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An airline captain was helping a new blonde flight attendant prepare for her first overnight trip.
Upon their arrival, the captain showed the flight attendant the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight. The next morning, as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day’s route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He called her at the hotel to ask what happened to her.
She was crying when she answered the phone. “I can’t get out of the room!”
“Why not?” the captain asked.
“There are only three doors,” she sobbed. “One is the bathroom, one is the closet and one has a sign on it that says ‘Do Not Disturb’!”.
A blonde holding a baby walks into a drug store and asks the clerk if she can use the store’s baby scale.
“Sorry, ma’am,” says the clerk. “Our baby scale is broken. But we can figure the baby’s weight if we weigh mother and baby together on the adult scale, and then weigh the mother alone, and subtract the second number from the first.”
“Oh, that won’t work,” says the blonde.
“Why not?” asks the clerk.
“Because,” she answers, “I’m not the mother - I’m the aunt.”.
Bill bought his beautiful blonde wife, Sherry, a cell phone for their first wedding anniversary.
Sherry loved the gift, and watched intently as Bill explained all the features on the phone.
The next day, as Sherry is having her hair done, her phone rings. It’s Bill. “Hi hon,” he says. “How do you like your new phone?”
“I just love it. It’s so small and your voice is clear as a bell, but there’s one thing I don’t understand. How did you know I was at the beauty parlor ?”.