has been a personal growth process to get to this point, and by no means is it finished. Nor will it ever be. However, at this stage of the process, I now treat myself with love and respect, and I have developed some clarity about who I am.
It is the process of developing that positive relationship with yourself, which allows you to align your beliefs, values and goals. It is then that you can identify your strengths and talents that allow you to truly be of service to others.
So how do you have such a positive relationship with yourself, that you can in turn have this type of relationship with others?
What I am going to suggest is that you think hard about exactly what a great relationship with someone else would look like. Write out a list of values you would like to see from someone else.
Would the other person treat you with love, and respect?
Would they be honest and loyal?
Would they give you the freedom and support to achieve your goals and dreams?
Once you have your list, envision what it would be like to be with this person. How would this relationship make you feel? What would this type of relationship do for your life?