I agree with Roy.. There is alot of love here... but there are different types of love.. And all of them can be experienced here. If its meant to be then you will find it here.. if not then you will find it someplace else..
Justintime, the one thing that I find in a lot of people is that they want to be open and honest with each other.. but sometimes its way to fast.. its all great and wonderful at first.. and it's "I love you" and "I love you more"..but when it gets down to it, its probably only been a week or two.. People tend to, out of desperation want to be with someone so badly that they think that if I don't hurry up and tell this person that "I love you" right here right now, they are going to loose them... but then once they truely find out about that person, they find they aren't what they thought they were in the first place.. SO ultimately they end up doing just as you speak of.
Please dont take me wrong Im not saying that you are the one that is doing this.. I dont know I can't answer that, only you can..and I dont think we should give up on these people.. but then I am more open and honest with people about taking things slow.. DON'T rush things.. I have said this before in a thread.. People want to move so fast these days.. and I think part of that is due to life itself.. look around you... everyone is in a hurry. We don't take time like they use to 50 yrs ago. We live in a "hurry up and wait" society. I have learned my lesson years ago.. I will NOT and I do Repeat!! NOT tell someone that I love them until I truely have known them for a very long time.. NOW who knows what length of time that is.. but I will tell you.. it won't happen in the first part of a relationship.. It takes somewhere between 1-3 years to truely get to know someone.. truely experience the whole person.. I'm taking my life slower.. I'm in no hurry to get to the other side.. till I have seen it and experienced it.. THEN I will take the step.
I have to agree with you Rob. And I know there are others that said you have you do what feels right. But what I cant seem to understand is how can someone after only meeting me (or anyone else)once or twice say they want a committed relationship, or they are falling in love. Tjeu dont even know me... HE## I have a temper.. Hey it goes with the red head thing.. I will be very honest.. if I hear those words I want to run like .. well anyway... lets just say that I dont want to be in that kind of situation. Yes I want to hear someone say they love me but I want it to be something that has grown over time and has a solid foundation. Because if we dont have that foundation it will not last. Been there done that.. not playing again!
Ok.. enough of my ranting..I guess I have to pay you guys the 2 cents this time!! ..lol
Thanks everyone for the input. Its nice to see others perspective on things.
Rob, good analogy. I never thought about it as being compulsive or even agressive, or at least the way that you put it, going after what they want, then dealing with it later. I guess that goes with our throw away society.
arabella I understand what your saying but just filling a void because its there is not a good thing to do. I think thats why we have so many divorces. We dont really take a good look at what we are using to fill those voids and find out that it wasnt what we really needed. Did we really look at "our" void before trying to fill it with someone?
I dont think there is such a thing as "love at first sight" or that you could fall in love with someone just with in a few days/weeks/months. Yes you can have feelings for that person but until you experince the person in whole and over a time, how do you truely know them? Not to say that there arent people who have done the very same thing and its worked out, but there arent that many.
I know what you all are going thru. I myself am wanting to take things slow. To get to know the other person. You cant do that in a fast pace enviroment. I don't even know that I will ever marry anyone or even move in with them. Doesnt mean that I dont want to have a long term relationship, just that I want to truely know someone before I make that big step. I guess thats why I have such a hard time with people in such a hurry. You really can NOT get to know someone that quickly. It takes time and experience to get to know them. Just my two cents!
Ok.. I dont know that I have posted this in the correct place, so if I didnt please forgive me.
I know the men and women both do this so I am not targeting one or the other on this. BUT since my experience is with men..lol.. Why is it that people who are dating want to be in such a hurry to become a "Couple" or in a serious relationship. Yes I am also looking for a long term or soulmate myself, but Im not in any hurry to do so. Because I want to truely know the person I am with. I have dated several men lately and all seem to be in a hurry to "pin down the relationship" I'm not in a hurry and the more I say this the more I get "but your looking for long term.. why are you playing with me" I'm NOT.. I just want to get to know them before I make any kind of decision. And Im not talking about a long time thing either.. I have had this happen after just a few weeks or even a few days of dating and getting to know these guys. SO can someone tell me why people do this?? Im seriously thinking about leaving the dating scene all together. Hopefuly you guys will have some good comments on this one!
MystryRed Forum Posts (13)
RE: Hello from The Wrestling Reverend
Hehehe.. Have just the place for you.. wont hurt your back at all when I lay ya flat!