A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a long flight.
The lawyer asks if the Newfie would like to play a fun game. The Newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks.
The lawyer persists, that the game is a lot of fun. "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me only $5; you ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500." This catches the Newf's attention and to keep the lawyer quiet, agrees to play the game.
The lawyer asks the first question. "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?"
The Newf doesn't say a word, reaches in his pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the lawyer.
Now, it's the Newfie's turn. He asks the lawyer, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four?"
The lawyer uses his laptop, searches all references. He uses the Airphone; he searches the Net and even the Library of Congress. He sends e-mails to all the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the Newfie and hands him $500.
The Newf pockets the $500 goes right back to sleep.
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He wakes the Newfie up and asks, "Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four?"
The Newf reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5 and goes back to sleep.
I work in a welding shop..not a welder but run machines and I am ready to be trained for two new jobs...It is all brand new to me but I love to learn new things...once I learn these new jobs I will learn how to weld...I was a forestry worker back home...power saw operator and skidder driver....My son who is twenty- two flew out here with me...he works at the same place and is a welder on night shift...My youngest sister moved out here the first of June.She found a great job.. I just moved her into a place of her own last night....The Bay Of Fundy is a must see place...it is absolutely beautiful and the best sea food you can eat.
Thanks ...I lived on the Bay Of Fundy in a small place called Upper Economy...I loved the beach...the tide raised fifty feet in six hours...and six hours later you can walk on the ocean floor...I miss the water...but like most people here from the east, I came for work...and less taxes...
The Crocheted Doll >> >> A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years. >> >>They had shared everything >> >> >>They had talked about everything. >> >> >>They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old >>woman >>had a shoe box in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her >>husband never to open or ask her about. >> >>For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but >>one day the little old woman got very sick and the doctor said she >>would >>not recover. >> >>In trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took down >>the shoe >>box and took it to his wife's bedside. >> >>She agreed that it was time that he should know what was in the >>box. >> >> >>When he opened it, he found two crocheted dolls and a stack of >>money totaling $95,000. >> >>He asked her about the contents. >> >>"When we were to be married," she said, "my grandmother told me >>the >>secret of a happy marriage was to never argue. She told me that if >>I ever >>got angry with you, I should just keep quiet and crochet a doll." >> >>The little old man was so moved; he had to fight back tears. >>Only two precious dolls were in the box. She had only been angry >>with him >>two times in all those years of living and loving. He almost burst >>with >>happiness. "But what about all of this money? Where did it come >>from?" >> >>Oh," she said, "that's the money I made from selling the dolls." >> >> ---For all men with a good sense of humor >> >>Women will love this. >> >> A Prayer...... . >> >> Dear Lord, >> I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; >> Love to forgive him; >> And Patience for his moods; >> Because Lord, if I pray for Strength, >> I'll beat him to death. >> And I don't know how to crochet. >> >> Amen!
not sell..nothing to sell....looking to rent right now..moved out here from Nova Scotia last October...just starting to get back on my feet after a few rough years...I never give up and never will...I take life one day at a time....There is good and bad in everything...
not much I am just flicking in and out...I am looking for a new place to live starting next month. It is a battle here...but something will come along...
honestyplease Forum Posts (699)
RE: Any good jokes????
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a long flight.
The lawyer asks if the Newfie would like to play a fun game. The Newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks.
The lawyer persists, that the game is a lot of fun. "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me only $5; you ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500."
This catches the Newf's attention and to keep the lawyer quiet, agrees to play the game.
The lawyer asks the first question. "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?"
The Newf doesn't say a word, reaches in his pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the lawyer.
Now, it's the Newfie's turn. He asks the lawyer, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four?"
The lawyer uses his laptop, searches all references. He uses the Airphone; he searches the Net and even the Library of Congress. He sends e-mails to all the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the Newfie and hands him $500.
The Newf pockets the $500 goes right back to sleep.
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He wakes the Newfie up and asks, "Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four?"
The Newf reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5 and goes back to sleep.