I Miss the Feeling By. Jared Ellis
As she left I realized,
I missed the feeling…………..
I missed the feeling,
Of her fingers running through my hair,
Of Her tiny hands gently resting in the palm of my hand,
Her cool kisses on my neck
I miss the feel of a warm hug
At the end of a long day,
I miss the feel of her eyes slowly watching me,
Waiting for me,
Longing for me,
To come and hold her once again,
I miss the feeling of
Her warm body laying
Next to mine on a cold winters morning,
The feeling of knowing she's safe,
Warm,
Satisfied,
Mine.
I Miss the feeling of Her
Just being with me and knowing
That she's not going anywhere.
I miss the feeling of warmth,
Purity,
Wholeness,
Commitment,
And Love,
I miss the Feeling of Love
In my heart,
In my mind,
And in my soul,
I miss all those lovely feeling
I miss them every day,
For the feeling that are brought
On by a lover can never fade,
Never be broken,
Or tainted,
Now I know those feeling I once felt are gone,
But I know I will someday
Feel those feelings again,
With some else…………..
This is a Poem that i Wrote a lil while ago expressing some extermly personal feeling i held a long time ago about some one. I hope you enjoyed it
je
I think Kenny Chesney had it right in the song "i Go Back" because its true weather its a song, movie, picture, even a smell. They all can trigger a memory, depending on the memory that might or might not be a good thing. For me my life has been like a really really interesting, and at some times bruttel best seller lol i always say i need to write a book and tell my life story thus far, I wonder if people would read it? But I bet if they did they would be supprised about alot of things.
Who I am today its the result of to many moments and experiances to remember, some good some bad. And with those moments, they all started with a choice, and i can honestly say I have no regrets for any thing I have done, weather it was those really late nights in High school at a buddies house to doing thing i really i really shouldn't have dun but did any ways,lol to saying what needed to be said despite not knowing what the out come would be, or saying something anyways and being well aware of what was going to happen or what was going to be said.
A life with regrets isn't a life that I want to live, We all do and say things we shouldn't, we all have those moments where we think to our selves "what were you thinking" or "Seriously" lol.
I guess with every thing I have ever done or said, it has lead me in the directing to where I am know. And I couldn't be happier. ..
You can ask any one I have a nak or a gift of already knowing thing that people are thinking, or how they are feeling, or just plain don't want any one else to know. And i guess a some of the time it gets me into trouble and some times People are releived because they dont have to say anything. Some times for me its a pain in my @$$ because with out every saying the words or asking the question, I already know the answer. But ya know some times i say or ask any ways despite already know what will happen. Most of the time I'm right. But do I do that just to do or do i Do it because even if i am 99.99999999999% sure that i know what the answer is already there is that .0000000000001% chance i might be wrong. Why not? and thats my i have no regrets because you never know what might happen. And some of the time don't do what I do or say what I say for or because of the people invalved. I do it for myself. And some times you need to be a lil selfish.
So i guess thats me being me, Live life one moment at a time because you never know what will happen next, I could die tomorrow or live to be 100. Ya never know.
Thats Why I always or try to live my Life to this saying
LIVE, LAUGH, LOVE, 4EVER!!!!
"When I look upon your face
And see your smile
With your eyes bunched up
It drives me wild.
With your loving arms you touch my soul
With every touch you make whole,
For you my Love I hold so dear, and
When you're away I shed a tear.
I know in my heart you belong to me
With every breath I pledge to thee
So here I am, on my knees,
Asking you to be with me
I'll love you more than life itself
Honey, I love you and no one else
Take my hand I'll lead the way
I promise to take care, of you each day
From this moment here and till the end of time
I pledge to you, my heart my mind.
So I'll take you in my arms
And hold you tight
I'll fight for you with all my might
So come with me on this road of life
Not knowing what will happen will be such a sight
With every hug and every kiss
We'll live together in heavenly bliss."
By:je
I titled titled this Blog the Fear of Coming Into Your Own, for many reasons. I guess the one that I write all my blogs about, my feelings, despite how random, out of place, blunt, or flat out weird they are. I always seem to be able to write them out on paper. lately I have made some pretty big choices in my life, I guess the first one is leaveing a place where I have gotten confortable, used to, and some what made it my home. I am leaveing Abilene, Tx for good, and I'm never coming back. So i leaveing and going home for a lil while to finish school, work some things out, and save some money. Its kind of funny I am not he kind of person that sets a plan of action out, any one who knows me knows I shoot from the hip. I'm random thats who I am and always have been. Now I find myself planning and moving on. I guess thats what life is all about coming into your own descovering who you are and what you are going to do in life. And for every one its different they all generally lead in the same direction just different paths. to things such as a wife, a family, a house, a career and so many other things. How we get to those things and in what amount of time............is well different for every one. Some choose some things first, some wait. But it all leads to one thing ......................and that is Makeing a life for your self that is pleasing to you, your family and friends and most of all to God.
We all have that fear inside of us, its what drives us to do things in life, to take that chance, to take that leap. Some times not knowing where it might lead. its the Fear that drives us a people to do things that we would never do, just hopeing or praying that something bigger and better is just around the bend.
I can so that fear isn't one of those things i like to talk about, for the longest time i felt if I showed fear, it meant i was weak it would leave me vernorible and even to this day i am still subborn and hard headed as i have have been( i get it from my parents lol) but i do know its that dear that drove me to do any thing i have ever done.
And i guess the fear that drives us is the same fear that is with me when I am planning on going home, leaveing this place, starting a planing to truelly being the rest of my life.
And i could Feel more Exited
So i get home from work hang out, call some people, take care of a little house keeping that needs to be done and I decide to put in a movie, sense i have watched every thing i owe at least 3 time I decide to go rent something. I Chose 21 if you havnt seen it then I would stop reading and go watching it and come back and finish this blog later( i hate to be a buz kill). In this movie a young man about my age, vary smart, has the world at his door step. Any ways in the movie the the two things he doesnt have is the money and the second is well "The Battle of The Ages" .............The Girl. any ways so in the movie he takes his God given gift of numbers and uses it to make a crap load of cash, then one night he gets cocky, and looses it all, not only does he loose it all he gets taken down a peg or two by an old school Vegas Mod Boss. At the end of the movie after an masterful plan to set up the man that screwed him the first time he lost it all and why he got the crap beat out of him. He ends up looseing it all again. But ends up with the Girl.
I guess in this movie for me it was more that a good movie about Vegas, gambiling, beautiful females, and a lil action. No well it was those things but for me it was what something that I and we all go through every day of our lives its all about chance.
Wether i go this way to work and chance the traffic , or to i chance calling that one person and letting them know what is really going on or something simple as what am I going to have for lunch. There is a saying in another movie that goes "life isn't about the number of breathes you take, its about the moments that take your breath away" and that is one of the truest things ever said.
Every thing that I have been through, said, acted on, or been apart of has in some way changed me forever. weather its what I do of who I meet. It has changed me. and a lot of those time i have had my breath taken away. not all of them where in a good way but still.
Life is a Game of chance, we only get one time around, there are no true second chances. And i say true second chance bc well i have had a lot of close calls in my life. but there isn't enough paper in the world to share all of those stories, well maybe some day but not know.lol
So I what is see when i look at my life when i look at me as a man?
I see a man that has been through so much, with some many different people, that has more scars inside and out that he doesn't even know where to start counting, a man who has stopped looking and knows some day he will meet that one beautiful women that will forever take my breath away, a man who would do anything for any one to lighten a load or to get a smile to brighten there day, a man who lives not only for himself but for his family, his friends, and most of all his God. I see a man who takes chances because he knows that life is all about those moments and he doesn't want to chance loosing a single one.
Thats what I see, What about you?
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